Courtney Alexis Stodden AKA "(Media) Whore"

Where do I start with this trainwreck?  This 16 year old girl married the 51 year old owner of her production company.  She's an aspiring singer signed to his production company.  Of course she is.  Her dad is younger than her husband.  Eww.

First of all, I'm not sure I'm buying the whole 16 year old thing.  She looks rough for 16.  I'm beginning to think this whole thing is a publicity stunt for her "music" career.

IF her age is true, this is more than a typical Hollywood May-December romance.  Even the Hef hasn't gone this far!  This girl is 16!!!  That's disgusting.  What does a 16 year old girl know about marriage?  What parent gives consent for this??  Her mother was quoted as saying she's a good Christian girl who was still a virgin on her wedding day.  Big whoopie!  She was 16!  I bet I can find a lot of 16 year old virgins out there.  I'm so glad she was able to hold off until she got married at the ripe old age of 16.

She attends a private, online Christian academy and this is her website.  Where does she keep her Bible when she's wearing only the American flag?

Can you imagine the conversation with her parents when she brought Doug home?

"Mom, Dad, I want you to meet the man of my dreams.  He's 51."

"Courtney Alexis (you know they call her by both names, they're total ultra competitive parents), Daddy is 47."

"I know!  That's why I thought you guys would like him so much - you guys know his kind of music and stuff!  Pretty cool huh?

"Umm....yeah, I guess so..."

"Mom, you didn't listen.  I don't love him or anything.  I said, he's the man of my dreams!  Duh!  Like, he totally owns a production company and he says he can make me STAR!  I just need to marry him so he doesn't look so pervy when we tell the world we're sleeping together.  We'll be married and all our church friends can't say anything bad about us and Wal Mart will carry my CD.  So sign this damn paper."

"Ohhhh why didn't you say so?  Well, now, welcome, sir.  You need me to sign that consent?  No problem.  Las Vegas will let you marry her?  Sounds good to me.  Let's get that wedding planned, she's not getting any younger and her fans are waiting!"

This whole bunch makes me sick.

The husband: Doug Hutchison, is a perv and an idiot and I find him absolutely nauseating to look at.  What 51 year old man thinks a hot, young woman loves him for himself?  Really, Doug?  Come on, we all know it's not your sexy bedroom eyes and fabulous life experience that brings the ladies flocking.  Doug obviously has some cash and he's most certainly promised Courtney Alexis that he WILL make her a star.  C.A. is with this old douche because he can give her something the other juniors in her online classes can't - a Bentley.  And in return he gets her 16 year old hymen - supposedly.  I hear those are worth a lot of money in some circles.

The parents: What can I say?  Of course they signed the consent.  C.A. is their meal ticket and they have no problems with her whoring herself out.  After all, they let her make this video:

WTF?  Apparently they have no qualms about their daughter gyrating in a car like she's got ants in her pants.  P.S. - Her mom can say all she wants that C.A. is "natural".  Those boobs are as natural as C.A.'s blonde hair.

They also let her make this one, where she sings with a dildo.  Oops, I mean large, phallic shaped drink glass that I'm sure is full of Kool Aid:



Courtney Alexis Stodden AKA "(Media) Whore":  This girl is taking way too many acting lessons from Cinemax After Dark.  Yikes.  (Girl, I HOPE you are not 16!)  This girl will stop at nothing to get attention!  These YouTube videos are so disturbing.  Can't they be classified as pseudo kiddie porn??  She has absolutely no talent - well singing, I mean.  It looks like she might be talented in other departments that could also pay the rent.  I think she could work a pole like a pro.  Do you think she learns her moves in classes they teach at her Christian school?  Lip Licking 101?  Boob Thrust for Beginners?  Hair Touching for Dummies?

This wedding (and everything else she does) is obviously a publicity stunt and let me tell ya, it got my attention.  Now go back to school, you trashy POS and stop influencing young girls with your slutty behavior and your unrelenting thirst for fame.

