Fathers Who Won't Change Diapers

So, I was reading an article the other day about Mike Tyson and what a "great dad" he is.  Apparently Mike has something like 8 kids.  He's on his second or third wife and she was gushing to the media about what a great dad he is.  He does everything, everything!  EXCEPT change diapers.


Explain to me how that is being a "great dad."  A great dad is someone who shares in ALL the responsibilities - even the smelliest and nastiest ones.  Can't you just imagine Mike in his little, weird voice:  "Ooooh, stinky poo, I can't go near that!  Yuck.  I think I might throw up!"  This is a man who bit another man's ear off.  Yeah, 'cause that wasn't disgusting!  I will take a blow out that requires a full bath for me AND the kid before I'd ever put a sweaty, bloody ear in my mouth!

I began to wonder who else besides Mike doesn't change diapers.  I wasn't too surprised to find this douche bragging that he doesn't change diapers.  Never has, never will.  Of course, you all know how I feel about him.  Little Barron (I'm surprised Donald didn't name the kid Emperor) probably has a designated woman just for changing him.  I bet he even has a solid gold PeePee TeePee, engraved with his initials no less.

Unfortunately, after some digging, I found that even dads I like Gavin Rossdale, for instance, won't change diapers either!  He's even quoted as saying, "We've got good people" to do that sort of job.  Ick.  I'm so over you, Gavin.  You dick.

I also found out that famous men aren't the only ones who won't change a diaper.  According to a survey done by Pamper's a full 10% of men won't touch a diaper.  Are you kidding me?  What if you're the only one home with the baby?  (Yeah, right, if you won't change a diaper, you won't let the wife leave you home alone with the kids.)  You're just going to let her wallow in her own filth 'til Mommy comes home?  The sad thing is, after my own informal survey of friends and family, I've decided a lot of guys lied to Pampers.

Come on!  Where are the real men out there?  I know I'm married to one.  I know that my husband changed as many (he'll, of course, claim more) diapers as me on any day of the week.  He understood that by being involved in our children's lives (even in those stinky trenches) he was bonding with our kids and setting the foundation for a strong relationship with them in the future.  He also understood that we chose to have these kids TOGETHER.  We're a team.  We're not Fun Guy and Poop Scoop Girl.  We're mom and dad and we both take turns doing the crap jobs when it comes to raising our kids.

Luckily for Mike, Donald and Gavin, they can all afford "good people" to wipe their children's asses, but the rest of us don't have that luxury.  So moms need strong dads to stand up and say, "Here honey, I'll take a turn."  (Trust me, guys, you want to take a turn.  There's nothing sexier than a man who does laundry and changes dirty diapers.  It's like foreplay for us.)  Man up, dads!  Change a diaper and show your kids that you want to involved in ALL aspects of their lives AND show your wives how much you love them.

69 comments:

Gossip_Grl said...

Funny posting on the "dirty diaper deed" It was a funny example of Mike Tyson and diapers. Until your posting I imagined the stars had ppl hired to do that. LOL true parent sacrifice is rock, paper, scissors on who is changing the diaper that just filled up a sleeper from the feet clean up to the neck. :) Enjoyed reading your post

Kelly said...

People wonder why I don't want to get married. What if I marry a douche bag and no one tells me then the ass has to tell me he wont change a diper, I would like to be in my kids life not jail for killing their dad.

just keep swimming said...

I love your a man changing diapers is sexy logic. What else can we get the men to do by convincing them they are sexy doing it? Mopping floors is HOT! Scrubbing a toilet will earn you a BJ. I will show you something new if you clean the garage. Things could get interesting.

Anonymous said...

I worked with a lady whose husband wouldn't change diapers. There were a couple of times where he stayed home with a sick kid and he would bring them to our office so his wife would change the diaper. No joke!

Megan said...

I like a good old fashioned game of "Here, hold the baby so I can tie my shoe... What?! A dirty diaper!? Well you were last holding her last!" (Hasbro will, of course, shorten the name) Actually, I was surprised when I found out that my friends have husbands that won't change diapers. It was never even a question with my husband. We're a team. The end. Should I feel lucky that my husband will do half the work?

Christie said...

Thankfully I married a guy who has no problem changing diapers. I hate the douchey dads who say that they are "babysitting" their own damn kids. You're not babysitting....you're being a responsible parent!!

Elise said...

