Why It Sucks to be a Woman Today


As you know by now, I believe strongly in rights for women and I absolutely can not stand it when politicians, (mostly celibate) clergyMEN, and anyone else starts telling me (and my daughter) what I can and can not do with my reproductive organs and how much they expect me to pay for these "rights."

I don't understand why this is even a debate about religious freedom.  This is not an attack on religion, it is an attack on women thinly disguised as an attack on religion.  To me, the argument is simple:  religious institutions accept government money, thus they must follow the healthcare mandate that has been put to them by the government that gave them the money.  If the institution has female employees they should not be able to say which ailments/conditions/medications/etc. they are willing to pay for.  That is discrimination.  That's why I believe this is a war on women.  Believe me, if this was about paying for erectile dysfunction meds or prostate exams, the guys would be allllll over that.


Why are men at the forefront of this controversy?  I am just amazed that once again men are waging war against women.  Yes, men are waging this war.  Have you seen the charming gentlemen who suggested we stick an aspirin between our knees?

And I find it frightening that I haven't hardly heard a peep from a woman.  Where are the women?  Why aren't the women speaking up and saying exactly what they want?  I'm not saying that every woman is on my side.  I know there are women out there who agree with these guys, but even they aren't speaking out and saying this is what they want.

What is going on???  Where are our voices???  Why do we as women sit there and allow men to tell us what to do with our own bodies???

Ladies, men would never let us get away with this kind of behavior.  Why aren't more women angry?  Why aren't women concerned about this latest attack?

Don't let these men make laws that affect your bodies without at least speaking up - for or against.  Let them know how you feel and let them know what you want.

Do you really want to pay $100 or more in co-pays each month for contraception?  Do you really want an unplanned pregnancy because you couldn't afford your co-pay?

I sure don't.

Here is my birth control story:  I am almost 40 years old.  I can not have another baby.  I am too old and I am too poor to afford another one.  The Hubs and I are a bit "explosive" together.  He looks at me cross eyed and I get pregnant.  I got pregnant with Gomer when I was on the Pill and then I got pregnant with Adolpha the first day I went off the Pill.  After Adolpha I knew we were done with our family and I asked my doctor for his advice since the Pill was not effective for me and no one who's married likes condoms.  He recommended an IUD.  I love it.  I have had the same IUD now for 5 years and 1 month.  The expiration in the United States on the Mirena is 5 years.  (In other parts of the world, the same Mirena is "good" for another 2 years - don't even get me started on the drug companies and their B.S.)  I need another IUD.  When I got the one I have now, I paid a co-pay of $750.  In those days, the Hubs had a good job and good insurance and we could afford that.  Today we are both self-employed and we pay a small fortune for crappy insurance that probably will cover very little of my new IUD.  I haven't even had the guts to call my doctor to find out what my new IUD will cost (I can only imagine).  Instead, I'm hoping that France got it right when they said my Mirena would work effectively for 7 years, because if it doesn't I'm afraid the system is going to have another welfare baby on their hands.

252 comments:

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Anonymous said...

I'm worried about the same thing! I have one one kid who beat the pill, one I screwed up the pill, and one "Oh shit... Nuvaring fell out." kid. I can't screw this up, but was already paying $800 every time I need a new one.

MJ said...

AMEN!!! Thank you! Agree 1000%!! I'd like to have a chat with Mr. Aspirin guy -- what a douche canoe!

Crystal said...

totally ridiculous.. just asking for more expense and more problems. health insurance just keeps covering less and less.. they don't cove my acid reflux medication either and they wont cover my "name brand" prescription even though i have tried the generic and the side effects are intolerable for me with the generic.. id say blurred vision and getting up to pee 5 times a night along with extreme tiredness is intolerable when the brand name doesn't have any of those effects... the price i have to pay with insurance for 1 month supply --- $90!

Pepper said...

Go for Paraguard. It's a non-hormonal IUD that could basically last forever.

kamburgy said...

So I recently encountered something similar. They will pay for my birth control pills each month but the copay for mirena is $865 dollars! Its 99% effective and it lasts 5 years if not more. So I don't get it???? Why would the insurance companies not help make this cheaper and more available??? It would save their butts a ton of money in unplanned pregnancies!!!

Anonymous said...

This video is 16 minutes, but it explains the problems of birth control mandates: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U73xKgbXh68. Basically, the gov't mandates reduce women's choices. If, as a woman, I choose to take a less expensive route for birth control, I'm still charged as though I'm going to take the most expensive route (and the employer WILL pass the costs on to the employee -- TANSTAAFL). When gov't gets involved, prices go up. If gov't stays out, prices will go down. It's better for women (and men) if gov't leaves us alone.

coffeeaddictedmommy said...

I get pissed off just thinking about this. First of all, I was put on the pill 10 years ago to prevent giant cysts I was getting on my ovaries. Where do these men stand on that? Or do they not want to discuss things like ovaries? Second of all, it's bad enough that people PLAN children they can't afford, now there can be tons of unplanned children people can't afford. I am actually pretty liberal, and it makes me laugh how the people that don't think women should have access to birth control are the SAME people who don't want to pay for social programs like Medicaid and Welfare. What a joke. It really is an attack on women, isn't it?

Lara Collins Breon said...

I can relate. My family's female are the same way. When our daughter turned one, I asked my husband (who had only wanted one kid, being an "only" himself)if he thought we might like to consider another. Good thing he said yes, as we found out the next day that I was 6 weeks along (while breastfeeding AND on the pill- kid 1 was also conceived while on the pill).
i opted to have my tubes tied, because it was a cheaper co-pay than an IUD.

Jenny S said...

I agree 100% and my kids go to a conservative Catholuc school and I'm getting emails non stop from women in the school and parish who support the bishops. I speak up when given the chance and post my support for Obama's policy on Facebook but it turns ugly so quickly it's not always worth it. I worry about how these crazy conservatives will treat my kids because of my politics! Even if we left the school, the city I live in is largely the same way! It's so frustrating. By the way, I have 3 daughters who are 10, 8 & 7 and I found out four weeks ago I'm pregnant with twins. How did I find out you ask? I was supposed to schedule my appointment to get the mirena when my period started and it didn't start! It was going to cost $1200, which we don't have but is certainly a lot less than the twins are going to cost! So get the mirena if you have to beg borrow or steal...or better yet, find a way to pay for your husbands vase tony. Surprise pregnancies are no joke.

Jenny S said...

Stupid auto correct...vase tony should have been vasectomy

Jen said...

Excellent post! I couldn't agree with you more. And the aspirin guy? He needs to be punched in the throat. And kicked in the nads.

Krissy said...

One, birth control should be free. Period. Two, I understand your situation; my youngest beat the NuvaRing. I, too, am too old and poor to have more kids. So, when our youngest was an infant, my husband had a vasectomy. Two words to your husband: Snip. Snip.

mrskristinmoore said...

You would think the insurance companies would rather pay for the birth control rather than paying the lifetime of doctors appointments, hospital stays, medications, and so on that a new member of the insurance policy would generate. I've heard the UK and maybe other parts of Europe (?) are able to provide free healthcare.. why can't the US? Oo that's right.. we're too broke sending money to other countries in "trouble". Ugh.

maarmie said...

Over in the UK, we have the NHS. All doctor visits are free for everyone and, if you receive certain kinds of government funds, so are prescriptions. Scrips for all children under 16 are free as well as are eye exams and dental visits. Sure, we pay a buttload in taxes, but everyone has access to healthcare. I'm American, by the way, and moved here from Florida four years ago. I had great insurance working for the state but have heard some of the horror stories since of employer cutbacks and even-more-greedy-for-profit insurers that cut and cut and cut what is even covered. I'll take public health any day. I don't have to live in fear that if I lose my job then my daughter can't go to the fucking doctor. America is so fucked up in so many ways and it really does fail the vast majority just so the ones who already have it all can have even more. Good riddance!

maarmie said...

Oh, and while some of you are getting all excited about this state or that state legalizing gay marriage, just keep in mind that gay partnerships in this whole country have been recognized for a long time. America = Fundamentalist patriarchal oligarchy.

Anonymous said...

You hit the nail on the head -- if this pertained to anything related to the health and well-being of old white men, this would not even be up for debate. It's sad to realize, even in this day and age, that women are still perceived as second-class citizens who don't warrant equal pay for having to work harder to accomplish what they do, especially in more male-dominated industries.

As for health insurance, I'm convinced it's all a scam. No one other than me and my doctor(s) should be involved in determining what medical procedures or medicine I need. And the reason the monthly birth control is "less" than a long-term IUD or other method is because of the drug companies. Developing and manufacturing a device that lasts for five years doesn't generate the income (and profits) that a daily oral medicine will. The glories of capitalism.

GretnaMom said...

You'll love this conversation I had on this subject the other day it went something like this:
Rebecca (that's me): All I know is most of the Catholic women I am friends with don't follow the Churches mandate against the use of birth control. The Catholic church's policies are outdated in this area. I'm sure they don't have a problem with paying for a man's Viagra pills so why shouldn't their insurance have to provide access perfectly legal forms of birth control.

Allen(my brother the Rev.): Again that may be true, but how many of those same people are against the churches stance on abortion? This issues is much deeper than just "birth control". Because some of the things that they are mandating to have available are also used for abortion.

Michael(my brother's friend): Lots of people, Catholic and Protestant alike, don't follow the Church's teachings. This does not on any level require that the Church "catch up" or change its policies and doctrines just because folks won't follow the rules anyway (like giving condoms to school-age children without parental consent), and such reality does not speak well of the faithful. It only exposes us for the self-serving persons we really are. In birth control, in sterilization, in abortion are all contained human will that bears no divine resemblance at all and cannot be biblically justified. It's just what we demand - not unlike ancient Israel before they fell. That is, if we believe those "myths". Judging by the behavior of the contemporary church, apparently we do not.

Rebecca: Taking birth control is "self-serving" ?? Seriously?!?!

Michael: Very seriously. Nothing divine in it at all.

irishgirlmurphy said...

Jen
I couldn't agree more. I have signed every petition out there since the Komen thing happened. It's disgusting. I also find it very "interesting" that "they (men & clergy) are all up in arms about female birth control, when I haven't heard one single god damned thing about not paying for vasectomies. Unless, I'm sadly mistaken (and I'm not!), a vasectomy surely interferes with "God's plan"just as much as the Pill does. Religious institutions should be just as opposed to paying for that service, but they aren't. Wonder why?

I also don't understand the logic behind not paying for birth control, and consequently having to pay for the results (ie: children) of not having it. Not to mention the botched back alley abortions and the other terrible things that could happen as a result.

I wanted to share this clip with you, as I too was wondering "Where are the women?" Apparently at least some of them are on Capitol Hill...http://www.democracynow.org/2012/2/17/where_are_the_women_lawmakers_walk

Jenni @ RainyDayGardener said...

Thanks for writing a post on this and getting some chatter about it. It's appalling that this war on women has risen again. Out here on the west coast, there is chatter about it and disgust. But move over, there is a sense of disbelief that as a nation, we are even debating this topic and that men are getting to vocalize with power what we can and cannot do with our bodies. Make your vote count ladies!

amber D said...

It is outrageous that the government and med companies have put such high prices on birth control and health insurance. I am a substitute teacher ( with certification but no jobs, and my position doesn't offer benefits) and my husband has a good job with benefits offered but we can not afford to carry it. We have one child already but would like another, if only we could afford to carry health insurance. (My son has insurance through his S.D.) This also rules out birth control because of cost. Our best hope is that I find a permanent teaching position soon (since i went to 5 years of college for it and all!). Basically, the state of our economy and government suck for many different reasons, and electing another rich jack-ass is not going to fix things!

