Potty Parties


No, no, no, no, no!!  You can have a birthday party, a graduation party (even from preschool and Kindergarten if you must), a Halloween party, a baptism party, a Christmas party, a Hanukkah party, a Valentine's Day party, a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah, a first communion party, even a tea party, but I must draw the line at a potty party.

Thank God my kids are no longer in diapers and I've left that stinky road long ago so I doubt I'll ever be invited to one, but if I am, I will REFUSE to go to such an asinine event.

This is absolute madness.  No one should ever eat a cupcake with adorable icing underwear on it (I hope it didn't have a fudgy center).  Or eat candy out of a toilet mug.  I will never be able look at a Tootsie Roll again without thinking of it as a reward for going "Number 2" wink, wink (barf).


I get where the need for this party came from.  I really do.  Potty training kids is miserable and misery loves company, but did misery need to throw a party complete with a toilet paper wreath?  You have got to be kidding me.

Once again, I see that bar being raised by overachieving moms.  Why can't they just bribe their kids with new undies, M&Ms and a sticker chart like the rest of us?  Why must they feel the need to throw a fucking party for everything?


I'll give the blogger this, she admits that when she throws a party she goes over the top.  Well, I'd hate to see a birthday party if this is what she does for potty training.  I also realize this is her job and she must be constantly thinking of new, special events in our children's lives that we can memorialize with a party.

I would like to help her come up with some ideas.  If there can be a party for potty training, then there should be (and maybe there is and I just haven't found them yet) a party for:

1.  Learning to tie shoes:  "Are you in the loop?  Come help Johannes learn to tie his shoes!"  The hostess will provide cupcakes in the shape of tennis shoes and the guests will make fun cardboard "shoes" they can practice their bunny ears on.  No Velcro allowed!

2.  Eating vegetables:  "Veggies Rule!  Bring your favorite vegetable in bite size pieces to share.  I'll provide 25 made from scratch dips for dunking!"  It will be a tasting party for picky toddlers.  They can eat their veggies from martini glasses with fun toothpicks.

3.  Learning to zip a coat:  "Zip it!  Zip it real good!  Cady is ready to learn how to zip her coat like a big girl. Bring your favorite coat or jacket and let's learn together!"  The hostess can record her own "Zip It" song to Devo's "Whip It" and the guests can dance and sing while they learn to zip.  Buttoning coats will be another party.

4.  Cleaning their room:  "Legos and Beyblades and Mighty Beans, oh my!  Pop on over and help me teach Landon how to clean up his room."  This one will be great, because the hostess can have everyone bring their own bag to fill with the stuff they find under Landon's bed.  Goodie bags solved.

5.  Getting rid of the pacifier:  "Bye, bye, Paci!  Dakota is a big boy now and he's ready to say goodbye to his paci!  Come help Dakota bid his paci a fond farewell!  Bring your binkie, paci, nuk over too and throw it in the ceremonial fire!"  The hostess will light a fire in her beautiful outdoor fire pit and throw all of the guest's pacifiers into the fire.  The guests will be given lollipops to soothe them when they see their beloved pacifiers go up in flames.

Why let the younger kids have all the fun?

6.  Period Party:  "Aunt Flow had finally come to visit!  Londyn is a woman now and wants to sync up with her besties!"  The hostess will provide a jumbo bottle of Midol, a mega-box of tampons and an assortment of sweet and salty snacks.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Every day is not a party and kids don't need it to be.

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128 comments:

Anonymous said...

This post is hysterical! As a mommy to be and a Pinterest addict I have seen/heard about these kinds of parties but just don't really get the point...isn't this something that will mortify our children (not that that isn't part of the fun in having teenagers) later in life? I would hate to find evidence of such activities in my childhood photo album!

Nancy K said...

I heart you....

Unknown said...

Gee, potty training isn't even the hardest part! Will there be another party to celebrate the end of "Mommy, I'm finished pooping?". How about, "what's all the hype? Pookie's learned to wipe!". Give me a break

Micki Stetson said...