Anonymous, that lady is crazy to do that. I'd kick his ass for pulling that stunt. Real men change diapers - isn't that on a t shirt? It should be

Anonymous said...

Another reason why my husband is so amazing! This was a non issue. It never even occured to me that there may even be the slightest possibility that he wasn't going to be involved in this aspect of his kids' life! I seriously thought attitudes like this died out 30 plus years ago! Forgive me for being so naive about this subject matter!

Anonymous said...

I used to be friends with a woman whose husband wouldn't change dirty diapers either. Used to be. He didn't like it when I called him on it when I was at their place one time and that was the beginning of the end of our friendship.

Meg @ The Crunchy Conservative said...

My husband will whine & complain if I ask him to change a diaper, but he does it. And if I'm not home, he does it. But honestly, is all the drama (the complaining, the gagging, the putting his shirt over his face) really necessary? Get over it!

Anonymous said...

I have two older girls who are now 13 and 10. When I was with their "father", and they were babies, he would tell me that they needed to be changed. He would also make me take them into the bathroom with me even if he was home so I could watch them while I took a piss. Anyway, I am no longer with that asshole. Now, I have a 7 week old baby boy with the love of my life and he is an amazing father to my girls and his new son. There are good ones out there.

Anonymous said...

My husband was thrilled to change our daughters first diaper. During our hospital stay I never touched a diaper. I took on my share once home. He even did the majority if the potty training. We work opposite schedules so no babysitter.

perkiwindy said...

We have 1 year old twins. My husband not only changes their diapers, he changes CLOTH diapers. I married up...

Anonymous said...

That douche baby daddy to the Kardashian girl is proud that he doesn't do diapers either.

My husband is a REAL man. Although he does tend to say "Honey, he pooped again..." from the couch.

Anonymous said...

In our house I nicknamed those stinky messes "daddy diapers". As in, "uh-oh, I smell a daddy diaper". It was a running joke. Thankfully for me, I also married a MAN who never questioned taking his turn to change a stinky diaper.

Anonymous said...

My husband has always picked up our girls from daycare so has definitely changed plenty of diapers, though if we were both home the stinky ones almost always got changed by me.
One time I came home from work and found little pieces of poop in my daughter's hair. When I asked what happened, he explained that she had a blow out- the kind where poop was basically up to her neck. So he stripped her, turned the shower on, grabbed her by the ankles and put her in. Seriously. That was the actual solution. So it all basically ended up in her hair, but he "tried" to wash it all out.
Brilliant

Kelly and Sne said...

While we share pretty equally in the diaper division for the most part (and now the wiping poopy butts division since the kids are potty trained), the first 6 - 12 months or so of having our first kid we had a mutually beneficial division of labor. He was grossed out by messy poopy diapers but didn't mind boogers. While I gag if I see - or even think too much about - big green boogers but didn't mind the poop so much. So I did the messy diapers and he did the booger sucker and whatever else he had to do to get those snotty things out of there (of course he enjoyed describing them to me in detail just to make me ill...). Now a few years later I think we are both desensitized to any and all bodily secretions from children. To the point of holding out your hand so the kid can barf into it rather than all over the car!

Ladybug914 said...

I remember being aghast that my friend's husband never seemed to change diapers. It turns out that she had hung over him, criticizing his early attempts, and he gave up even trying. I blame both of them. And it wasn't just diapers, it was doing any child care. She positioned herself as being the "expert" and he never could do anything to her satisfaction. Drove me nuts to watch, but since I didn't have a child of my own, yet, she discounted my thoughts on the subject.

When my husband and I had our first baby, I went with the approach that I was just as brand new a parent as he was, so I wasn't any more of an expert. He may not have done things like diaper changing, or burping the baby, the exact same way I did, but the baby was fine, either way, so it wasn't my job to criticize his methods. My husband actually ended up being better at things like soothing a colicky baby because he had more patience than I did. I will also freely admit that he probably did change more diapers than I did, over the course of two babies' worth of diapers.

Sadly, my friend, while realizing I might have been right after seeing my husband regularly changing our kids' diapers, wasn't able to reverse the damage done with her husband. I don't think he ever changed a diaper for their second baby.

Brooke said...