Jessa said...

because they aren't allowing women to speak up...

http://thinkprogress.org/health/2012/02/16/426850/democratic-women-boycott-issas-contraception-hearing-for-preventing-women-from-testifying/

Anonymous said...

No, no no! Paraguard was the absolute worst. Heavier and longer periods instead of lighter to almost none with Mirena. Though it is hormone free, I was on my period about 22 days out of the month. No thank you!! And I paid to have it removed. Worst thing every made. Not surprising my male doctor told me it was the same as Mirena but last longer. Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!

Anonymous said...

Women are angry and they are screaming however the 'panels' that are publicized are all male. It is pretty insane. These are the same people that want to make abortion unavailable. I do not think anyone is "FOR" abortion, we all want to make it unnecessary. The best way to do that is to stop unplanned pregnancies. That means available birth control. It should be free.
Most insurance companies do not pay or barely pay as in your case. (Viagra is covered). Insurance companies are in for the short term gain. People change insurance companies so that if insurance company A does not pay for birth control there is a strong possibility that insurance company B paus for the birth and health care of the child. They have the same logic for a lot of vaccines. The problem is that woman A has a baby that she did not plan on (I am not going to say does not want, unplanned is not unwanted) and may not be able to afford.
Personally I was told I could not have children, my unplanned is in college now, the other one was planned at it took me about a week to get pregnant.

Anonymous said...

I am very passionate about this subject. I am posting anonymously because not many people in my life know my story, but I've had a few unplanned pregnancies ON the pill (these ended up miscarriage). I went to Planned Parenthood when I didn't have insurance and got these prescriptions because they were cheaper that way. Now, I have an IUD because my first born child was a result of the pill. My IUD cost me $25 co-pay on my last insurance and that was 11 months ago. I only pray that it's still available to me when it's time to have it replaced. It's absolutely ridiculous to me that people tend to equate using the pill-abortion-birth control on people who are 16 and irresponsible. I am married and do not want anymore children because I can not afford any. It's like these politicians think that it's not an issue in marriage because once you are married, you just get to have sex and procreate as much as you'd like. While that many be fine for certain families, it's not fine for ours. I have never understand how these men have to audacity to sit on their thrones and make these laws. Oh, and I am sure the women who they are having affairs with are either on birth control or would have things "taken care of" if they ever got pregnant. I am one of those who is a Christian but doesn't necessarily believe abortion is RIGHT, but I also believe it's not mine or anyone's choice to make for that woman. And if you make it illegal, it won't stop it from happening, it will only make it happen in back alleys and "home rememdies" like they did in earlier times. I just do not understand why this is something that is to be decided by anyone other than the individual person. It scares me that people like Santorum, who want to criminalize abortion, are even considered to be a Presidential candidate. It's not someone I want to be in charge of my fate,

megan said...

Let's get this straight, if men were the ones that carried babies, there would be birth control in beer. And probably the end of the human race. If men were responsible for bringing in children we wouldn't have any. Most men would not be accepting of the career crushing, hormone scrambling, bags of debt that would pop out of there doodles leaving their "manly parts" a massacre form of what they once were. But since women have it covered, it's like they need to be as offensive about it as possible.

Anonymous said...

Jen, I have been writing my state Reps here in Virginia - if you don't know the biggest battle right now is in VA. (Buckle of the Bible Belt.) It is insane that these people want Govt to be small and out of our lives but then want to be in our doctor's offices and bedrooms?

Because we are women and need to have more babies? Ah - no. We need to be able to plan our families and our pregnancies. Even then, things can go wrong.

So, don't think all women are not voicing their opinions and writing their reps and demanding our freedom to choose. Now, I have my personal view of choice/life too but I also believe that it is not right to impose my values on someone else. I don't know their story. In a Democracy - we don't always get what we want, we get what overall people need.

Ms. Jonas said...

I had the oops-we-got-pregnant-on-the-nuvaring-baby, and that's after i went off of the makes-me-go-bat-shit pill. I loved Mirena, and as soon as this baby is out, that sucker is going right back in. And not just for birth control reasons but because I have endometriosis and that prevents the growth of the disease. If men could get endometriosis, there would not even be a debate. Of course, the same could be said of a period. They'd use Mirena so they never had to see blood again.

Cami said...

uggg...I could write for hours on this topic, but I wont. lol I'm with you on the IUD thing..I'm on round two also. The first IUD I got put in was covered with my then insurance and I just paid my copay to get it put in...I'm on round two and this time I had to pay $850! But lucky me, they offer payment plans for this one. Sooo frustrating.

Jeremy A said...

I am male and strongly on the side of women when it comes to these issues you are faced with. Believe me, if these politicians had our insurance and had a cyst on their scrotum and was asked to pay what you pay...heads would roll. I being a tight ass with our money, and knowing we were done with kids and hate condoms,..knew it would be cheaper in the long run and cheaper than a single treatment of Mirena, got a vasectomy. The vas costs me $600 one time and is forever, Mirena or similar products would have been in the thousands before my wife hit menopause and no longer required it. Our sex life is way better too, which of course is worth it by itself. My wife does enough for our family, the least I could do is take away the worry that I may have once again knocked her up.

Aimee Mae said...

This is the exact argument I don't understand why it hasn't been brought up, in those exact words!

Aimee Mae said...

You know what I don't understand? If they are trying to prevent woman from having sex... who to they expect to have sex with then? Lol.... although the truth really isn't that funny.

Anonymous said...

I've often said that if a guy had to wear a Nuvaring around his penis to prevent pregnancy, the damn thing would be free and available on every street corner.

Stay out of my uterus and away from my contraception as well as my daughter's!

Mellissa Stanton said...

We can't afford another baby either. Plus we don't have health insurance because we own our own business.Condoms suck ass when your married.

Julie E said...

I have one Nuvaring kid and one Pill kid, and I was using both properly. At least the Mr. is clipped and snipped now. Women should be speaking up about men having to be the ones responsible to "take" birth control. Maybe then they would care about the cost.

Insane3 said...

The Hubster and I had decided we were done after our second baby. 1.5 years later (and 1 week after discussing the pros and cons of having another, which we decided against) and then we discovered that were (of course) pregnant, while on the pill. Yeah, not happy at all. The day after the little D.S. (demon spawn) was born, I had my tubes tied AND I'm grateful that option was available at the time!!!!
Let me clarify, so that no one jumps my ass, I couldn't imagine life without my little D.S., I consider him a very special *surprise* gift and we love him to pieces. However much I now want him, I wasn't thrilled at the time that the pill failed me. My good friend and I (each having grown up in perociol schools) have debated this issue wildly. Why is it even possible in this day and age, that the church and
or govt has any say with regards to women's health care?!
It should be our choice and it should be financially affordable. Responsible individuals struggle to afford birth control, irresponsible scheming wastrels make a living off of it by not getting on it (even though it-like everything else- is free to them) and "good" Christians live off the good graces of the churches charity for familial survival because birth control is frowned upon. No wonder other countries feel compelled to laugh at our idiocy.

Anonymous said...

I'm a young(ish), Independent voter that usually sides with Republicans on a lot of issues. This is most definitely NOT one of them! They can keep their politics out of my uterus. I cannot stand Rick Sanctimonious and the others like him. His view of women dates back centuries!

And what makes me most angry is what is happening in Virginia right now. They are very close to making it so a fertilized egg has rights. A FERTILIZED EGG. Try getting pregnant (on purpose) and disobeying your doctor's orders. Go ahead...eat a piece of tuna, drink coffee...better hope you don't miscarry because you could be looking at a murder charge.

I am not for abortion, and I don't think I could ever have one, but I don't want some rich, white man that doesn't even know me telling me that I couldn't have one if I decided it was right for me. I will be the only one standing before God, not those jerks that think they know what's best.

Here's a video about what's going on in VA: http://video.msnbc.msn.com/the-rachel-maddow-show/46391123

RachRiot said...

Yes, that makes me mad as hell! p.s. My hubs also got the old "snip-snip" a few years back so I don't have to worry about it. BONUS: It was highly enjoyable watching him spread-eagle with his feet in the stirrups. I wish I had brought a camera.

Anonymous said...

I agree with your view on abortion. No one thinks it is a great idea. I do not hear anyone saying "it is great go have one." I think it is up to the woman that it impacts but I do not want any women to have to make that choice. It was illegal once but that did not stop abortions from happening. It just made them more horrific. I would love to see it unnecessary. The only way that can possibly happen is if birth control is made more available. It should be free. I think pro-life groups should be handing out free birth control in any and all forms.
A little history note when the pill became available a married woman had to have her husband's permission to get it. I would thing that we would be beyond that point in society but we are not and that saddens me. Keep out of my uterus, keep out of my daughter's uterus and I swear I will not bother with your scrotum.

Teacher Amee said...

Not being able to afford birth control, my hubby and I opted to try out natural family planning. Thankfully, it's worked like a charm for us for over 13 years. We have 3 planned kids and it's 100% free. I like saying to hubby, "If you touch me right now, I will be pregnant, so stay away." This is power.

Anonymous said...

I have Von Willebrands (and statistically, so does about 10% of the population). I'm enjoying the side effect of a higher clotting factor thanks to my pills. Not that guys would understand because common wisdom is that anything that smacks of hemophilia only happens to those with Y chromosomes.

The debate sounds like we're all horny teenage girls who "need to be controlled". The prior attack on sex ed in school focused on premarital sex, but forgot that the the same sex ed knowledge carried over as family planning knowledge after marriage.

What gets me with this debate, is that if one religious group can state that they won't cover something because of their beliefs, what's to stop another group from doing the same thing. Can you imagine an employer saying that their health coverage won't cover blood products or pain medication?

Anonymous said...

From my friend who is a nurse - The Mirena does nothing except become a "regular" IUD.. The hormones wear out and it's just a non-hormone based contraceptive. Hope this helps! I have the paraguard and it's good for 10 years

No One Could Make This Stuff Up said...

You know that I love you...and I will stay a loyal reader...but I disagree. The Catholic Church stands firmly against birth control and abortion (whether or not you agree with this stance or ANY stance of the Catholic Church is of no consequence). So, to me, asking the Catholic Church to provide health care that would pay for both of these services for their employees is hypocritical and wrong. I know others disagree, and I am definitely mature enough to get that. But there are a lot of happy children who sit next to me in church that were adopted...and I am thankful for their selfless birth mothers. And there are amazingly wonderful families of 10+ children in my church and those parents are really raising AMAZING young people. But, to each their own! If you have such issues with IUI costs/need for replacement, have the Hubs get a vasectomy. One stop shopping...pricey but permenant!

unplannedAdulthood said...

I need birth control to keep me from getting giant exploding cysts on my ovaries as well as to prevent pregnancy, but I don't have health insurance so I don't have any.


The GOP loves creating welfare babies.

KP said...

AMEN!

unplannedAdulthood said...

What's to stop the Catholic Church from stopping other medications that they don't believe in? Or to stop any church from covering mental health drugs, blood transfusions, etc?

This isn't about medication they don't believe in, this is about the fallacy of being a "whore" or "fallen women."

Women aren't smart enough or capable enough to make their own decisions without being wanton skanks, so men need to put them in their place and punish them.

Mama Bean said...

I think we should set up an all-female congressional panel to discuss what a nuisance Viagara is to society. Let's face it, if there were more limp dicks, there'd be less babies.

Christie said...

What in the hell are these men thinking??? Let's give men access to boner pills but give women nothing!

Anonymous said...

