Wrap Up 6.10.12

This week I've been busy trying to better my blog.  It's no secret that I want to write full time and the only way to do that is to get sponsors and advertisers.  I went to St. Louis earlier this week to meet with Google AdSense so that they could help me optimize my site.  You'll probably notice some changes over the next few weeks since I'm trying new things.  The newest thing I'm trying is message boards.  It's an awesome feature where we can all chat together so much easier.  It's a little slow to load, but once it does, it's totally worth it.  I am considering doing a live Q&A chat on this message board, so please be sure to sign in and join the discussion.    

I've also been more active on Twitter this week.  I've always had a Twitter presence, but I've treated it like my bastard child while Facebook was my favorite.  The tide is turning.  Zuck and his friends are pissing me off because they are limiting my reach.  I'm hearing from many of you who are no longer seeing me in your newsfeed, which is really uncool when you've elected to subscribe to my updates.  I've been using Twitter a lot to connect with other people who are attending BlogHer '12.  If you're planning on being there, I'd love to meet you, so please tweet me and let me know.  Or better yet, go to the message boards and join the thread about BlogHer '12.

I've also been looking for just the right pair of cargo pants to wear to the Friends Party on June 21. I'm looking forward to attending the Overland Park event.  If you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, read this and then sign up.  If you're the one taking charge of a local event, please create a thread on the message boards.  This will be sooo much easier to plan and discuss your event.  

There's a theme here.  Are you getting it?  Go to the message boards and use them.  It will make your life so much better. 

Top Read Posts:

John Mayer - One word: douche.

Me - Because I Don't Want a Dog - There were many compelling arguments in the comments as to why I should have a dog, but in the end the answer is still "No."

Yes Day - Still hasn't happened.  I might take the advice I saw crop up a lot about not telling them it's Yes Day until it's over.

50 Shades of Grey - PIWTPITT Review - I asked for some book suggestions on Facebook the other night and got loads (thank you), but 50 Shades of Grey just kept popping up and it made me realize that many of you had not seen my fabulous book review, so I reposted it.

New Posts for Babble.com This Week:

My Favorite Comments (and My Replies if Necessary):

Yes, I am not down with earning the "In The Butt" bag either. Negatory. I guess that's why I have the "Half-Hearted Hand Job during Letterman" bag from Marshall's. *sigh* on Wrap Up 6.4.12

Haters gonna hate...Meyer has nailed every hot piece of ass in Hollywood...good for you bro. Swag for days, you be you, and f the haters. on John Mayer

I saw this comment come through and was mildly amused, but I quickly realized I would not need to address it, because the awesome Sarah was on it:

John Mayer! I didn't know you read Jenn's blog! Way to throw us off by spelling your name wrong... but only douche bags use the word swag. You gave it away! on John Mayer

Hands down, this is what I love most about my readers.  They are funny as hell.

Crying. Holding my sides. Had to pull over while driving to finish reading (guess I should've done that in the first place). Your last line is my new line for 2012. You Are Hilarious! on John Mayer

While I appreciate that you never want to miss a word that I've written, PLEASE ALWAYS pull over to read.  OK, I'm done being your mother now. 

Attacking Taylor Swift is like punching a kitten. Have we learned nothing from Kanye? I mean, pretty much nothing, but at least that. on John Mayer

He's like the leader of all the douchebag guys out there. He's like Captain Douche Canoe, I bet they have a secret handshake. on John Mayer

I'm a dog lover, I trained police dogs for a living before I had children. I'd like to support your 'no dog' rule. Only for one reason, if you're not ready and wanting a dog, then it's best you don't. Just like children, unless you really want a baby, they are always going to be more trouble then you can expect. on Me - Because I Don't Want a Dog

My mom raised us the same way! Grandma accidentally taught my oldest to say "damn dog" accidentally at a very young age. I still do not have a dog and hubby is on board BECAUSE he came from a dog home. Yes he was jealous of the treatment the dogs got. There were times MIL would brown hamburger for the dogs and tell him to eat lunch meat out of the fridge. on Me - Because I Don't Want a Dog

I'm 30 and still begging for a dog... only now it's my husband. You would think I have some womanly prowess that I could use on him. NOTHING WORKS!!!!!! He feels the same way you do -they're "sheddy." Good Luck & God Speed Adolpha... I feel your pain girl. on Me - Because I Don't Want a Dog