I married a man who decided to swear AFTER we said vows that he would never, EVER change a dirty diaper. He also decided to start punching me on our honeymoon, and I luckily got the courage to leave the asshole and get an annulment. I remarried a better man, had a beautiful baby girl and have been gladly splitting diaper duty ever since. In fact, since I stay home with her all day he takes diaper duty all night to even things up. His best friend knocked up his girlfriend unexpectedly and tries to say shit like this (as well as tell her she's so lazy because she sleeps all the time...during her second trimester while STILL puking 5 times a day) so I frequently rip him a new asshole :)

Steph said...

I can honestly say, I didn't change a single diaper the first 3 days of BOTH my children's lives. My husband did every single one! He knew I was exhausted and it was his way of taking time with the babies, since I was breastfeeding and he couldn't be a part of that. Amazing father I picked for my kids.....

Sara said...

So, what if those people didn't have "people" to do the diaper changing. What if they'd turned out differently in life and had to deal with the poop?

I mean, come on! We're all washable!

Christi said...

Ladies, be warned: even dads who are cool with sharing diaper duty become reluctant to take up the task when grandkids are involved. My dad refuses to touch my boys' nappies, though I'm told he chipped in when my brother and myself were babies--guess he figures he's paid his dues.

Anonymous said...

YES! What is this "babysitting" business? You do not babysit your own child. Exactly like you said, you are being a responsible parent and spending time with them!

melissa said...

Christi.... grandkids are a whole other ball game. My poor husband didn't get to build up to toddler diapers as he was deployed for the first 18 months with both kids LOL! When he was home he changed a bunch but I would still pick on him by telling him he deployed to avoid diapers. He's a pretty awesome guy and gives as good as he gets!

Anonymous said...

I would never have children with such a selfish man. Period.

Amanda said...

Forget changing diapers, although my hubs did that as well, but what I appreciated him so much more for was cleaning the poopy "potty-trained" pants.

Men, if you are surprised when your wives lose their shit and go crazy on their kids on a daily basis, ask yourself one question, "What am I doing to help her raise our spawn?" Your help helps us keep our sanity, not to mention increases your chances of getting laid on a regular basis!

Amanda said...

WHY?! WHY would you put up with that. It honestly makes me want to punch the woman in the throat more than the loser she married! If you are getting that treatment, it's because you ALLOW it.

Anonymous said...

I still resent my father's 'pride' at announcing he never changed a diaper. My mother had me then 23 months later had twins. So three kids in diapers for years, with no nanny, no help, nothing. Sometimes her mom or mother in law would help but largely she was on her own. That's likely why I was EXTREMELY clear with my husband before we married/got pregnant with our first child about doody duty. I am not a f'king house slave. We both agreed to have kids - and I love the line in this blog about "fun guy and poop scoop girl". You cannot pick and choose which child duties you will do. THEY ALL NEED TO BE DONE. You are a parent, you do them. I also get annoyed at women who coo and are so impressed when a guy does ANYTHING baby related, as if the guy doesn't really 'have' to do it and he's 'amazing' to 'pitch in'. Ladies, it's that kind of BS response that causes men to think they have the ability to get off the hook when they want to. Every woman should push back and say, F this - you do it or I'm not having kids with you. End of story.

Anonymous said...

My husband always changed his share of the diapers. No complaints, no whining. That was just how we did things...however, there might have been a game of rock, paper, scissors for those early Saturday morning poops!!

Britt

Mandi said...

I know there are tons of dads who won't change diapers but there are A TON of women who won't change them either...I just can't imagine my kid running around with a shitty diaper because I was too sensitive to change it ..pssh!

Anonymous said...

I saw an interview of Donald on the view... he said, and I quote "I'm a good dad. But I'm not very hands on. I spend like 4 minutes with the kid, tell him I love him, and then send him off to someone else. No no no, I'm not the type to play catch with my kid. But I'm a good father.

Sarah said...

I cannot imagine being a woman who would not demand assistance in all child care tasks. He's unsure about how to change a diaper, hand him the smelly (likely gurgling proudly) infant, the stack of diapers and wipes, and tell him to figure it the f*** out. As for the "we have people for that" parents - they can bite me.

Anonymous said...

My father in law Has 2 kids and 6 grandkids and also boasts that he has never changed a diaper. I cant stand him for it!! My poor mother in law is the sweetest woman ever and it breaks my heart that he forces her to do all the work!! It is truly a miracle that he raised my husband - who is quite honestly the MOST hands on father I have ever met! I guess it's because his mom is truly the one he looked up to!! Thank God for that!

Tabitha said...

My husband also did all the diaper changing in the hospital. We were there for 3 days because of c-section & it was great to have all that help so that I could recovery from surgery. Some men are the best ever!