I just got Mirena too and so far it's been great (not such a fan of the breakthrough bleeding, but I hear that stops after a while... please?) When I called my insurance company they said the actual Mirena would be covered at 100% (after co-pay) but the insertion was a "surgery" and was thus subject to my deductible. Huh?! It hurt like a bitch, sure (I haven't had kids yet, so my cervix has no experience being stretched), but come on! If that's a surgery, I have a bridge to sell you. So I went in thinking I'd have to pay about $350 (which is my dr's placement fee) but then I just got my statement of benefits and my insurance covered the whole thing at 100% after co-pay. This is why I hate insurance- nobody can ever tell you what it's going to cost, although I am glad that it was in my favor this time.

And yeah, men need to get the crap out of our uterus! I speak up about it all day, everyday. I sign petitions, I write my senators, I do everything I can, short of picketing in Washington.

Anonymous said...

OH MY GOD!!!! I had that same rant in October...when I got my Mirena out. (I didn't know about the French then...) Since my insurance (and I have good insurance) wouldn't pay for a new one, I decided to try life without. My husband got a vasectomy about 3 years after I got the Mirena, so we don't have to worry about the pregnancy thing. However, I am HATING life with the period again. ICK! It is just so gross. I think I'm going to pay to get another Mirena just so I don't have to deal with this monthly issue. I'll probably spend the same amount over the years anyway in pads, tampons, pain medication, the occasional new pair of undies, etc anyway.

Also, if getting your period were a MAN'S issue, you know a MAN would've found an easy/non-invasive/practical way to get rid of it once you decided that you didn't want kids anymore. (Kind of like a vasectomy...) GRRRR

P.S. Can you tell I'm on my period right now????

Anonymous said...

P.P.S. Oh, yeah...I forgot....when I first got my Mirena the insurance covered the device, but not the insertion. WTF??? It won't do you any good if it's not put it. DUH! Luckily, my doctor coded it as an office visit....

Anonymous said...

Yes, but you are totally missing a couple of points:

1. The ACTUAL church is exempt from this mandate- it only applies to church affliated groups (like hospitals and universities) that employ people from many different faiths and backgrounds. Why does the church have the ability to limit THEIR reproductive rights?

2. Obama just made an exception that these affiliated organizations don't have to be responsible for providing this coverage directly to women- so as to not hurt their draconian policies. The insurance companies will directly approach the women- so now, no problem for the Catholic church.

I am glad that you are happy that people adopted, but come talk to us again when there aren't ENOUGH kids to adopt and people are upset about THAT. At THAT point, you can be "glad" that people gave up babies. Right now, the system is filled to the brim with children that can't find homes...what about those kids??

So Domesticated said...

First of all... enjoy your blog... but with all due respect, I disagree with you. It's not about contraception. It's about religious freedom. The government cannot force religious institutions to mandate something that goes against their teachings. Also, it's not just the Catholic Church that disagrees... but many other branches of Christianity and many of the Jewish faith. If Christian institutions are forced to do so it would go against the Religious Freedom Restoration Act.

I get that birth control is an important topic... it's important to me as well... but it's being pushed to the forefront of this particular issue, by many, to re direct the real issue... freedom of religion.

If one want's to argue that you can't get free birth control... that's just not true. Planned Parenthood helps many women get free contraceptives and if you are charged, it's a very low amount.

lauren said...

Ok I am reading a lot from the women who are pro free pill on here and I would like to be the voice of the opposition. First off, I am respecting your right to say how you feel so please respect mine. I don't think it's fair to jump on the church when all they're doing is trying to uphold their beliefs. I don't see them as behind on the times or backwards. Whatever you want to call it, if the churches started changing their stance on everything just because other people said to then what do they truly stand for anymore? Also, prices are so high with insurance co-pays because doctors have to pay ridiculously high costs in malpractice insurance to save themselves and then make up for it in their office fees which cause insurances to raise their costs as well. I just don't think birth control should be free. We'd all end up paying for it someway or another anyways. Nothing is ever truly free. There are many ways to plan a family without the use of birth control. Sex first and foremost is about procreation. Every time you do it you should at least be open to the idea that you may be bringing a new baby into the world. We have become such a self serving world that we now balk at the idea of what sex is truly about and just see it now as an act to do whenever and with whoever for enjoyment. I don't see it as letting the men dictate how to care for my own body. I see it as them looking out for us. Men are more realistic minded than we are. I am reading through all the comments about how the pill and other contraceptives didn't even work for some of you. Why then are we so adament on getting something for free that may or may not do its job properly? We'll have more people then trying to just use that and nothing else and we'll still probably end up with any number of welfare babies and then yeah, we may have free birth control but we'll all be paying for these babies that other people are having. It's not worth it to me.

So Domesticated said...

*If Christian institutions, as well as other religious institutions are forced to do so it goes against the Religious Freedom Restoration Act.*

Anonymous said...

They want the government to be just small enough to fit inside a woman's uterus.

Ridiculous!

Anne @ The Frump Factor said...

I know this has been said before, but it bears repeating. When will all Viagra users be forced to prove that they need this drug for procreational, not recreational, purposes? On some level, women are being told that it's not OK for us to have sex unless we want children. Interesting that men aren't asked to do the same.

Anonymous said...

Yes, but you are totally missing a couple of points:

1. The ACTUAL church is exempt from this mandate- it only applies to church affliated groups (like hospitals and universities that TAKE PUBLIC MONEY) that employ people from many different faiths and backgrounds. Why does the church have the ability to limit THEIR reproductive rights?

2. Obama just made an exception that these affiliated organizations don't have to be responsible for providing this coverage directly to women- so as to not hurt their draconian policies. The insurance companies will directly approach the women- so now, no problem for the Catholic church.

Finally, if they take public money, they abide by public law...what is so hard about that?? Frankly, if you want true religious freedom- ie a secular government- the religious institutions should not be allowed to TAKE ANY PUBLIC MONEY!

Cheron Tiffany said...

And then, there are the times that the pill is used for no-birth control issues, like cysts and irregular cycles. It's just stupid! And don't forget, you live in Kansas where abortion coverage is not allowed unless you buy a rider. Getting pregnant while raped was equated to getting a flat tire.

Anonymous said...

Omg, I was totally going to reply to this until you started saying shit like "men are more realistic minded than we are." I can't even argue with stupidity. Women like you are what is wrong with our society- thinking we aren't smart enough or realistic enough to run our own lives and that men should be doing it for us. It's sad really that you still think like that.

Also, since you have absolutely NO concept of statistics- let me give you a bit of them to educate you (although I seriously doubt that will help here). When used correctly- hormonal birth control is 99% effective. When used incorrectly, it's a bit less than that. You want to know how effective NO birth control method is for preventing pregnancy? Over the course of one year, if you don't use any protection, there is about a 25% chance of pregnancy. So that is a HUGE difference. You say "we'll have more people just trying to use that and nothing else"...what else is there to use when having sex other than birth control? What world do you live in?? I can tell you this much- it's not a world that is supported by facts or evidence, since none of your statements are. It's fine to have opinions, but don't ask us to respect them when they aren't rooted in evidence AT ALL.

Anonymous said...

You know that just because a woman gets pregnant accidentally that it is going to result in a "welfare baby" don't you? Apparently not. I hope you have never used ANY public system (roads, schools, libraries, etc) in this country because we are all paying for your ass too then, and frankly, I'm tired of paying for stupid people to live here.

Anonymous said...

I'm not saying I agree or disagree with your opinion but I did want to make a clarification. Catholic medical institutions do not allow sterilization procedures to be preformed. That includes vasectomies and tubal ligations.

Anonymous said...

And yet how many people complain about all the "welfare moms" having more kids? Self-serving? Ridiculous.

Midlife Molly said...

The idiots that have been elected by the ultra conservatives in my state (Virginia) are wasting time and money by creating a law saying life begins at conception, women can only get abortions after a vaginal ultrasound, among other things. I cannot believe men do not value the women in their lives. OH wait, if their daughters got pregnant, the men in power would just pay for a trip to a city where it's all legal...Because they can. Canada is looking really good right now.

So Domesticated said...

It still violates church doctrine... therefore his "accommodation" is morally meaningless.

Yes, responsibility is on the insurer... but the president has just ordered private companies to give away a free service... which his health and human services secretary has declared a financial burden.

It goes against the Constitution. It first assaults the free exercise of religion stating that these institutions, because they are not a church, must relent. They have no right to the free exercise of religion, no protection from being forced by the state to issue measures that violate doctrine.

It's indeed still a problem for the Catholic Church... and everyone.

lauren said...

I never said that I was quoting statistics...I was responding to the comments made by others in this blog. My point wasn't that contraception isn't more successful in preventing pregnancy than say unsafe sex, which obviously it is. My point is that there is no 100% prevention (besides abstinence). You are also definitely right that the pill can prevent 99% of pregnancy (WHEN USED PROPERLY) but how many people don't do that. I am trying to point out that in every act of sexual relations that there is a chance of procreation. Instead we want to live in a society with no consequences for our OWN actions, and then when we do mess up, we want SOMEONE ELSE to pay for it. Even if that means stomping on the FIRST AMENDMENT. As a strong and proud woman and mother who doesn't take government handouts, I don't have to defend my self to anyone, but I will engage you in this little debate. No where did I say that men were better than women, or that women needed them to think for us, but I am not going to allow a bunch of man bashing to go on without a response. Men and women need each other, and are there to compliment one another. Let just ask the women who are on their periods right how emotional they are capable of being? Or how RATIONAL they can be at times? But I am sure those last two sentences will be the only two things you will read from this. Again that is not to say that women can't think for themselves...which we ABSOLUTELY can. It is just saying we need to use a little commons sense when talking about ourselves.
Lastly i love how we have gotten off topic here. This is about whether the government can tell religious institutions what they can or can't do. I never would tell someone they can't get contraception, but why do we feel that we are entitled to get everything for FREE!

Janelle Southern said...

I use the Mirena IUD also. My gyno said that theoretically (but has not been tested) as long as it in properly in place it will be effective. So unless it gets pulled out of place you should be just fine. The difference is somewhere between 4 1/2 - 5 years after insertion it runs out of hormones. This means that spotting or even full periods will gradually resume. I had mine replaced at about 4 1/2 years because the low dose of hormones managed fibroids for me which were starting to re-form and cause problems.

No One Could Make This Stuff Up said...

Settle down now there, people. Lots of hatred a-flowin'! I am sorry that I did not make myself clearer in the initial post. I definitely believe the legislation should leave exceptions for use of prescrips (such as BCPs) when needed for MEDICAL purposes. I am so sorry to hear about your cysts...I too fight PCOS. But Catholic organizations, in my belief, should still not have to pay for/provide abortions or birth control pills for the soul purpose of birth control when it goes against church doctrine. I was also very happy with President Obama's concessions regarding churches. And, let's be honest, the Catholic Church has been against abortion and birth control a long time...pretty sure they are not looking to keep you from getting your Z-pack or other meds. Really I do not think this is a personal vendetta aganst modern medicine in general.

I will however take up arms against the "anonymous" statment re: adoption. Seriously? Yes, choose abortion b/c babies are NOT being adopted? Excellent arguing point. Tell that to BOTH of my cousins who were adopted. That's not even an affont against Catholics...that is an affront against ALL children who have been adopted...and parents wanting to adopt. You just never know when the next little "Steve Jobs" is out there, growing in a very worried mother's uterus, waiting for a great home.

Bottomline on all of this: get involved with legislation...let your voice be heard...no matter WHAT side of the vote you are on. It does no good to just bitch and complain after the decisions have been made.