1.) Toothpicks & toddlers don't mix...been there!
2.) Are you allowed to burn pacifiers? Check with your local fire dept!
3.) To those who read this and jet right past the sarcasm...your welcome1

Keep up the great posts Jen!

SweetmamaK said...

I thought for sure she made this up, she's just running out of people to punch in the throat, now I'm sick that I went to the "link" page and added to her revenue. What happens when she doesn't get a ticker tape parade when she memorizes her math facts? And who are the people that comment on that blog???Other Stepfords.

SweetmamaK said...

and another thing, all those "printables" I really hope kids learn to use the toilet BEFORE reading. And do kids under the age of three get the sarcasm of underwear is so "yesterday" I hate these people

Anonymous said...

Love it! Over achieving moms are completely annoying. I came to the conclusion long ago that they don't do this crap for the kids; they do it for themselves. They love the compliments from the other moms: "you are SO amazing!", "I wish I was this creative!". Meanwhile, where are the husbands? Are they proud of the toilet paper wreath on their door? These moms are setting their kids up for failure. They are going to expect praise, attention and acknowledgement for everything they do! Good luck to them in college!

Carol said...

You are the best. This whole post was great but the period party was my favorite. "Sync up with her besties." LOL!!!

Sue said...

You do know about Red Tent parties, yes? (Complete with uterus pinata?)

Mr. Knowitall said...

Funny post, but I'm still considering a "Jimmy learned to wipe his own ass" party. There will be no kids allowed. Just me and my wife and a few friends, having a few drinks, without hearing "Daaaaaaaaady" being screamed from the bathroom.

JWright said...

Ew...I'm horrified. All these children look life fake children who belong in a magazine, and if she's going to throw a ridiculously over-the-top party for her obviously spoiled child, AND blog about it, at least use the correct "you're", as in "toss those diapers, YOU'RE a big kid now"

Split3ways said...

They all squealed with delight and peed their pants. Epic fail!

Tekglr33 said...

I am in the midst of potty training my son Owyhnn right now and we definitely will be throwing a potty training party.

Um, yeah...not so much. It's true that I'm potty training (my son I mean...I've got it down) and his name is Owen but spelled the normal people way. The "party" that's going to happen when he finally gets it is going to involve me jumping up and down in the basement a few times when I finally get to move the diaper genie down there for good.

JAG74 said...

I'm about to start the potty training process and I had NO IDEA this was going on! I'm horrified. Truly. And absolutely on the same page. I suspect that some people simply have a little too much time on their hands . . .

Spirit of Hope and Kindness Awards said...

Is her business slogan "We're #1 in the #2 business?" Sigh.

Vanessa Grant Events said...

HA! You are hysterical, really I do love reading your post. However, I am one of those overachieving moms that is planning to throw a "Potty Like A Rock Star Party" for my just turned 2 year old potty trained son. I don't plan on inviting many people, just my neighbors kids who have also recently been potty trained. Albeit it won't be as elaborate and gorgeous as the one on the blog, it will be on a smaller scale. Some parents bribe their kids with tooth rotting candy, or buy them all sorts of dangerous and non-educational toys, I throw him a party! I am after all a party planner ;). I get that it's not for everyone, but there is a market out there for over the top parties, and in this world you have to think outside the box sometimes.
Please understand I am in no way offended, I love reading your posts, and plan on doing so for a long time. I just thought I'd add a little wrench in and see how many moms are horrified that one of your readers is one of "those moms" LOL.

Christie said...

Can't they just have chicken pox parties like normal people? ;-)

Because nobody likes Mondays said...

I went to read it too, and I commented, but I don't think she is going to like my comment.

Because nobody likes Mondays said...

I potty trained my boys by letting them run around naked in the summer. If I had had a party I would be in jail right now.

Christie said...

#7 Rubbing One Out Party: Camdyn finally learned how to pleasure herself! Little Johnny left his first "crunchy shirt" in the hamper!! Cum celebrate with us!! Boys can engage in a good ol' Circle Jerk while the girls learn the beauty of dildos!