I think my husband would be more excited about the prospect of a Yes Day than my kid would be... on Yes Day

ok fucktards, has it ever occurred to you that there are some people in this world who are not able to have children and maybe that is why they treat their pets like their babies? Has it occurred to you that not all of us want disgusting children to worship like you psychos do? Shouldn't you be up little junior's ass right now instead of on here? I mean that is what parents of human children do these days they bow down and worship the little shitheads that they created. GET THIS: I'M NOT HAVING KIDS EVER BECAUSE I KNOW HOW TO NOT GET KNOCKED UP, unlike you idiots. Half of you didn't want the brats you got stuck with, and now you are judging people who didn't have kids because you are jealous that they have the time and money that you wish you did to piss away on whatever we want. on Dog Pedicures

Of course it has occurred to me that there are people out there who can't get pregnant.  In fact, I know a several people like that.  It doesn't sound like you're one of those people.  The people I know who struggle to get pregnant would never call a kid disgusting or a shithead.  The people I know who struggle to get pregnant would look into every option they have to get a child - a human - not a dog, because they know that a dog isn't the same.  I'm glad you know how not to get knocked up, because it sounds like you hate children and you'd be a terrible mother.  And for the last time, I am so tired of hearing how "jealous" I am of everything.  I'm not jealous.  I'm just pointing out dumb things people do.  I point my finger all the time at dumb people, but no one gets their hackles up more than combination dog lover/child haters.  Take a fucking Xanax and calm down.  Go paint your dogs' nails, I'm sure it's very soothing for you, you twit.  


K said...

Oh that "Dog Pedicure" lady has issues.

Rachel said...

I am puzzled at why people with children are "psychos". I must've missed something. Just think, if that bitch's mom wasn't a psycho, we wouldn't be reading and laughing at her crazy ass rant right now. It is my sincere prayer that she never gets knocked up.

Anonymous said...

You may need an entire new blog to address that "fucktard". But let me at her first because I want to punch her in the throat after I punch her in the vagina.

Kristi said...

Thank God for birth control! I have 2 kids, shocking, I know ... AND a 4 lb chihuahua ... I love that little dog at times more than the kids, but just like a kid ... She's a major pain in the ass too! Point well made by dog trainer guy, dogs can be just like kids so don't get one without expecting a major commitment ... In fact, I think before having a real child one should consider parenting a 12 week old puppy ;) yes, I got my lap dog bc my kids are growing up, and I wouldn't consider another human child ... although house training the dog may be worse than potty training my boys! I buy her sweaters, and she has a tutu, but I think the "pawlish" is overboard. It's super easy to go overboard so I use my SENSE OF HUMOR to laugh at myself quite often :)

jjj said...

Wow that barren fucktard is a psycho!

Mari said...

Jesus Mary Joseph, that lady is a piece of work. I don't suppose they've figured out a way to reach through a computer screen to throttle someone yet? ..they haven't? Well what's the use of science if you can't use it for rage-murder via the internet?

~*~MizTink~*~ said...

"Well what's the use of science if you can't use it for rage-murder via the internet?"

That has got to be the funniest and most true thing I've read all day!! I'm literally laughing my ass off over here. My boyfriend probably thinks I'm a psycho now :D

I also have to say that I agree with the dog trainer, unless you really do want them and have the time to take care of and love them, don't get a dog (or have children). Despite the fact that I am not a dog person at all, this is the reasoning I give my boyfriend so that we don't get a dog. At the end of the conversation he always sees things my way :)


Sarah said...

Fucktards I want to punch in their Lady Garden??? but that's just a working title.

Sarah said...

Is it sad that I still get geeked when something I posted makes it into the Wrap up? If it is please feel free to punch me in the throat. haha

RachRiot said...

Yea! Thanks for including my comment! And even though now everyone knows I give really bad hand jobs, at least I'm good at snarky comments. So I got that going for me...

Melissa said...

I seriously don't get the hatred that spews out of some of these 'animal lovers'. They're so damn proud of themselves that they're "compassionate", but don't have a clue how to treat people; especially us godless non-pet owners.

Seriously. They have that little going on in their lives that THIS is their battle???


Anonymous said...

Holy SHIT!! Sarah you almost made me piss in my pants.... that's hilarious! :)

Sarah said...

haha I do what I can!

Overachieving Elf on the Shelf Mommies

By now we have all heard of the adorable little Elf on the Shelf . Almost everyone I know has one.  Some people even have two!  (Now I'...

Popular Posts