And see....I am not a woman who is not "smart enough or capable enough to make their own decisions without being wanton skanks, so men need to put them in their place and punish them"...I can see both sides of a story and still stand behind my beliefs. AND *gasp* even tell someone struggling with the idea of unwanted pregnancies to have their Hubs look into getting a vasectomy! Yes...amazing, huh?

Jaimee said...

It stops being about religion when a church affiliated organization takes tax payer money. Taxes are paid by many who do not hold the same beliefs, therefore; these types of organizations should play by the same rules. If a church affiliated organization doesn't want to follow government rules, then stop taking public money!

Jaimee said...

I'm not sure why my reply was posted here and not lower. It makes much more sense elsewhere.

T said...

Call around and price shop. Or even see if your doctor's office will put you on a payment plan, or give a cash discount. It will be more expensive because you are having one removed and one inserted, however, the price of them did seem to come down (I know I paid less for my second Mirena than my first.)

imbogus1 said...

It sucks to be man or woman! This county is completely out of control. Who do I have to fuck to get off this planet?

Hawk3ye said...

Great post, Jen! I *DO* think that women are speaking out about this, including as Irishgirlmurphy pointed out, some great women lawmakers including Jackie Spier, Barbara Boxer, Jan Schakowsky, Elizabeth Warren...

I wish you luck on the Mirena situation - I am considering tubal ligation or vasectomy for the hubs myself. I can no longer use hormonal BC because my blood pressure skyrockets. I've been using condoms and female condoms and pretty much not having sex. :(

anna said...

I just had Mirena put in at the end of December and the total charge my doctor billed the insurance company was $1197. Luckily, I only had to pay $25. Sometimes they will give you a discount for cash or you can negotiate to get a better price. After my son was born in October our medical bills (after insurance paid) were almost $3000. We make decent money but I applied for a discount with the hospital and got it reduced by 50%. I know this isn't the reason for your post and is off the subject and I totally agree with what you have posted - but I am tired and don't have the energy to think deeply right now.

Kristen said...

I had a hysterectomy and my husband a vasectomy so any child we might possibly conceive would be nothing short of the second coming of the Savior. That said, I am about to write a check to NARAL right now, having already written one to Planned Parenthood. I am also a Virginia resident and horrified by what is happening on all fronts against women's reproductive health. One more thing is that I volunteer as a Court Appointed Special Advocate and was just assigned a case for an infant put into foster care at birth because her deficient and addicted parents - one of whom has already had other children involuntarily placed for adoption due to abuse - were essentially homeless. Seriously, if you can't afford a place to live, do you think you could afford birth control? But the religious right - most of whom can't keep it in their pants either - say they should practice abstinence. Yeah. That works.

Anonymous said...

I work at a Catholic school, and there's been talk that our health insurance will be pulled because of this. Our bishop actually said that he would pay the fines rather than pay out insurance for his own employees if Obama's plan goes through. That will do nothing but make all the great teachers at our school leave- and then what is being accomplished?

TaraNovyCrawford said...

You could always try contacting Mirena and asking for help. Couldn't hurt to ask! They might discount or provide the IUD and all you'd have to pay for is insertion at your doc's.

Pattyann said...

Why are condoms available for free but birth control can be super expensive? Sounds like something you'd love to debate outside of the current political debates!

PS: I heard once that they made a male BC pill, but it never was marketed because women didn't trust men to take it effectively! So I guess women did have a voice in that contraceptive decision!

Anonymous said...

I had to sign a consent form when my husband had his vasectomy.

Kristen said...

1) the government can tell anyone taking their money what to do. Option B: don't take the government's money. Simple.

2) If you claim the earned income tax deduction or deductions made to charitable causes, you are taking a government handout. If you intend to file for social security or use Medicare, then you will also be taking a government handout.

3) last I checked, having my uterus surgically removed is pretty much a 100% chance of preventing conception, even if I have sex three times a day. It cost me about $2000 after the insurance paid its share.

4) you can go ahead and refuse to have sex with your husband when you can't afford another baby, but when he cheats or leaves you for a woman who will be intimate with him, I'll expect you to be the very first who takes accountability for her actions. Because I disagree with you that sex is "first and foremost about procreation." Sex is about pleasure, or else it wouldn't feel so good. Unless you have another scientific explanation for the clitoris, in which case I'd love to hear it.

4) Last I checked, health insurance cost an arm and a leg, so birth control is not only not "free," but it is far cheaper than the alternative. Our corporate health benefits rep said at open enrollment that the highest cost to the company was NOT cancer or treatment for diabetes or emphysema, but cost associated with premature births. And while many of us have had intended children who happened to be premature (as evidenced by the comments on the Beyonce post), those who take drugs or have unhealthy pregnancies are at high risk for premature birth. Pay now or pay later, because guess what - a lot of those people don't have health insurance and it's mine and yours that covers their expenses.

I am no longer Catholic, thank goodness, but I support Catholics to make their own choices. Presumably, if you are Catholic and working for a Catholic employer, none of this should ever come into play. It's like offering a deaf person a free radio. Why on earth would they ever choose to accept it?

Kristen said...

What's interesting, if you read the history of the birth control pill, is that they worked the sugar pill into the pack so that a woman would still have her period every 28 days and men would NOT SUSPECT that she was preventing pregnancy. As evidenced by pills that now don't include periods, there is no need for that except to keep the right to reproduce entirely in the woman's court. As it should be.

Kristen said...

Planned Parenthood is under target from many of these same people because they provide abortions. Although they are an amazing resource for low-income women who need reproductive health care, including cancer screenings, but cannot afford insurance. We cannot simply say that PP is there and then stand aside as these same lawmakers refuse them funding or release so-called "studies" that result in organizations like Komen blacklisting them (although much of that has since been undone and has ramped up private donations to PP like mine).

Erika said...

Anything and everything will be paid for a man but not a woman. Like Viagra is a necessity! What a joke!

Anonymous said...

Conservatives. Religious leaders. Do they not understand that none of us "like" abortions, but take away our contraceptives and the demand for abortions will skyrocket. These men, generally old and white, are hypocrites. Tell THEM to stick a damned aspirin between THEIR knees!

Anonymous said...

Just because you work for a Catholic institution does not mean you are necessarily Catholic. Take me for instance. I cannot get "reduced" (not free) cost on birth control because I work for the church. I was baptized, completed my first communion and confirmation (all by the age of 12, which is another gripe I have)--but I haven't practiced the faith in quite awhile. I don't think I follow any particular religion, but I do believe in "God" and believe LOVE is at the center of it all.
I think, since I work--not for a Catholic institution--but work period, I should be entitled to "reduced" birth control. Last I checked BC was almost $50 a month for the pill. That was about 10 months ago because I now have a one 1/2 month old. She is the light of my life. But now I would like to enjoy her for awhile AND enjoy my husband without the possibility of getting pregnant. However, I now have to pay $50/a month to do it. My employer DOES indeed take governmental money to stay in business. Seems only fair the government mandate for health care should float. IF there are Catholics working for us that believe it is wrong to take contraceptives 1) I'd like to meet one. ALL and I mean ALL of the Catholic women I work with wish they could get it 2) then simply don't buy it! Let us who are not practicing choose!!

Jean said...

If you leave a comment supporting women's rights, please also write or call your Congressperson. Ask why only women walked out. Ask him, mine's a him, why he didn't walk out. I'm waiting for a reply. I also wrote my Senators to explain what I expect from them as well.

Jaguwar said...

I'm amused to see how often the subject of vasectomies is coming up here.

I'm betting they're covered, but no one's complaining about that. I'm also nearly certain Viagra is covered. No one's complaining there, either.

What we need is an all-women's panel to discuss coverage of vasectomies (must cover, even if you're a Catholic institution, as long as you receive government money), and Viagra (must not be covered if you use government money for healthcare). See how the men like wearing that shoe!

Katie said...

I have paraguard and besides some cramps that really suck - my period is about 4 days with the second day being the worst. I honestly can't complain - much. I'm on a payment plan they offer - like 60 bucks a month for 12 months. I only had to pay for the dr.s appointment upfront.

Anonymous said...

Isnt the idea of the church being affiliated with medicine at all kind of an oxymoron? I mean, Jesus heals. He made blind men see, healed diseases, and provides other medical miracles daily (as shown by numerous tv preachers). My point? For people who believe so.strongly in their faith that they rely on God for birth control, why not rely on Him for ALL medical control? Why pick and choose? Let the rest of us have the freedom to choose the meds just as you have the right tochoose to how you interpret yout religious beliefs

Jaguwar said...

"Ok I am reading a lot from the women who are pro free pill on here"


Ummm... that's not even the issue here, at all. No one is talking about free anything. Last I checked, people with insurance (no matter whether it's group coverage like you get at home, or individual) have to pay some amount out-of-pocket. That's not free at all.

Moreover, group insurance isn't discounted because "the people" are paying for it, either. It's discounted because... well because things bought "in bulk" are always cheaper. Please get informed about how insurance works. Thanks.

Jaguwar said...

Crud, I meant "group insurance, like you get at WORK", not "at home"! LOL Sorry, my brain went on a little vacation there.

Samantha said...

Wow, I think you accomplished your goal Jen, people are definitely talking. Hopefully some women take their concerns to the government because you got this conversation going. I myself live in Canada so I can't really tell you what is right for your country. My mom is from Maine and is still and American citizen and half of my family is American. I am always surprised at how much our countries are alike, and yet very different. Luckily in Canada we have Medicare so doctor visits are free and many things are covered. I had to pay for my IUD this fall because it was not covered by Medicare or my insurance from work. I paid $100. I cannot believe how much and IUD costs in the US. Also, I am thankful that the subject of abortion and reproductive rights are so inflammatory that politicians here stay away from it. I strongly believe that birth control, and education should be freely available. I also believe that if the government has no right to tell religious institutions what they can and cannot do, then religious institutions should have no government support or say in lawmaking. All women in the country should have the same rights and freedoms, no matter what church they attend, or work for. Not all employees at Catholic institutions are Catholic after all.

Megan said...

WOW. First time I've ever completely disagreed with you. When people say that birth control and abortion should be "free" - I shudder. There is no such thing as "free." We are all paying for it in some form (except for those who are dependent on the govt - and therefore the taxpayer) I have several issues with gov't mandates and religious freedom is only the tip of the iceberg for me. If we don't have the right to tell you how to live (ie keep your knees together) then we do you have the right to tell us what we have to pay for?
What if your employer offered you an extra $10,000 a year to go out and shop for your own insurance plan? I'd freaking take it. We are a family who watches what we eat, get plenty of exercise and knows what hereditary issues (high cholesterol and alcoholism) lurk over us. Just like with auto insurance, I would expect my premiums to be lower than the lazy fat ass who visits McD's every day and smokes like a chimney. Unfortunately, since my employer buys for thousands of employees, I pay the same rate as everyone else.
While I applaud Mrs Obama's efforts to educate the common people about eating right and the dangers of obesity, I have serious concerns that gov't run healthcare may put my favorite eating holes (which I only frequent on occasion) out of business.
Get the damn gov't out of my bedroom. I also don't think anyone can expect the Catholic Church (or anyone who claims to be Christian) to pay for abortions (yes - the morning after pill is just that.) They've been perfectly clear on their stance for centuries.
When I donate to my church, I expect that money to go for things within the church's mission. Birth control and abortion are not on that list. If someone wants their birth control covered, find another employer.

Anonymous said...