#8 Popping the Cherry Party: Cherry themed decorations and food will be provided. A large bed will be placed in the living room so we can all sit back and watch as the children make the step into adulthood!

~Abbey~ said...

where's the "Mom survived (insert kids name here) whiney day" party! or "I would rather stab myself in the eye than be around mom's like that" party!

~Abbey~ said...

after i read this i went to the link...i think i just threw up in my mouth. WTH!? there are better things to do with your money...and the wast of those good diapers just throwing them around the room. I wonder which frugal mom collected them to "reuse" when their kid just didn't get the note that there was no more poop or pee in the pants after the party!!

Anonymous said...

Guess I don't run in the right circles to get invited to a potty party (just finished potty training my 3yo) and it would never occur to me to have one.

I do have a 5 yo getting ready to lose a couple of teeth. I better get to planning!

(And your names for the kids crack me up - I def. would want to punch those parents in the throat just for those names!)

Heather said...

i don't even know what to say. wow. all i kept thinking as i scrolled through was how much MONEY she dropped on this party for four kids who could care less if they had couture cupcakes or duncan hines. as a Marine Wife with a streeetched thin budget, i cringed at the assortment of pink and blue bobbles and honestly could not believe the work that went into the party that was TOTALLY for the benefit of all the other moms. "you're SO amazing! this is INCREDIBLE! Wow. I can't believe you did all this. You are the most creative mom I know". ugh.

K. Fox said...

lol!

Orangies Attic said...

Those kids that get a crown for their every fart are going to be a real joy when they are 15... just sayin'.

K. Fox said...

You are so right....it is all for the Mom! It doesn't end there....I work in special event decorating, and you wouldn't believe how crazy it gets. Just saw an over the top vintage toy party for a 3 year old...what 3 year old requests that theme? It was all about the decor and the photo opps so that the Mom could post it on her blog. Kids prefer toys with batteries and paper plates with Nickelodeon characters on them (that just doesn't sell their overpriced printables!). Sorry for the rant.....

Sarah said...

I threw a pacifier party..lol..I warned them both for a week that on the day of the "pla pla" bye bye party that it would be the last day for their pacifier. We did not invite anyone though. I just went to the commissary, bought a cute cake and we had it after dinner :) It completely worked and neither of my boys asked for their pacifiers again!

Kristen said...

And we wonder why kids think they shouldnget everything under the sun! Thanks to the over achieving parents, my students think they should get an award for every litle thing they do right, sorta right and down right wrong. Seriously? Love your posts! Keep 'em coming!

Diane said...

OH MY GOD!!!! I cannot believe people actually do this. I can't believe that person spent money on that! Stunned, just stunned.

Tracy said...

This reminds me of my Facebook friend that posted a picture and announced to the world the first time her son went pee on the potty. And no, I'm not kidding, she actually posted a picture of the potty with pee in it. What the heck is wrong with these people?! I do not want to see your son's pee, whether it be in the potty or not. Some "celebrations" should be reserved for immediate family (aka Mom and Dad who don't have to change diapers anymore). I don't have kids yet, but I hope several people punch me if I even THINK about throwing my child a potty party...

nikki said...

I need a diaper, one to stop me from throwing up and one to stop all the shit that I wanted to spew from my mouth as I read her blog...
This woman is NOT real ,, right???
I'm thinking its a joke. Then I realize it's not. scary fucker she is as are her followers...
God Help America...

Justine said...

hilarious!

Heather said...

i'm sooo with you! kids DON'T want those things! they are perfectly happy jumping around in the sprinkler with tacky pinatas and bags of candy that they don't get on other days. i understand wanting to make special days special for your kids, but i don't understand the level of entitlement we're nurturing in our kids. kinda scares me.

Anonymous said...