Rebekah Guzman said...

I had one of those husbands that was on a completely different playing field than most dads...especially the douche canoes in you story. I thought my son was sleeping through the night at two months old. It turned out my husband was waking up with him and never once tried to wake me...nor did he ever complain. He believed that our child was a joy to spend time with, no matter the task. Unfortunately, he died in a tragic accident when our son was six months old. And I have been single for the past six years because that man see the bar so high! Real men do exist!!!...and they are worth the wait.

Anonymous said...

My husband changes diapers all the time, and even got on board with cloth diapers. He's the real deal, and I'm very lucky to have him (as is my son)!

imbogus1 said...

What a wimp!

Jo said...

We had a friend who "bragged" about the first time he gave his daughter a bath. She was eight months old! He said that before that she was just too slippery when she was wet. My husband used to push me out the door and tell me to go play with grown ups when our son was a baby. He did it all.

PhotoBugLis said...

I change the vast majority of diapers at my house. I've had 2 kids in diapers for 3 years. My husband will change them if I ask, or if he is home by himself with the kids, but I do most of them. BUT, he does all of the cooking and most of the cleaning and is no way an hands-off father. Sometimes people just divide labor differently. As long as it is working for both, who cares?

Jenn @ Something Clever 2.0 said...

The nurse tried to change my son's first diaper, and my husband jumped in and stopped her. She was FLOORED. As was every nurse who saw him changing him for the next three days. We were both horrified and disgusted when they told us how unusual it was for a dad to act like a parent. What the hell?!

Anonymous said...

YOu go Brooke!

jsmidt said...

Not only did my husband change both our children's diapers, he even had to help my father who is 84 change a very disgusting diaper when we took him to a festival. Yes, he did complain after, but he did it and how many men would even attempt it?
Don't know if my dad changed my diapers or not, but I have had to do this for him. Father's who won't might want to consider this before bragging about it to their adult children!!!

Robin said...

Can we add to this list Dad's who say they are "Babysitting" when they are watching their own kids? WTF dude??! It's called PARENTING!!

Anonymous said...

I can't believe she's having another baby with him!! Dummy!!

Unknown said...

That is so sad. :o( But a great thing to be able to share with your son, that even though he only had a short time to show it, his daddy cherished him.

Anonymous said...

HA! My husband only changed diapers when he absolutely had to. He even once told me he "didn't like to change diapers". I have had endless enjoyment with that quote from him. Because apparently I love a nice full diaper right? But on the plus side he volunteered to change the cat litter for life and he has what I call "carcass duty" when the cats leave a present at the front door!

Unknown said...

My husband is a nursing tech and just graduated from nursing school to become an RN. His job is to change full grown veterans when they are incontinent. He does that without blinking an eye so changing a little poopy baby diaper is practically a joyful experience for him. That being said, I really don't care what goes on in other people's homes. As long as the baby is clean and the arrangement works for everyone, it's all good.

Kelli said...

I wouldn't even give them benefit of thinking they're "sexy" if they do it. BE A REAL FATHER OR PREPARE TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT, JERKFACE. PERIOD.

Kelli said...

AMEN.

Anonymous said...

It's "Father's Day just passed" not "past".
Twelve baby birdies just fell out of their nests dead to the ground. Quickly, just edit and pretend I'm a whacko.

Anonymous said...

damn. Gavin was on my list.

Anonymous said...

I have to say that even as a mom I felt the same way as this guy. I would have volunteered to change EVERY dirty diaper just to avoid bath duty...they really are too slippery as newborns!

Kristen said...

My hubby was a stay at home Dad for the first 4 years of my daughter's life. Right after she was born, I was deathly ill and he had to be the full time caregiver and do it all. I don't think he would trade anything in the world for the time he spent at home with her. Changing diapers wasn't the highlight of his day, but he did it knowing that's what came with having a child. I do think he ended up changing more diapers than I did, and he made sure that when I was home from work I did the diaper duty, but he also made sure our daughter was well cared for!

Submommy said...

So, Fun Guy and Poop Scoop Girl is totally the new Marvel comic, right?

Thankfully, my Hubs got in the poop trench right along with me. In fact, he was changing The Girl's diaper once, lifting her little bum up for a wipe and she started to pee. (He had even put the new diaper under it beforehand.) She farted and the pee sprayed in his face.

