Weekly Wrap Up 9.15.13

Well, it's been awhile since I've written a weekly wrap up and I thought it was time to get back in the habit. I was stupid busy this summer with writing and raising children. I'm too cheap to send the kids to camp all summer long, so instead I have to entertain them and there is only so much television they're willing to watch. You know you're failing at parenting when your kids start complaining that they've already seen this episode of "Full House" and they'd really just like to go to the pool and get some exercise or listen to you read them a book.

I managed to finish my manuscript for Random House a couple of weeks ago. Right around the same time the kids went back to school so now I have time to blog again (have you noticed?). I'm excited about the manuscript (and school). I think it's going to be a good book. I mean my mom really enjoyed it even though I made fun of her a lot in the book. I hope a few of you are saving your dollars so you can buy a copy for yourself and a friend, because your friends need to laugh too.

I've started leaving my house to speak to people. It's terrifying and fun all at the same time. I've got some upcoming dates set for the Kansas City area, so if you're around and you want to put some pants on and come out and see me, you can see all of the locations here. The next one will be at the Johnson County (KS) Library  on Thursday, September 26th. OK, just kidding, pants are only a suggestion.

What else is going on that's exciting? Ohh, this isn't my news, but it's still super crazy exciting. Remember last week when I encouraged everyone who already didn't own Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves to go out and buy it? Well, if you did then you helped catapult one of my favorite writers, Robin O'Bryant straight onto the New York Times Bestseller's List. The NYT list is the freaking Holy Grail and Robin did it (with your help). Thanks to everyone who supported her. I'm so excited and thrilled for her. I just hope she's holding me a spot on that list. I'd prefer number one, but I'll take whatever I can get.

Alright, let's get to This Week's Most Popular Posts:

Apparently Yellow is the Color of Money - There's a disgusting trend among pregnant women with access to Craigslist. I'm just sad I'm not pregnant, because I could use some extra scratch.

BMI Grade Cards at School - Schools are sending home grade cards with kids to tell them that not only are they failing Math, they're also too fat all while serving something called "Fish Treasures."

Pet Amber Alert -  This company annoys me and they should totally let me write their ads like the one I wrote for a missing cat at the bottom of the post.

We Can Do Better - Mrs. Hall, mother of three impressionable young boys, wrote a letter to the hootchies of the world who keep blinding her precious snowflakes with their fish lip photos. Poor Mrs. Hall got an earful from the world. I jumped in and gave her my two cents.

Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You - This one is total gossip and so worth a read.

My Favorite Comments (and My Replies if Necessary):

"Have you seen me-ow?" Good Lawd, I died. on Pet Amber Alert

Hehe, my cat's name IS Batman BruceWayne Ourlastname. When he is being a mischievous asshat, I yell at him using his full name. I wonder what the neighbors think... on Pet Amber Alert

That is the best name ever. If I ever break down and get a pet, I will probably have to use this name. Or Professor Punch. It's a toss up.

So many awful things come from well-intentioned idiots. on BMI Grade Cards at School

Oh girl, you know my thoughts on this. This is a national epidemic. As soon as impoverished families can buy fresh produce and lean meats at the same price as a Happy Meal, we'll start moving in a positive direction. Obesity is not just a social problem, it's an economic development issue. Telling children they are overweight does not even scratch the surface here and no need to tell parents they "should" be giving their children healthier/lower fat options. They KNOW this but, people only have the food dollars they have. Also, in most communities, like mine, a VAST majority of the public school children are on free/reduced lunch. They are getting 2 of their meals there. Let's change the direction of the telescope... on BMI Grade Cards at School

We need to educate parents on what constitutes a healthy weight/BMI and what is proper portion size for a child. In my practice, I use the BMI to validate to parents whether a kid is overweight, a healthy weight, or underweight. I see a fair number of patients who come in because their parent tells me the kid doesn't eat...or thinks they are too thin. Most of the time, neither statement is true, it is the expectations of the parents that need to be addressed. Maybe the school could take a bigger role in managing childhood obesity by first stop serving crap like chicken nuggets and pizza for lunch; one of my patients, an overweight youngster who attends an after school program (at her school) told me they were being served pizzas and nachos for an afterschool snack! Seriously? I'm working with her and her mother to help control her weight. Her mom had me write a letter to the program telling them she could only eat her healthy snacks from home. on BMI Grade Cards at School