A. Stop voting these idiots into office B. Men need to take a more active role in birth control if a couple is done having babies. There are surgical options for men and less risk than woman take to ensure they won't become pregnant C. I highly doubt God wants unwanted or uncared for children more than he wants us to procreate. The simple fact is we as a society and we as women continue to make this our issue. Why do we take on the responsibility as our own when it comes to birth control? I am in awe at all the women posting, saying they have no other choice but to shell out the money for an IUD or suffer an unwanted pregnancy. It takes an egg AND a sperm to make a baby. PS yes, that aspirin guy is an ass and should be an example of why birth control should be free to all!

Unknown said...

I for one am tired of paying for other peoples babies that they cannot afford to have. My husband and I work our asses off to pay and take care of the child we have with one on the way. We are planning ahead for when the medical bills roll in from child birth. My husband will have a vasectomy after the 2nd one. (That’s covered) I'm literally tired of hearing about the government paying for kids. A friend of ours when asked how they were going to pay for kids they were planning on having when they both were unemployed for some time, straight up answered the government. THAT'S MY TAX MONEY PAYING FOR YOUR KID!!! I’m tired of hearing I can't afford more kids but I keep having them cause I can't afford birth control and the government (me) will pay for them. If the Government was handing out free birth control instead of free healthcare and welfare There would be a lot less kids to pay for.

J. said...

I couldn't agree with you more- and a lot of these comments as well! I am very pro-choice. I read an earlier comment about abortion that says no one is "for abortion." No one thinks abortion is a great idea...Pro-choice simply means giving women the right to choose what is right for their life and their body. I completely agree with that. In the world of pro-choice, I believe that contraceptive choices are a part of that too- and in the pro choice/pro life debate, doesn't it make sense that if contraceptives (of all kinds) were affordable and available to ALL women, there would be a much smaller number of women feeling the need to choose between having an abortion or carrying a child that they didn't plan for? If we don't have access to affordable contraceptive choices (not just the pill) that just creates situations where parents who simply can't afford another child find themselves expecting anyways, and now need government assistance to care for that child.

Lanae Brown said...

I totally agree. That's the problem with our govt right now, they just keep handing stuff out for free and everyone expects it. Guess how we developed huge national debt?! Enough with the bailouts!

No, birth control should NOT be free! If you don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex! You don't need sex to survive. If you want to have sex, you either pay for the birth control or be prepared for a new baby. I don't eat fast food every day and then expect the government to pay for my gym membership.

Lanae Brown said...

If you can't afford a baby and you can't afford birth control, STOP HAVING SEX!!!

Unknown said...

You don't want or can't afford more kids STOP HAVING SEX until you can get some type of contraception, you don't have to live with an unplanned pregnancy if you are cautious to start with. Is this not what we teach our kids.if you aren't having sex you can't have a baby. Simple as that. I do believe that if birth control is used to treat other illnesses such as cysts then it should be just like every other prescription but if its to prevent pregnancy make it cheaper or free and i'm not saying abortion should be free.

So Domesticated said...

There are other clinics besides PP that offer reproductive health care... I didn't mean to just single them out : ) The Catholic Church and other religious institutions are not prohibiting women from getting birth control, they just don't believe in providing it, as it goes against their church doctrine.... and they aren't trying to stop them if they go elsewhere to get it.

As for the Komen issue... that opens up other things. They are a private organization and if they chose to cut funding to a particular organization or group it is their business. It's a shame they allowed themselves to be bullied into retracting their original decision.

Schemer said...

In addition to this money that these men think we can just pull off of trees to support these kids, pregnancy isn't always just free of complications for women and their babies. Very often, either/or can die during pregnancy/childbirth. So, now, we women need to put our lives at risk? And, yeah, it's easy to say "Don't have sex" but sometimes when women have sex, it isn't by choice. Sexual assaults happen by the minute in this country and a woman already having access to birth control would be very useful in those situations, especially since abortion clinics/providers are getting harder and harder to come by.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Teacher Amee for finally mentioning NFP. Natural Family Planning is TOTALLY FREE and 99% effective at preventing pregnancy if done correctly. There is nothing more feminine than being in tune with your own body and knowing your cycle. Being able to openly communicate that with your husband honestly brings you closer together. If you are fertile, then he should respect you and understand when it is "get it on time" and when it is "cuddle time". Sometimes I even think my husband knows my cycle better than I do! My husband and I just downloaded the FREE app for charting...YES, there's an app for that!
http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/nfp-charting/id300767738?mt=8

Anonymous said...

Preach it!

Jessica Johnson said...

WELL SAID!!! Unlike many of your critics, I enjoy “spending time” with my husband. I don’t want kids any time soon and “not spending time” with my husband is NOT an option. “If you don’t want kids you shouldn’t have sex” is only appropriate advice for high school girls, not married, well-educated, career women.

Moira Incendia said...

Natural Family Planning is great, but does NOT work for those of us who don't have a regular cycle. I have endometriosis, and have been on birth control since I was 12 and started my periods as a result. My cycle, even on the Pill, is so irregular it is IMPOSSIBLE to say when it's going to start. I've been on the Depo for almost 5 years now, because nothing else worked and IUDs are not approved for women who have not already had a child. Last time I tried to get off the shot and back on the Pill, I went from a relatively normal woman to a raging, hormonal nightmare. I bled for 3 to 4 days at a time, with 2 to 3 days off, for almost 6 weeks before they could get me back on the shot and my system settled back down. NFP would be great, but until a solution is found for endometriosis, I'll stick with my shot every 3 months. Thanks.

MICHELE said...

Ok so I live under a rock and seldom turn on my tv, but if I am understanding this correctly this is coming from conservative rep?! which oddly enough I thought I was. However, I too am disgusted to think they are trying to choose what birth control coverage I get. Lucky for me my hubs got the snip snip, but that is besides the point.
1. What is wrong with these morons no one said that you HAD to take birth control if it is against your moral belief system, don't punish those of us who find birth control acceptable.
2. Planned Parenthood does offer "free" or sliding scale birth control to everyone however, I can't tell you have many low income single moms out there said if they would pay to have them "fix" (their words not mine) they wouldn't have had their last 1-2 kids!! Really?! More kids on welfare for me to support.
3. Bottom line how is this different than saying "hey diabetics, we have decided that we are no longer covering your meds, just cuz we have some religious views on that...you don't pick and choose my already poor health coverage.

Moira Incendia said...

I disagree with you on the morning after pill. It was given to me when I was raped, and I am incredibly grateful for it. It wasn't an abortion, it was a way to make sure I didn't have to see my rapist's features in my child's face.

Anonymous said...

I, too, believe we should have universal healthcare. Unfortunately, the people of this country as a whole have a mentality that paying taxes is bad. It's why so many people oppose universal healthcare--our taxes would go up but people are not thinking about the overall advantage to our country. Makes me sad.

3shortiesplus1 said...

I'm with you on this! I couldn't believe the "panel" they lined up to discuss this issue. I'm Catholic and I'm totally embarrassed that this has become basically a fight between my church and the government. Hey, if you are willing to accept federal money, then you have to play by their rules. It's simple. And besides that, every Catholic woman I know who is my age (42) or younger is or has been on birth control at some point. The Catholic church is so out of touch with their congregation. I wish they'd fight for the poor and hungry with as much vigor as they are for this issue that takes away women's rights. Ahhhhhhh!

Anonymous said...

Please, all you people who are complaining about how you had a surprise baby while on any type of birth control (I've seen you all mention every single kind here), please explain to me how government issued free birth control (which will not be free--someone, us, has to pay for it) will help with your unplanned pregnancies that you had while you were on birth control? I'm confused.

suzzsuki said...

That is absolutely NOT true, Anonymous. I just had a tubal ligation in a Catholic hospital. I have also worked in another Catholic hospital where they also did tubals.

Anonymous said...

my priest said during mass today that this was not a war on womans rights.. funny because everyone making a big deal out of this is a white old man. it just disgusts me that 99% of catholics use birth control, yet everyone makes a big deal out of this! EVERYONE IS USING IT. i don't understand. plus, i take the pill because i get so sick when i'm on my period that i throw up and i can barely move and the pill has completely eliminated this!! i don't understand the problems with birth control.

Kelly said...

Thank you! Every comment above that said "don't have sex if you don't want to have a baby" made me want to scream! As a married woman, NOT having sex just because we're not ready for a baby (financially and emotionally) Just isn't an option.

What do you think would happen to the divorce rate if married couples stopped having sex except for the times they were trying to conceive? Don't have sex is the worst argument for this debate I have ever heard!

Lizzz said...

Love love love my Paragard!

Anonymous said...

Anon...that is ridiculous! The same God that helped blind men see is helping blind men see today through miracles such as LASIK and other treatments. GOY

Anonymous said...

Exactly. Out of touch is why they are losing parishioners left and right. They need to live in the 21st century. They have changed the Catechist in the past. The Pope has changed decrees before. And again, if the Church accepts from the government, it seems like this is not too much to ask in return.

MDubs said...

Absolutely agree here...few to no side effects and not nearly as much pain as childbirth. Time for men to STEP UP!

Anonymous said...

I for one do not want the government in charge of my healthcare and it has nothing to do with paying taxes. It has to do with the government fucking up everything they touch. Medicare? Social security? Welfare? Ask a member of the military how much they love their healthcare. Talk about taking away choices. No thank you. I will pay for the health insurance and at least have somewhat of a choice in the matter. It's not perfect but it's a whole lot better than giving up all control to the government.

Anonymous said...

Any person, man or woman who would dare try to tell me what to do with MY body would get a punch in the throat. I strongly feel that the government needs to stay out of the health care issue completely. I feel as though all companies needs to be responsible enough to cover the costs of birth control ... there are enough unplanned/unwanted pregnancies. The cost to cover birth control is far less than the cost to cover a birth & hospital stay. Women all over should be outraged & should be opening up their mouths.. & to the moron who said "put an aspirin between our knees".. go f*** off!!!

The Queen of Everything (Else) said...

whether you take a pill or have an abortion, you and only YOU are the one that has to deal with it. Not your partner, not your mother and certainly not some "law" MAN.

Anonymous said...

I also LOVE my paragaurd! The heavier periods kinda suck but the "no hormone" aspect actually helps a lot with the sex drive. Mine was negative on any kind of hormone birth control.

mrskristinmoore said...

I totally agree.. I guess people feel like we are taxed to death already. But I think a wniversal healthcare would be amazing and end up saving us so much in the long run

Anonymous said...

Condoms are free in every health clinic. There really is no excuse for someone to be on welfare and have 9 kids by 4 different fathers.

DeAnna said...

my private insurance is already doing what's stated above. It's not an ala carte service and last time i checked my private insurance went up 18% just because government gets involved doesn't make us socialists

Anonymous said...