I hate to break it to you, but the period party is alive and well. They call them "Red Tent Parties". Of all the parties, I think the red tent is the worst. My mom made a HUGE deal about becoming a woman to the point that I was so fearful of what she'd do when she found out I got my period that I hid it from her and for 6 months. It wasn't until my dad (my parents split when I was a wee one) spilled the beans to her that she found out and her excitement was enough to mortify me for years. I can only thank God that red tent parties did not exist 20 years ago or I would have gone straight to the asylum.

Monica said...

I hate this potty party idea and think it's ridiculous and over the top, I too have already been there and done the potty training thing years ago.It does seem like there are moms out there that REALLY NEED A LIFE!!
I don't get why you have to use another blog and put in another blogger's link in order to get your point across though..Why not just B@tch about the stupidness of this potty party idea? Is it just for the drama?

MASmommy said...

Wish I could have a bye bye thumb sucking party....after cake and ice cream mommy's gonna cut your thumb off. LOL

Julie said...

I went to check out the potty party blog, and am amazed that the children attending all appear to be straight from a Pottery Barn Kids catalog. Am I the only one whose son heads everywhere (parties included) in superhero t-shirts from Target?

And it's hilarious to see that as of January 19 all the snarky comments jump in on her page. Hmm...wonder whose readers those could be coming from...

Becky said...

When we got my daughter potty trained, we threw a party - my husband and I toasted ourselves on a job well done. Every day is a party at our house, but without all those fancy decorations and blog worthy pictures. That's just how we roll....

tatooine84 said...

I have been reading about them in a book, potty train in one day (or something similar). I am pretty sure we are not going to have one, and if we d it will be just us and some cupcakes, lol.

erin said...

HA! You're hilarious, and so are quite a few of your readers! I almost love reading the comments as much as your posts! The Mrs and Mr Knowitall both had me rolling!

Mom on the Edge said...

That woman's blog kind of made me want to shoot myself...

Kristen said...

Heh heh - you said potty parties are asinine. ASS-inine. Heh heh.

Now that I have that Beavis & Butthead moment out of the way I will agree with you. We wonder why children are growing up overweight and thinking that the universe revolves around them, it could be traced back to parties thrown for minor stepping stones along the path of life complete with cake and ice cream.

Honestly, I empathize with the life of a SAHM, as I thought it was horribly boring when I tried it, but there are so many needy people and organizations out there who could benefit from a little bit of the time and money that one might devote to garbage like this. I think I'm finally starting to understand where Rick Santorum's voting base is coming from - perfect-looking blonde, blue-eyed moms with model-perfect children who live so far outside the real world that this is how they amuse themselves: giving their toddler girls pedicures while they sit on the toilet.

I feel really sorry for those kids because sooner or later they will get a taste of the real world and it will be a tremendous shock.

Debbi said...

Love you. (but is it bad that I read your sarcastic veggie party and thought, wow, what a great playdate snack idea? What if I promise to live on the edge and not cut them into tiny pieces and run the risk of choke-size pieces?) Regardless, I still love you.

jess said...

Wow...I checked out the link and am amazed someone has that much extra time on their hands....usually I just buy the boys new chonies when they learn....

Melissa said...

Wow. Just...wow. I can't believe this is a real thing. That someone ACTUALLY did this. Holy crap...no pun intended.

I like your other party ideas though. Clever!

Sheric said...

I think I just peed a little bit!

NHGirl said...

The boys and the blonde little girl look like they're having fun, but the brunette (who is probably Aubrey) looks mortified in almost every picture.

I hope that mom is saving all the money she's making off this to pay for her child's inevitable therapy.

Fibra Artysta said...

This kid is going to need some serious therapy. Ludicrous.

Xayton said...

I hate mighty beans!!!! Most obnoxious toy! My son has squinkies and trash pack guys ..... Which they discontinued of course after we bought the accessories n that wasnhis main gift for birthday but that's another punch. Mighty beans HURT when dropped on toes, I'm secretly purging our household of them. On the potty issue, I love and agree with most your blogs but guess I'm kinda an a** on this one, we had a potty party for my big boy when he finally got trained, n have been bribing the 2 1/2 year old with one. However our "potty parties" consists of the two kids, husband and myself, and the party is just us going to celebrate at chucky cheese for pizza and a night of games bc I reserve chuck e cheese for an extra special event place ie birthday parties, big achievement things not just a "bored on a Thursday so well hang out there" place. Would never consider inviting anyone else or baking cakes shaped like poop, eck

mosaicmaddness said...