5 years ago, when I was preggo, a good friend asked me to pee on a stick for her, so she could play a birthday prank on her vasectomized husband. She changed her mind when he fell down the stairs and cracked his skull open, just from a clutz move. She didn't want to see what would happen if she showed him a positive pee stick. on Apparently Yellow is the Color of Money

Lol. I am what you consider an oversharer. I totally posted my pregnancy test and every ultrasound pic, and have since posted billions of pics of my kid that maybe nobody but me wants to see. But I don't care! :-) I tried for this baby girl for six years and dang it, I had to/ have to share! on Apparently Yellow is the Color of Money

We're all oversharers of some kind. You overshare your baby and overshare mine (the blog). What makes you and I better is that we can laugh at ourselves for being oversharers.

This regularly-attending, actively-involved chuch lady LOVES your blog. I'd love to have you speak at one of our women's events! Keep on bloggin'! on Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You.

You haven't said, "get your fucking backpack and get your ass in the car" not even one time? on Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You.

Not to the kids. Maybe to the Hubs ...

How I took Jen's reaction was not that she was mad that the Pearl-Clutcher was upset. It was that instead of speaking to her church members about her reservations or contacting Jen, she went on a website designed to re-sell a specific brand of clothing, posted a part of one blog, and she (and every commenter) based her entire opinion about Jen's speaking ability/appropriateness on that. on Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You.

Yes. That was my reaction exactly. Thanks for explaining.

"Always watching..." Like Roz from Monsters Inc. : ) on Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You.

I am more like Roz than I care to admit.

The content of your blog is offensive to church goers/church leadership. Why would you expect to be welcomed to speak? Sure, you can censor yourself and behave in public. But your private life doesn't match up to what the Bible teaches (not that anyone's does, but it's clear here that you aren't trying to watch your language). Churches want the real deal. They have enough problems with people accusing them of hypocrisy. Allowing you to speak would be endorsing language/thoughts they find sinful. It would be more hypocritical to allow you to speak, imo. I'd give them a break on this issue. on Every Move You Make. I'll Be Watching You.

You're right, my private life doesn't match up with the Bible, but private lives matching the Bible hasn't stopped churches from opening their doors for years to worse offenders than me. Like tele-evangelists who steal from the offering plate or cheat on their wives. Or blame earthquakes on homosexuals. Or cover up sexual abuse for years. I'm the least of their worries when it comes to hypocrisy.

THANK YOU. Several friends posted this the other day and I was bothered by it but couldn't find the words. Once again, you found them for me, and they are way funnier than what I would have said. THANK YOU!!! on We Can Do Better

I agree somewhat and I get what Mrs. Hall is saying here but the whole...my boys are holier than thou so stop tempting them thing did make me roll my eyes. Come on, they are TEENAGE boys...they ogle girls in traffic for goodness sake and probably everywhere else. I'm all for monitoring online activity. I already do this with my son who is only 11. And I probably wouldn't be too happy about girls sending photos to my son. BUT I'm also a realist and I know this is going to happen at some point. All that I can do as his mother is prepare him for dating and falling in love and having feelings about girls. Sexuality is a normal, natural thing. However, you are correct that we need to teach young girls AND boys to have respect for themselves first and then for their chosen partners. I am trying my best to raise an honest gentleman who treats his future girlfriend(s) like a lady should be treated. on We Can Do Better

I think you hit the nail on the head when you said her post depicts her boys as being victimized. I agree that girls should not be posting skimpy, provocative pictures, but also some responsibility lies with boys in general & how they react to those & perceive all girls. Be respectful & don't respond to those kinds of posts (ie: delete them or block them). on We Can Do Better

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Unknown said...

I just wanted to share with you, Jen, how happy I get when I see you picked a comment from me as one of your favorites. I'm a total fangurl and I'm not embarrassed.

Anonymous said...

I am so glad that this is back!!! I missed the Weekly Wrap Up. It totally love when you pick one of my comments too.

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