I never said "Yes, choose abortion b/c babies are NOT being adopted?" I just said that you are glad women are having all these babies for adoption but do you even care about the children who are suffering without families? Your solution is to force every woman who has an abortion to have a pregnancy which can have many, many life threatening complications so that she can give the baby up for adoption to add the HUGE amounts of children waiting to adopted. The fact that you can't see that as just as ridiculous as what you *think* I said (but never *actually* said) is where you are being ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

I think the basic issue is responsibility. BCP aren't just for birth control, they are also used for other medical reasons and I believe insurance should pay for them like any other medication. My stance is that people have to take control and responsibility for their health care. People demand free medical care and are constantly complaining they can't afford it...isn't health as important as cell phone service or internet service? you won't die from lack of internet or cell phone. Seriously, we have to start budgeting for our health care and treating it like an unavoidable monthly expense. Those who can't afford it should be helped but that is what public assistance is for. Condoms might not be pleasant, but if you don't have health insurance...get yourself a $10 box of condoms for goodness sake! Those are free at your local health department by the way. We are forgetting how spoiled we are in this country. People who can afford cable, cell service, internet and other luxury items can afford to put aside money for health care. You know if people could only get public assistance for one child in a lifetime and for a limited time, say a year, most of this issue would go away. Trust me, cut off the free ride for multiple kids, and some people would stop using it as a form of income. Enough is enough. That said, I agree that church and state don't mix. Religion has no business influencing politics in this country. We are too diverse a culture for that. Our tax dollar supports the Church..unless the Churches want to start paying income tax like any other business, they need to follow the laws like everyone else. If they don't believe in it, stop taking the American tax dollar to support themselves! I'm sick to death of my taxes going towards an institution that wants to ban things many of us don't believe in banning. Those who ask why should the Church be forced to support things against their beliefs should ask why all of tax paying America should have to support their beliefs? They prosper tax free and religion is a big business with billions of taxable dollars!! You can't have your cake and eat it too people. I'm not aware that God has a checking account or the need for all that money. The word of God can be taught at home for free. This is a money issue period. It might come wrapped in religious or political wrapping paper, but it's all about money.

Anonymous said...

So Domesticated: If they don't have to provide it, I still don't see how it goes against church doctrine. That's like saying they are personally affronted that any woman any where is being provided by birth control. The Catholic church has been taken out of the equation- the insurance company is the one that is being forced to provide it and to reach out. So you can claim that the accommodation is "morally meaningless" but your claim is bullshit.

Anonymous said...

I'm normally a republican voter as well but I am absolutely horrified by the current pick of candidates. Between this issue, gay marraige and my hate of Obama, I think I'll be staying home on election day because I don't want any of them.

Bug said...

Agreed! I'm in Virginia and am appalled at the legislation being passed. Requiring a transvaginal ultrasound? Really? So you want to penetrate me against my will to look at a 'baby' that was also put there against my will (or however)? Terrible. If the right hates abortion so much, fund birth control! It would reduce unwanted pregnancies=less people on WIC/Medicaid/Food stamps/etc. No man can understand the emotion associated with these issues. Women should be the only people able to make laws regarding women's health.

Tammy said...

depends on the hospital. When out youngest was born we had a choice between two hospitals, one Catholic one not.

We were informed the Catholic hospital does not do tubals or vasectomies so we went with the other hospital out of principal.

Anonymous said...

Why aren't asking more women upset with GOP candidate Rick Santorum's comments on women, rape, and pregnancy? He has stated that women who become raped should make the best of a bad situation and consider no option other than raising the baby. This douche canoe is giving chucklhead Mitt Romney a serious run for his money in the primaries. If douche canoe becomes the candidate against Obama you would think someone so radical would not win but not unless people's voices are heard. I am a man, but I am husband to a wife, a son to a mother, a brother to 2 sisters and aspirin asshole and sack of shit santarom piss me off. So, I know they must piss women off in that deep soulful angry way adele is always carrying on about! Let's get fired up! Or if santorum wins I that this Afghanistan war veteran and his family are goingthe to move to Barbados (let's face it-its a little more original than stomping off to canada, it is chill without being chilly, and it is actually a different country, not America Lite!)

Anonymous said...

Lauren, you did say that "men are looking out for us" and that they "are more rational". Both of which is not true here. And I love how you think the fact that women have mood swings makes them irrational. Don't you think a man's tendency to not ask for help makes him irrational? Don't you think the fact that men focus on sex a lot more than women can affect their "rationality". I bet not, since, in your world view, only men can be rational and women are just emotional creatures subject to the whims of their hormones. Sure, we do need men, I'll give you that. But I don't need them telling me what I can and can not do with my body. Maybe you do, and that's fine. I'm glad you have one to be your more rational side. The rest of us do fine making our own rational decisions. In which case, did you ask your man before you posted your opinion here? Maybe it isn't "rational" enough.

And yes you are right. This is about the fact that the Catholic church doesn't have to directly offer contraception to women...the insurance company does. So again, no problem with the first amendment here.

Anonymous said...

Kristin, I pay into Medicare and Social Security out of every one of my paycheck so they don't really qualify as a "handout". Also, the head of household and other tax credits just mean that you get more of your money back that you paid into the system. It doesn't come out of thin air. lol And the original poster never said don't have sex with your husband. She said if you do have sex you should be prepared for possible consequences including having a baby.

Pepper said...

I don't honestly think the periods are "heavier," or that cramps are "worse," if you're healthy, they're just normal. I think you need to have regular periods for physical health and not play games with hormones. If you have another GYN issue going on, that's a different story.

Anonymous said...

Obviously you missed the point. Guess you think all types of science are modern miracles? How about stem cell research? The use of lab rats? Medicine to help women conceive? Viagra? Does your church frown on all that too or just the part about birth control?
These scientific things seem to be considered miracles only when it's ok to the person who needs it. My point...if we are all living according to Gods plan we would not seek these scientific answers when we fully trust his plan. Sure you can mix science and religion, but don't point your finger and tell me I'm wrong when billions of other "church-goers" and "believers" do the same.

Anonymous said...

The only solution in cases like that are forced sterilization. Because lets face it, she's not going to take a birth control pill anyway. But that's a whole nother issue to argue about...

Bee's hive said...

I've been suffering from endometriosis for most of my adult life. When I finally had a really great MALE doctor say "No that kind of pain is NOT normal...we need to check this out" This is after years of a woman gyno telling me to suck it up basically, stop being a wimp. After the laparoscopy they found my insides covered with brown goo...yep endometriosis. The only way to stop it from destroying my quality of life with debilitating cramps and ovarian cysts that decided to burst at interesting times, was hormone therapy- birth control pills. I say all the men who are on this F'ing bandwagon should stand in a line and allow us to throw maxipads at them.

Anonymous said...

I don't think that is accurate. If the Mirena returned to a 'non-hormonal' state, you would menstruate again.

Anonymous said...

I completely agree with you. It is unconstitutional to require Catholic Hospitals/ Institutions to provide birth control when it is against their church doctrine. And you had better believe that if this were a Muslim or Buddist ideology being attacked, that they would not be doing it. Its apparently acceptable to dismiss the Catholic churches beliefs. And I am not Catholic- and I belive in birth control!

Lanae Brown said...

If you can't afford/don't want a baby right now, fine, but then you better be able to buy your own birth control. Don't tell me you want free birth control, those are the people I'm talking too.

Chip said...

This mandate is about more than just getting the Catholic Church to pay for birth control. It's about taking away our freedoms. Everyone should be concerned about this. I am not a crazy conservative, but I am a conservative and I totally support the teachings of the Catholic Church. I live my faith otherwise why call myself a Catholic?

Anonymous said...

Jenn,

you're losing me with political views and non-lesbian girl crushes.....lesbian girl crushes I understand but non-lesbian girl crushes are just creepy....I read your blog to laugh at your sarcastic humor.....not hear that you want to force people to do things that go against their religious beliefs and have a crush on Tina Fey

Brandi said...

Let's use some common sense here. What costs more, contraception or a child who receives government funded food and insurance? Oh, and if the parents do not want the child that resulted from the unwanted pregnancy, the child is at risk for neglect or abuse. In the end, contraception IS cheaper than unwanted/unplanned pregnancies, and the people who are bitching about not wanting to pay for contraception should make sure that they go adopt all those kids in the foster care system that will result from the nonsense of making contraception unaffordable and unattainable.

So Domesticated said...

Anonymous (The one that states my claim is B.S.). Yes, insurance companies are the ones providing for the Birth Control. However, as it stands this plan forces all companies and institutions to have health insurance, or add to their existing polices the provisions of this new health care bill or pay a very large sum to opt out. So either way people are being forced to accept it. The fact that all are cornered into making one of these less desirable decisions is not fair. It forces all religious institutions who do not opt out to accept that birth control is allowed, or at the very least that this option is provided. It in turn, bisects the religious ethics and morals of the faith (Christian, Muslim, Judaism, etc). There is no Faith out there stating, "Here you either accept this or that, and if you don't we are going to force you into a decision anyway", and then try and impose their will on the entire country. There are currently plenty of options for all women to receive birth control should THEY choose to do so. With the new health care bill, this forces institutions like the church to include birth control in THEIR health plans and therefore causes conflicts with faiths that do not condone birth control. That alone is very wrong, especially in a country that touts itself as one that provides Freedom of Religion, but yet wants to impose mandated bills that go in direct conflict of religion. I respect your opinion. I do not agree with it. Hopefully opinion will not be mandated too...

Anonymous said...

As an eight month pregnant woman, I wouldn't wish this on anyone who didn't want it. Thank God for Planned Parenthood back in my college days when I didn't have health insurance.

Jessica said...

Here we are, men debating and passing laws about what constitutes a human being and "murder" while troops are shooting civilians overseas and getting away with it. If you're pro-life, it has to be ALL life. You can't be pro-life and pro-war.

You also can't take away free birth control and then complain about all of the families on food stamps and welfare. Before you know it, all the drug addicts will get knocked up and there will be children with serious health problems and retardation in foster homes and orphanages that the state will have to pay for.

This is all going to be the downfall of mankind. The earth is going to get so full we'll all be living in cardboard boxes taped together.

Alicia said...

Saturday night live covered it!!

Lanae Brown said...

Bottom line: government should stay out of health care all together. Because I'll be damned if my tax dollars are going to pay for someone else's birth control when they can just close their legs! Let's reform welfare too so that everyone actually has to take responsibility for and pay for their own children. Enough of this, "pay for my birth control or pay for my welfare child". Bullsh*t!

No One Could Make This Stuff Up said...

NEVER said anyone was "WRONG"...for the record. Just expressed my opinion. I have friends from EVERY ethnicity and religion...guess what? We all get along LOVELY. Know why? Because we agree to disagree sometimes.

*Catholic Church does NOT rely on God being in charge of birth control. They support natural family planning. Does it work for everyone? No. Not me at least...so you are barking up the wrong tree with that. I support OTHERS' choice to USE that method though. I know it is amazing to think that I am opposed to legisation orginially dicussed...but I am a free-thinking Catholic who is secure enough in her faith and God to choose a path that fits MY family.

And I guess you think all modern day science is NOT "modern mirales"?? Really? The fact that that scientists can see stars that are billions of light years away...can isolate an atom...can provide bone marrow transplants to save the lives of sick people...yep..I AM going to call them "modern day miracles"..because they ARE indeed scientific break throughs that could not have have happened 2000 years ago.

Stem cells...I agree...a very sesnsitive topic. THAT I CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF. However, since I am a Catholic that struggled with infertility and went through *gasp* IVF x2 and frozen embryo transfers x2...well, I hope you can understand how hard it would be for me to 100% support stem cell research with enbryos. I mean, I DO have living, breathing, pretty AWESOME kids from those "stem cells". Otherwise...have at it! Word on the street is that embryos are not the only place to build amazing stem cells. Advance medicine...save lives...both moms and babies...it's kind of what God wanted us to do, right?? Again...I am just a Catholic speaking out..who I think does a pretty good job of seeing both sides of the story. There may NEVER be a "right" answer. Just stand for something...fight for something.

sheshe said...

I am Catholic. I have been on birth control for 18 years. Bring it on Bishops. First, it was medical and now it is because we responsibily decided that we want only 1 child. Want to tell ME I am no longer welcome back to church?

I don't understand how you can refuse to allow insurance companies to pay for contraceptives but also wage such a war against abortion. Seems counter-productive, doesn't it? I am also very curious to see if these same insurance companies will cover a vasectomy operation. It is the male birth control...

sheshe said...