My favorite thing about this post is how you used all the hippest ways to spell all the names, LOL. So hilarious!

Tazi Kat said...

My human (I am a cat) used to board with a woman who ran an at-home day-care. Whenever one of the children age 2 1/2 or under finally asked to use the potty, I would give them a high five and say we needed to celebrate! I gave them a Hoodsie cup of ice-cream, and a hug. It encouraged potty use among the diaper set.

NaptownKatie said...

First off, love the names you select as your examples. Pricelss!

Second, I did check out her party and all I can say is TACKY, tack, TACKY! Who would want to eat a yellow jelly bean that is supposed to remind them of urine? And who in God's name would want to eat a cupcake with a crotch on it? I'd have loved to been the baker and seen the looks on their face when that order came through. I'm sure they were laughing their asses off all the way to the bank!

Unknown said...

#1: Creative Juice? That just sounds so dirty and gross....
#2: Any Potty Party would involve ONLY my husband and me drinking heavily to celebrate $20 a week going to beer and not diapers. And not having to wipe poopy asses anymore.

Just Another Day said...

This poor child isn't going to have a chance in the real world if her mother keeps this crap up.

Manna said...

I want a "like" button for all of these comments. Oh yeah, and the blog too...but that's a given.

No One Could Make This Stuff Up said...

I am speechless. A potty party? Unbelievable. And the pictures??? Obviously this person has a LOT of time on her hands - and yep, I def see a "first period" party in about 10 years.

Dedi said...

Don't forget we need a party for ditching the training wheels! Although...I may use it, otherwise my 9yo will likely never ride a damn bike. *sigh*

Lauren said...

OH I love you. I've actually heard of people having period parties, gross. My friend threw a "Good-bye Paci" party for her 4 year old. I guess it was about time. They tied them all to balloons and watched them float away. I like your firepit idea better.

Samantha said...

I've been seeing these parties.... Birthday parties is one thing. Holiday parties are another thing. Potty Parties? Do these people WANT their kids to grow up thinking that their every move deserves some type of gala complete with goody bag? I am the first person to admit I go a tad bit overboard with birthday parties for my boys, but I draw the line at parties revolving around bodily functions and where they occur. Now, when we finally get my middle child off of the pacifer I may throw a party. That thing is the devil.

Unknown said...

I checked out the link and the one girl was looking at the cupcakes like 'what the f**k, why is there underwear on my cupcake?'

Mama Moo said...

I loved your post! I checked out the link and I think I threw up a little in my mouth. I try hard to make nice parties for my boys but with 3 of our 4 birthdays in one month it gets tricky and even their BIRTHDAYS aren't ever that nice. I wish I had money like that to blow on frivilous nonsense. I think it is great to celebrate those things with your kids, but is it not enough to let them chose new undies or a potty seat? Such grand celebrations for every milestone plays a large role in why kids feel so entilted. I think it make being an adult disappointing too. Unless...maybe I should have I did the huge ass pile of laundry party? How about a party to celebrate "I'm eating healthy and cut out caffeine but the kids are still alive" ?

Just Another Day said...

I think someone got under Mindy's skin from her response. It's a blog for goodness sakes, not everyone is going to agree with you all of the time.

imbogus1 said...

Yet another reason to say this country is in the shitter! !!!

Unknown said...

Uh..yeah. They exist. Like we need to create one more reason for our daughters to hate us and end up in therapy.

OC Mama said...

So, the craziest part of all is it looks like (from the place settings and set up) that there were FOUR children in attendance? Uhm. Wow. That's a whole-lotta-potty-prep for 4 freaking kids. She's a better mom than I am.

Dawn said...