I'm proud to report that he finished the diaper change before he took care of the pee on his face.

THAT'S a real man.

Who Woulda Thought? said...

I not only change the diapers of my Minions, I changed the first black tar nasty ass diaper in the hospital on all three. I have been peed on, pooped on and farted on....

whowouldathought-Kevin.blogspot.com

Neurotic Atty said...

My husband happily and proudly changes diapers. Unfortunately, he's pretty terrible at it, and poor Molly usually ends up with her diaper hanging half-way off her butt or with one butt cheek exposed because it's so crooked. I just dont have the heart to make him sit through anymore diapering lessons.

Linda Roy said...

Yeah - such a manly man. Explain to me, Mike, how biting a guy's ear off is not icky, but baby poop is. sheesh The Hubby changed diapers and helps with everything. There's a whole new generation of dads who roll up their sleeves and get involved and we're lucky they do. Thank Goddess we don't have to put up with the shit our mother's did. No pun intended.

Amanda said...

I am guessing he had the perfect example of what not to do, and ran in the opposite direction.

Bethann said...

I love this.. My husband always said "I'll change the diapers when they are my kids" when referring to nieces and nephews and he held true. He jumped right in the day my children were born he was changing diapers in the hospital. And he consistantly changed diapers up until they all were out of them. No job that I do is too bad/good for him to do as well. And THAT is why I love him.

Bethann said...

his best friend IS an asshole from the sounds of it.. just sayin'

bkidsocr said...

My hubs changes diapers all the time.

Anonymous said...

This phenomenon doesn't apply to just men. After watching my infant daughter on not one, but two occassions (when she was 4 and 6 weeks old) my bitch-ass mother-in-law sent my baby girl home covered in poop, saying that "it had been years since she changed a diaper and she raised only boys so changing girl's diapers was different and besides she thought I'd prefer to do it myself" (among other lame-ass excuses) instead of admitting that she didn't want to change a diaper!

ILoveItWhen said...

I am apparently a horrible wife. I stay home in th day while my hubby works his grueling five hour shift and change all diapers. Once he gets home it's up to him. My husband is a stinky guy if you get my wift and passed it on to junior. I wok forty hours so figure on weekends any stinkies are his responsibility. Whenever he bitches I tell him that I am more than happy to work part time and clean up all the poo. If he bitches I mention the whole house cleaning, dinner making, grocery shopping, 9'pet caring, nursing, and mommy group crap dealing I do every day BEFORE I go to work to pay EVERY BILL with my paycheck. And just to show I'm not a nag I never even bring up the side business I run to help out. ;)

Janice's Blog said...

I am a stay at home mom so I obviously change all the daytime diapers, I don't change any after hubby is home! While we joke that some of the messy diapers are 15 wipers for him and 2 wipes for me, he still doesn't complain while changing them. I change my kids over my lap so they don't have to lay on the floor. One time he was trying my technique and the poop rolled out of the diaper, down his pants, and hit the floor. Laughed SO HARD! The moral of the story is: Daddy makes the shit roll!

AJ said...

I never really thought about it but I am glad that my hubby was more than willing to help out with diaper duty. I actually preferred changing diapers myself to make sure our baby was completely and properly cleaned but I knew how important it was to make the hubby "feel" his role as a dad so I'd say "sure honey, go ahead!". It really is to each his own but dads who BRAG that they've never changed a diaper is too odd.

Anonymous said...

When my cousin was little, my Uncle "babysat" her while my aunt was shopping. Well of course Suzie pooped. So her dear daddy sat her in the bathtub, diaper and all and grabbed himself a book to read while sitting on the toiled (actually sitting) until my aunt returned. YEP, that was 40 years ago. We still taunt him for that.

Julia P F said...

I can't believe more people arent commenting on what a dousche Mike Tyson is! Did anyone else see the interview on Today where he confused "vegan" with "virgin"?! I though Ann Curry was going to fall out of her chair. It's not everyday I get to start my day off talking about VD, prostitutes, and Mike Tyson in action!

Anonymous said...

My husband never wants to and literally i want to kick his ass so bad everyday becuase i do everything. Cook clean care for kids and obey in everything!!!!! But cant say nothing cuz im scared of him. I cant divorce i cant do nothing. Im always pist in the inside

Anonymous said...

Would never change them and i dont like kids at all. I dont think that toddlers are cute at all, they look so strange? And the noise, and smell all day long, OMG, how are you doing this all day long?

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