Lanae - let's get our facts straight before we start making comments about your tax dollars and women "keeping their legs shut." The Catholic Church is protesting the fact that a female employee at a Catholic church, school, affiliation, etc should be able to receive contraception as part of their covered health plan because contraception is against Catholic law. This means MARRIED and unmarried employees. As a married woman, I should not have to keep my legs shut. Hell, no one should be told that since they are trying to be responsible by taking birth control in the first place.

Nothing about this arguement is based on welfare or other publically-funded health plans, so please explain how you feel your tax dollars are at stake here? The arguement against the Catholic Church is that they should not be allowed to decide what ailments/illnesses are covered for an employee because that employee may not be Catholic. For example, you don't have to be Catholic to teach at a Catholic school, but they can still deny you prescription coverage of your contraceptive. Do YOU want that kind of infringement on your rights? How would you feel if your employer denied you that kind of coverage...

maarmie said...

You think the US has huge national debt because of government handouts to the poor? I suggest you educate yourself.

maarmie said...

I suggest you spend a little time figuring out exactly what your tax dollars currently ARE being used for. I think you'd be similarly outraged. Interesting and sad that the people who need birth control the most are the ones who can't afford it. If you want to live in a society, you should probably open that mind a little bit and learn about social issues. Or you could always go into the hills and live off the grid so you don't have to worry about who's paying for those pesky poor people (and their children) to help them survive. You, and people like you, are what keeps America way behind the times in some respects and out of touch with reality.

Anonymous said...

I never realised that that you had to pay and pay so much for your contraceptive in America. I'm British and recently had a coil/IUD fitted, it's non-hormonal lasts 10 years and didn't cost me a thing. It's disgusting that you guys have to pay for something that should be free to all.

joboosal said...

That's just fucking great! My mirena expires in May and from what i am reading the price has gone waaaaay the fuck up - sigh! I'm 45, no more babies for me, can't take the pill cos I'm too freakin old LOL Looks like its time to do a little research, check my insurance website & call my gyno for an appt. DOUBLE SIGH. If my husband had just had the vasectomy like he said he would 2 freakin years ago.....

Anonymous said...

I agree mostly with your article. I am so irritated that most companies look at birth control as a luxury not a necessity. I, too, had to pay 100% of my IUD. My employer wouldn't pay a cent, which in the long run, would be cheaper than the pill over the 5 year course. My issue is the government making anyone cover something because they give money. I don't think we should start letting the government control every aspect of an organization, because they help with funds, like tax breaks. That would give the government too much power. But I do think a law should be passed that insurance companies and businesses cannot treat birth control as though it is a luxury like botox. My whole issue with the government stepping in, was that they not only wanted religious organizations to offer birth control, but pay 100% of it. That is wrong. It should have a co-pay just like any other medication, where generic is a very low deductible. I used to pay $10 for my cheap pills, and I think that is reasonable. And that was after we fought our company who decided to not cover birth control. We won.

Anonymous said...

if you choose to use birth control, do not work for a Catholic affiliated organization. that is your right. It is my right to not pay for your birth control as I view it as morally wrong. Most birth control actually allows fertilization, thus life to form, and then aborts it by making the lining of the uterus unable to allow implantation. I view this as wrong, and your insistence that it is wrong.
Please stop making this an attack on men as that is ignorant. You simply don't seem to understand the importance of particular topic to the Catholic Church and are ignorant of the teachings.

Lanae Brown said...

I'm already outraged with what unnecessary things my tax dollars go towards. But it's ridiculous that so many have commented here that "they should pay for my birth control or pay for my welfare child." No, you should pay for your own stuff. If you can't afford it, then you shouldn't have sex! I'm all about helping people who really need it, but there are too many who are taking advantage of the system and receiving assistance when they don't really need it. My cousin saw someone pay for groceries with food stamps and then drive off in a brand new Audi SUV. Another friend saw someone use an assistance check for groceries and then the cash they got back went for beer and cigarettes. My husband hired someone who worked for two weeks, then stopped showing up. He was fired and simply went and collected unemployment for 6 months. I know people who use food stamps but then have cable and internet service in their home. Too many of my tax dollars are going towards people like that, and if that makes me behind the times, then so be it. Maybe I will head for the hills, at least no one will be telling me how I will spend my hard-earned money!

Anonymous said...

I don't think Men should have any say in what a woman does with her reproductive system. And if they pass some kind of law stating that we can't protect ourselves from getting pregnant, then women should have the right to tell men that they can't masturbate. What about all of THOSE potential babies that they're tossing away? Who's standing up for those babies? No one because men find that argument ridiculous.

As for the adoption option....ask a woman that has been raped and a child resulted from that. She didn't want that child, didn't plan for that child, she doesn't even know who the father is except that he is a violent pig. Now she has to carry this child for 9 months and be violated all over again. Granted it is not the child's fault and I'd be the first in line to say that. But neither is it hers. Would you ask her to let herself be violated all over again after being raped, which is horrific enough? Yes, she could take birth control but if you want to take that option away what does she have left to protect herself? Yes there are thousands of parents waiting to adopt a baby. My sister in law and her hubby wanted to adopt. To adopt a child in the US versus where they went or my nephew, it would have cost them about 90k more than it did. What if couples can't afford to adopt? They resign themselves to the fact that they cant have children. in this economy there are more and more people that can't afford to have or adopt children. So the orphanages are becoming over crowded. Would you add to that problem?

The church arguing against what their healthcare will cover is ridiculous as well. Just because it is covered does not mean you have to use the service. If you take/use insurance from the government you have to accept what is covered without complaint. Just because the church doesn't want those services doesn't mean that someone who is on medicaid doesn't want some form of birth control. Take it away, the system will be inundated with more kids to pay for. When I left my ex husband 8 years ago, I came home to my family and I was on medicaid for a little bit until I found a job with benefits. I can assure you that not every person on assistance is lazy and just wants to pop out more kids. There are a lot that DO do that, but not everyone.

My point in this whole thing is that I have never believed that a man has the right to tell me what I can and cannot do with my body. Nor does a man have the right to tell my daughters. Men should keep their noses out of women's issues and work at the mess they have made of the government. Leave our bodies to us. Either that or find a way for men to carry the babies. That will solve the whole issue as men couldn't handle the monthly "friend", the discomforts of carrying a baby, and the pains of child birth. Men are wusses and they know it.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you Brandi. Look at all the kids that have literally gotten thrown away because they were not wanted. Granted most of that was done by teenagers, but my point is that if you force someone to be unprotected (because even MARRIED women use birth control to stop from having children they can't afford)then complain about all the kids on welfare is a contradiction. My nephew was adopted by my SIL and BIL from overseas (because to adopt here it was approx 90k more. His biological mother was an alcoholic and a drug addict. She continued to use while she was preggers with my nephew, who has some health issues and some serious behavioral issues because of it. FAS is nothing to laugh at let me tell ya! She got preggers with him because her country does not pay for birth control. When she gave birth to him she promptly dumped him on the stoop of the orphanage and left him there. Outside. With no blanket. In September. Her country is VERY COLD. She didn't even knock on the door of the orphanage. Just left him there. Thankfully it was time to check the mail or he would have froze to death. You are right that contraception is cheaper than supporting an unwanted baby. If those that are bitching disagree with the whole thing so bad, then they should come up with the money to adopt all those kids in foster care and orphanages and take them into their homes. Right on girl!!

Marcella said...

Exactly this! I have to laugh at the "Just don't have sex!" mentality. Really? Cuz' that is working out so well these days. It's like a fat person going to Weight Watchers metting just to hear: "Just stop eating!"

Yeah, super helpful and reasonable.

Lanae Brown said...

If the government takes control of healthcare, then yes, my tax dollars probably will end up paying for someone's birth control. Too many people here are saying that birth control should be free, no it should not. Nothing is free. If it's free, it will probably end up being paid for by tax money.

Why does everyone think that just because you're married, someone else should pay for your birth control or your unplanned child should then be on welfare? Since when did we stop taking responsibility for our own actions?

And yes, the Catholic Church has every right to decide what is covered. Because a pregnancy is not an "ailment/illness", so birth control is not a necessity. I know that there are cases where a woman needs birth control for a medical condition, and those should be dealt with case by case. But what happened to religious freedom? Now the government is telling the Catholic Church that they can't exercise their beliefs? I'm not Catholic and I'm not opposed to birth control, but I am opposed to the government telling everyone what to do.

Everyone still has the freedom to choose where they work! So if you don't like the insurance plan, find a different job!

Marcella said...

Then stop reading it. Pretty simple solution.

Mary IronMatron said...

The MAN needs a vasectomy. That is the answer... in answer to your birth control conundrum.
Let his body fucked with for once in order to prevent an unwanted pregnancy, that is what I say. I say that lovingly, of course... :)

Kristen said...

Sure there is, anonymous. Because the man won't put it on, because the woman can't get to a health clinic, because the clinics are being picketed and shut down by the religious right, because funding is being cut, because condoms fail especially when not used properly, because condoms expire and break if not stored properly, and because people JUST DON'T LIKE THEM and think they won't get pregnant for some other reason. I'd bet a small fraction of women here use condoms as birth control and even smaller know where their local health clinic is, and yet we expect the poor, illiterate and addicted to do so.

Kristen said...

Yes, you pay into those things, which are intended to be subsidies for those at or near a poverty level. http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/12/us/even-critics-of-safety-net-increasingly-depend-on-it.html

And Jen's whole point is that she cannot afford another baby, and the opponents to birth control are recommending that she simply not have sex, so are you arguing in a circle? It seems to me that there are few good options for those who get pregnant at the wink of an eye: conceive a baby you cannot afford to raise, pay through the nose for birth control even if it means taking food out of your children's mouths, or don't have sex with your husband. The OP said that every time you have sex you should be prepared for having a baby - which follows that if you don't want a baby ... what? Have a sexless marriage?

Kristen said...

Theoretically, yes ... but "keep the government out of my uterus" doesn't translate too well to forced sterilization. Government is corrupt enough as it is without it being the governing body as to whether or not we are allowed to have children. I really don't think that would go over well with either the liberals or the tea partiers.

Kristen said...

I have a friend whose sister got pregnant at 16 while in (Catholic) high school. Her school advised her to keep the baby rather than give it up for adoption and go on welfare. I really don't understand the Catholic church - men and women who are sworn to remain abstinent throughout life are the ones giving advice about marriage and sex; people whose monetary needs are taken care of by the church advising children how to finance their futures. It's crazy.

Jensational said...

Lanae you and are absolutely right. These liberal women are aren't going to understand that birth control and pregnancy are their responsibility not the government 's. I thought I had found a great bog here but now I see what im dealing with here : a bunch if whiny women who want the government to provide everything at the expense of everyone else. Its not my job ti keep you lazy bitches from getting pregnant or to pay for your abortions or your mortgages because y'all are too irresponsible to keep yourselves in check. So because you get pregnant easily its the job of the insurance companies and your employer and the feds and me to make sure you don't get knocked up?? Well fuck YOU! I've seen the writer of this blog print some funny shit but its the bullshit and lies I can't take reading anymore. Guess I wont be a subscriber anymore. Anyone that would accept government provided anything over their constitutional rights -and that's exactly what the bishops were fighting about- does not deserve to live in thus wonderful country. I am really disappointed in you Jen. But I guess I should have realized this about you when you said the huffpo wants to start carrying your shit.

Jensational said...

War on women my ass. This is exactly what the liberals in DC are trying to do and you all are falling for it hook line and sinker

Anonymous said...