It's possible that I was invited to one of these parties WAY before my twins were of potty-training age. And it's possible that I had "a, er, a, thing that day, but thanks!" that prevented me from attending. Bummer! This one was, I believe, Gerber sponsored and the mom got free things for throwing it? I don't have the energy to look up to see if that exists, but that's even more ironic. Did the poop look more like organic Gerber carrots or peas?

mindy starr cone said...

nope. didn't get under my skin. i think its funny! i am enjoying all these comments! makes me laugh.
i have a sense of humor.
otherwise i wouldnt have done this party at all. its FUNNY

Just Another Day said...

My apologies. Your post seemed like you were a little bitter and your head was going to start spinning around at any minute. At least you aren't wasting your time "reading a mean blog" though right. Oh wait.....

Anonymous said...

WELL SAID Vanessa!!

Laur said...

Dakota is a dogs name no? Back to the point - anyone who throws OR goes to these types of parties is a douche canoe (still my favorite saying of the year!)

Jen Piwtpitt said...

Yay! Mindy has a sense of humor! Don't worry, Mindy, I bet you still sell a couple of supply kits this week. ;)

Ashlie K said...

I didn't think the idea was all that bad, but I couldn't excuse the whole 'bad grammar and misspelling is fun' part. Did you see where she wrote that the party only 'costed' her $25??!! I teach English as a second language to adults, and I have NEVER even heard 'costed' from a student! This doesn't make a person look 'quirky,' it makes them look uneducated.

Blissfully Discontented said...

These kids will grow up to be the little shits that my kids end up rooming with in college....that will be the moment they learn that I suck...lol. Thanks a bunch, over-achievers!!

JoAnna said...

This post is hilarious, as usual, but I have to say that I almost kinda like the idea of a veggie party. It might be a fun way to get kids to find veggies they like.

Jamie said...

The good thing about this overachieving twit is that she gives normal parents like us something to laugh about.

cathy said...

I agree 100% I saw this party on another site and as I quickly scrolled through it, I thought the cupcakes were dradles. I then saw the whole diaper theme and just rolled (ha!ha!) my eyes :)

Brandy@Bright Occasions said...

Uhhhhhh. I WANT to throw a potty party. More like a potty get-together. PT'ing with my first was a nightmare. The second is not really jumping on the bandwagon. I want to light a potty fire under that diapered behind! Leave me to my potty humor in peace! :) Will I be buying supplies? No, I make party favors as a business, so I've got that covered. :) And if everyone who is bashing this poor person for being over the top would please visit three or four party planning sites, you'll see that over the top is just the tip of the iceberg! All the kids (and adults) are dressed to kill, coordinated with the paper goods, and ready for a photo shoot...because that's what it is, a photo shoot. A production. Not real life. Yes, the idea is silly...of course it's silly! Did she increase web traffic? Yes. Sales? Very likely. Number of potty parties thrown? Undoubtedly. Is she causing the downfall of society? Naaaaah, I don't think so. But I think she's a very smart business woman! I haven't even followed the link yet, and already, I like her! And secretly I think Snarky does too...

Sarah Bradshay said...

Ok, I agree that this party is crazy and unnecessary. And I love this blog and agree wholeheartedly with everything you said. However, I just went to the link of the party and saw everyone's mean and nasty comments on there and was a bit taken aback. I don't think it's fair for all of us to go crazy on the mom who did it. It's her blog and her kid... If she wants to be crazycakes and throw her kid a potty party, just be glad you weren't invited. All the people who followed the link and decided to post snarky comments on her blog are as unnecessary as a party to celebrate poop. Yelling at a complete stranger isn't going to change her mind and it just makes you look kinda mean.

Marcella said...

haha!! Love!

Lynn said...

LOVE IT!

Lanae Brown said...

Yes, a potty party is a little over the top, but seriously, it was pretty cute! And like Brandy@BrightOccasions said, she's a smart business woman, I bet she's sold that crap like crazy.
And I agree with Sarah too, just because you don't agree, you don't have to be mean about it. It's different to joke about it on this blog, but to leave mean comments on someone else's blog is unnecessary. We're all moms, why tear each other down?