If this was my daughter I would kick her ass - a punch in the throat is too good for her.

Do me a favor, share this with your friends.  Thanks!

20 comments:

Annette said...

Um...yeah, she's is so not 16 years old. If so then she's a very old looking 16 year old.

And those boobs aren't real either.

Forget the throat punch, let's you and I tag team her and pop her in the chesticles.

Jen Piwtpitt said...

Annette, if she's 16 now, imagine how bad she's going to look at 30. Yowza. Lucky for her husband, he'll probably be senile by then so he won't notice.

Laura said...

Um, no way she's 16. And don't even get me started on the lack of talent no matter how old she is.

trocar.trainee said...

SMDH. I honestly don't get it. In my neighborhood, this Doug dude would have had to register as a sex offender.

Dresses by Lola's Mom said...

I've recently (yesterday) been introduced to your blog and I love it! Everything about it. I'm getting caught up on this blog and noticing that more times than not I agree with you however at times while I'm reading I think "oh man, she would totally punch me in my throat right now"

As far as Courtney goes, she is so gross. What is that horrible thing she does with her lips? Licking them. Yuck. I want to stab myself in the eyes. Doug is equally as gross.

You will want to punch me in my throat because if these two get a TV show I'm going to have to watch. Goddammit.

Jen Piwtpitt said...

Uhhh...Lola, if they get a show, I'll have watch parties! I would love to watch that hot mess unfold on TV!! Would never punch you for that!

pj said...

Here's the thing: if she's not 15, I think she's still quite young. Her "sexy" moves are about as sexy as the Toddlers &Tiaras set. She's obviously got no clue about REAL sexy, or her own sexuality.

danielleee said...

She's looking pretty haggard for 16. She looks and sounds like a trashy Kesha wannabe. Yuck.

Jmstahl said...

Uuummm? Did anyone notice the punchline to her website? "Your All American Girl".... Really? Did that just happen? I'm terribly disappointed in America right now.

Jaime said...

I get that its low budget but they couldnt shoot her boat video on an ocean? Just some backwoods swamp behind her inevitable trailer?

Deanna said...

Did you catch her Pumpkin Patch photo shoot? They didn't understand why parents found her poses offensive to little ones actually their picking out pumpkins. She's a mess and I would love to punch her, her douchey husband and her parents in the throat! I still don't believe she is 16. Maybe a combo of meth and plastic surgery? "shrug"

RJS said...

I feel fortunate, that I just found about about Courtney and Doug marriage. I saw a few minutes of their "reality show." If she's only 18, then I'm a Playboy centerfold.

RJS said...

I meant: "Courtney and Doug's marriage." I was probably still stunned, by seeing how happy they are together.

Patti said...

"What 51 year old man thinks a hot, young woman loves him for himself?" Ha-ha -- ALL of them! Just last week I overheard 2 geezers in an old folks home having a conversation that was basically "oh if it weren't for the old ball-and-chain, I'd be bedding my way through acres of 20-year-olds". That's also how our [male] spies keep getting caught -- it never occurs to them the lovely lady on the other team might really be after their information [I mean seriously, look how many times has this happened that we know about!]

Laura said...

Totally agree, and want to add that I find the whole thing ABSOLUTELY TERRIFYING for too many reasons to list!

Anonymous said...

Definitely not real breasts, plus auto tuned to the max. Gross.

Unknown said...

According to Wikipedia she is 18 (will be 19 in a few days). But still. And then there's this... http://www.fashionnstyle.com/articles/10639/20130826/courtney-stodden-plastic-surgery-doug-hutchisons-wife-nude-girls-corpses-magazine-shoot-video-photos.htm

Anonymous said...

yes they were on a Couples Therapy show and nobody else could stand them.

Anonymous said...

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little . . .

rsrusso said...

I googled him to see what he looks like (not impressed) and found this:
http://www.thefrisky.com/2013-07-29/courtney-stodden-doug-hutchison-want-to-be-boning-more/

I didn't hit play cause the words were enough to make me dry heave.

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