Ladies I'm 23 yrs old, I have one daughter. Since I have had her I have been on the states insurance aka womens uninsured health insureance thru dfs. I can qualify for more than that but I choose not to. It pays for (Completely!) All birthcontrol and paps once a year. I am single and do not wish to have a baby I can't afford to take care of since the first dad dcoesnt help at all! I am on the depo shot, I get it every 3 months and don't have to worry about a thing, some say women gain weight on it but I'm living prrof that's not always true I still way the same I did when I was 15 and I have been on the depo for 7 years. The uninsured womens health insurance covers women from age 18 to 55. I have never had to pay for the depo and honestly I don't think I should have to when the worlds maximum capacity was 1 billion and we hit 7 billion last year. All these welfare moms should have a hystorectomy and be done with it seeing as our government and us can't afford to support them. I've met women who have kids just so they don't have to go to work and they can be on welfare. I hate women like that and strongly support birthcontrol!

Janel said...

I dont get it and won't ever get it why you people are so afraid of public health care. Its NOT going to affect the restaurants you eat at. I also dont get why, whenever there's elections activity, religion and Roe vs Wade are always an issue. Church and State should be VERY separate things. Picking a leader of your country should not be based on his/her faith and his/her position on abortion. It should be based on how they lead your country and how they plan to lead your country out of the giant mess you are currently in and help rather than hinder progress. I just dont get it. A crapload of bible pounders with wierd right wing thinking are destorying your country not just women's rights.

maarmie said...

I agree that misuse of public funds and benefit fraud is bullshit. But don't be down on everyone who needs help because of the few who misuse the system. There are a lot of genuinely needy and struggling people out there who have endured some serious shit. Your attitude suggests you have no clue what that serious shit could possibly be. It's society's doing and society's problem. Innocent children cannot be left to suffer only to repeat cycles of the past. I think welfare is only a band-aid after the big fall down the mountain. True change will only come when there is no more poverty, no more abuse, no more discrimination, a priority on access to good education for all and fair and living wages. It is your problem, it is my problem, it is the government's problem.

maarmie said...

Oh, and true change will only come when there is strict government control on how much profit companies are allowed to make. Take away the choking corporate greed, and suddenly products (birth control included) are a lot more affordable. Capitalism only works for the "haves." Oh, and you seriously have an issue with people on benefits having cable? Sounds like one of the absolute cheapest forms of entertainment to me. And, Lanae, you know what happens when those scumbags don't have something mindless to occupy their feeble minds. They start drinking and they fuck like rabbits. There! The problem is made worse! Someone needs to burst your bubble.

Anonymous said...

The government does not pay for my healthcare. I pay for my healthcare. I cannot stand this argument getting so warped. It's not about tax payer dollars. My insurance company is a private, very profitable company. I expect my medical needs to be covered because they are medically important not because they involve any one else's political or religious views. How would people feel if the pervading political and religious views believed in NO medical intervention for anyone. Would their religious views be ok for you and your family? Not unless you support that belief. That would include no prenatal care, diabetes care, cancer treatments, but hey it's someone else's religious view so I guess we all have to follow their beliefs. No thank you.

Jensational said...

@maarmie: spoken like a true Marxist. Put a limit in how much profit you can make?? WOW....just wow!

maarmie said...

I'm American but now live in the UK. My British husband had a vasectomy after our daughter was born. On the NHS. Completely free. Well, of course it's not free. Tax dollars pay for it. But everyone has access. It's such a beautiful thing. Too bad the NHS is under threat. It's the most wonderful thing i've ever seen (aside from my daughter, of course!).

Lanae Brown said...

OH MY GOD! Yes, birth control IS a luxury! You don't NEED to have sex to survive. You CHOOSE to have sex so its up to YOU to provide the birth control!!!!!!

Lanae Brown said...

Really, now we're going to limit how much profit a company can make? So when Ford sells their 1 millionth car for the year, every one gets laid off until next year? Good plan, I'm sure that will help our social system.

I do know what serious shit is going on, that's why I said I'm all for helping out the people who really need it, but the system as it currently is, is enabling far too many people who aren't working hard. How do you think our country got into this big mess? An ungodly national debt, poor economy - all because we're too ready to hand out money. The government hands out assistance to everyone, banks give out loans to everyone and now we're in an economic crisis. Let's reform some crap and get back on our feet, or it's only going to get worse.

And seriously, you don't have a problem with people on assistance having cable? A basic cable package where I'm from is about $50 a month, that can go a long way for food. Last time I checked, cable for everyone is not in the Bill of Rights, so it's a luxury. If you can't afford food every month, no, you shouldn't have cable. Apparently, you're part of the problem because no one has their priorities straight. I don't care if it's cheap entertainment or not, if you can't afford your basic needs, guess what, you don't get those luxuries! And I bet if "those scumbags" suddenly weren't getting their check from the government next month, they would use the time they used to spend fucking like rabbits and drinking to find another job.

Anonymous said...

@jensational wow you can step the fuck down from your soapbox now wtf?? It's overly opinionated self righteous women like you that make this topic so controversial and complicated. Its health care. Its birth control. It should be free and hassle free.

Anonymous said...

I'm on the opposite end of this. I can't get pregnant without IVF. The procedure along with the medications needed are not covered by insurance unless I live in the right state. Total BS. Before someone says "just adopt" PLEASE put yourself in my shoes and how would you feel if your only chance to experience pregnancy and childbirth would be to have these treatments. You would do it as well. I PROMISE. I get pissed when I find out stuff that is covered by my insurance. I can have horrible eating habits, but get gastric bypass and only pay $300. I can smoke all my life and have emphesyma and that is totally covered, but I can't get pregnant by zero fault of my own and nothing is covered!!! I just feel like we get shafted. Its horrible.

maarmie said...

Um, I said PROFIT, not a cap on production. Guess either their prices would be lower or they'd pay higher wages or hire more people or put the money back into the company some other way. And who's talking about having cable but not feeding your kids?

Kim said...

Isn't it funny how the people who are screaming that birth control shouldn't be covered by insurance don't seem to give a rat's ass that Viagra IS covered. God effing forbid one of these guys can't get it up. THAT'S a serious medical problem. /sarcasm

Calls for a major throat punch, if you ask me.

Jensational said...

Anonymous I will not step down from my soapbox. Birth control is not health care and it should not be free. So you want a $750 per month contraceptive and can't pay for it? Go get the pill for $35. Its that kind of mentality that makes me sick to my stomach. Whah...birth control is too expensive....Whah..it should be free....Whah....oh all my medical should be free.....Whah.....I am a single mom with a son who has shriek and I have paid out the nose for his medical and it was hard but let me just tell ya, I would NEVER expect his care to be free. And KIM for the record I do care that Viagra is covered because whether a man can get an erection or not is nit my responsibility either. Its the guys. This is not what the problem is though ladies. The problem is the tyran in the white house that is ordering companies to provide things for free and screw the constitution right? We fought a huge war to get away from tis kind of thing. It was called the revolutionary war and we fought to be free .. NOT so govt can take care of our needs. If you want socialized medicine please go to europe or canada and listen to how much they "love" it there. One other thing: I bet you would love my overly opinionated self if I were a liberal on your side of the fence,right? Right.

Jensational said...

Ps...my son does not have shriek he has autism lmao. Im on my cell phone :-)

Anonymous said...

Where are the women's voices you ask? What about all the women serving our Country right this minute? They are our voices. You say it "sucks to be a woman right now"? Explain your thoughts to the women around the world who would have just been stoned to death or had acid poured on their faces if they post what you just did. It's an awesome time to be a woman, we can do anything and the includes choosing which contraception method works best for us even if we have to pay for it.

Chris Johnson said...

Right on Jen!

Chris Johnson said...

Right on!

Anonymous said...

For all taxpaying citizens...it is cheaper to provide free birth control to a woman than to pay for that same person if they get pregnant, cover all prenatal, delivery, postnatal, and child expenses.

Gypsy Soul said...

I was, both a member of the military, and then later a spouse. I LOVED Tricare. I never had to worry about paying for medicine, my daughter's birth was 100% paid for, as was my septoplasty that I had to have done for a deviated septum and spur that blocked my airway. Since then, I've had BCBS (best public health plan) & United (worst health plan). I'd take Tricare any day...even over BCBS!

Anonymous said...

I'm 45 and went to get an IUD replaced with a new one. The f'ing co-pay is 1185.00 yeah right. MY DOCTOR told me to go to Planned Parenthood and get it. I did and they ask you for a donation, clearly I did not have much but I gave some. The three girls after me that I overheard the receptionist ask for a "donation" said they had nothing to give. I was GLAD to be able to give so they could not. Women!! help the other Women! Your turn could come up when you need a little help.

Anonymous said...

Wow... lots to take in on the comments. I was recently diagnosed with PCOS and opted for the depo shot to help with it. I was offered an IUD but decided against it. My husband has had a vasectomy, works a decent job, we have fairly decent insurance except when it comes to birth control. There is no coverage for the depo shot. I paid the full 60 bucks for it and I might end up having to fight with the insurance company to pay for the visit when I have to go back and have them administer it. Sadly I have to use birth control to help with the PCOS, a hormone disorder. If it was anything else the insurance would cover it.

Anonymous said...

Pay it forward!

So Domesticated said...

@ Janel... the United States was founded on Judeo-Christian beliefs and what will ruin our country is the out-landish spending, if it continues to go on. Most Americans do not want to become a "Nanny State," like much of Europe. Yes, healthcare in America needs reform, but not by government take over.... it could very well bankrupt the country.

jenderella said...

I didn't read the majority of the comments because honestly I'm afraid I would start punching people in the throat. I had this very argument with my very anti-Obama aunt the other day. I wholeheartedly agree with you Jen. These religions are happy to accept government funds and are happy to be in the business of making money, but don't want to have to put up with any of the negative "side effects" of these things. Honestly I think it's just bad business on their part. It costs so much more to pay for a pregnancy and maternity leave than it does to pay for birth control. You would think they would get a f***ing clue! My aunt argued that it violates the amendment stating the separation of church and state. The church did that when they went into business, and most definitely if they took money from the state. They can't have it both ways. Since like most people who believe this nonsense about the religious being right & the government being wrong my aunt refuses to see any side but her own, I just stopped arguing, let her say her piece and changed the subject. Why waste my breath on someone who refuses to listen? You are so right.

maarmie said...

And I like how I mentioned education, abuse, discrimination etc and you only responded about profits. I can see what's important to you and, I hate to be the one to have to tell you, but you ARE the problem.

maarmie said...

Yes, WOW! It's a great idea. America needs to try something before it implodes. So glad I left.

B said...

I have a year old little girl says Depo can fail...be carefull!

Samantha said...

Reproductive health issues aside I do not think any employer should have the right to influence their insurance coverage based on their beliefs. What if shipping companies stopped covering back injuries because they believe those injuries are caused by improper form, and are the employees fault not theirs. What if teachers can't get coverage for stress related ailments because the school board doesn't want to cover it because they believe stress is jut part of the job? This would be a very slippery slope. There are enough flaws in the American medical system, you don't need to be opening up a huge loophole like this.

Jillian said...

Viagra is just the tip of the iceberg. How about the fact that Medicaid pays for penial implants, but does not pay for reconstructive surgery for women who have to have mastectomy. I didn't know this until my friend who is a nurse told me that she did the operation on some 69 year old man so he could get it up but some woman who has gone through such an ordeal as breast cancer can not get reconstructive surgery. That is some BULLSHIT!!!

Anonymous said...

Here they are. I signed it.

http://www.dccc.org/pages/wherearethewomen

-Niccole

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