Kimberly Kay said...

Holy crap! PLease read my post from the other day.
http://kimmekayo.blogspot.com/2012/01/potty-partyno.html

be said...

I have yet to choke my ass clown of a husband in the 9+ years we've been together. Someone should throw me a party for that.

Jen Piwtpitt said...

Holy crap! That's crazy. Great minds think alike! I like your playlist!

jenfoo said...

My mother-in-law, who raised only boys, really wanted to have a "period party" for my daughter. I was aghast. We should have a party to celebrate "X number of days without m-i-l pissing me off".

Painfully Exasperated said...

OMG... why didn't you think of pee your pants while reading a blog party. It can also be to the tune of Devo's "Whip It". Piss it... Piss it real good!

Tekglr33 said...

See this is what I'm talking about!!!! LOVE it!

Unknown said...

I understand the idea behind the potty party, but I would never throw one. At least not one that I would invite others to. My version would involve a boxed cake (only because I'm a sucker for cake) and a pat on the back. ;) I guess it's just the way my family is. We don't think bathroom humor is funny (more like disgusting, actually), and we don't publicly celebrate things like this. I'm more of a "what happens on the toilet, stays on the toilet" kind of person.

That having been said, I think it's sad that there were so many rude comments left of the woman's blog. I do understand that she's a party planner, and that she does this for a living. Over the top? Completely. Warranted? Yes, given her job, and the fact that she seemed to be pretty creative with it. Anyway, there are my two cents! Keep up the awesome posts. :)

Rachel said...

clicked on the link. felt like david after the dentist, just kept thinking "is this real life?"
who has the time/energy/money/desire to execute this? for a THREE YEAR OLD. because they can sit on a toilet and pee?!

bethj said...

Best response all day. Love it.

Jamie said...

Oh, wow...my 3 girls are TOTALLY having Aunt Flo parties now. Instead of a diaper wreath, I'll make a maxipad wreath for the front door. I'm thinking red fruit punch in the punch bowl and red velvet cupcakes. Thanks for the great idea. HAHAHAHA!!!

mindy starr cone said...

i like you brandy! thanks for the comment :)

Shannon said...

How about the parties where people cut into a cake to reveal the sex of their unborn child? WTF is THAT?!

Confessions of a PTO Mom said...

Life really was better when we were kids, wasn't it?

one stone events said...

wow! i'm shocked at the lack of sense of humor so many people have! if you seriously don't find this party funny and clever, you're not seeing the humor AT ALL. and how nice that we can all judge each other for how we spend our time and money. making moments special for our children is part of what makes us good parents. how we choose to do those things and be creative about it, is part of what makes their experiences unique. bottom line, look how creative this blogger (and some of her commenters) got coming up with party ideas. looks like creative juice DID indeed inspire some of you.

Anonymous said...

A friend of mine actually HAD a "getting rid of paci" party. No joke. She invited us all to bring our kids and to give them cake and ice cream and then put the paci's in an envelope and put them in the mailboc for the "paci fairy." I politely responded that my 2 year old hasn't had a paci since she was 6 months old, and the woman suggested I bring her blankie that she loves to get rid of it. Umm... no thanks.

B Mad said...

You forgot one for the boys... How about #7 "Happy my voice has dropped an octave day party!" Overachieving parents can give out Playboy magazines and tubesocks.

Anonymous said...

You had me at Period Party. LOL!

trocar.trainee said...

Sh**! I just spit my soda everywhere and a little bit is making it's way out of my nose.

Anonymous said...

I'm rooting for the "Londyn lost her virginity" party.

unplannedAdulthood said...

If anyone had thrown me a period party, I would have throat punched everyone from here to California.

P.S. Londyn's lost virginity party is themed- red solo cups, vomit on the floor, posters of hooters girls on the wall, and natty light.

granolagirl said...

OK, OK I will speak up on this one. My daughter did have a panty party. We worked really hard and it tokk a LOONNNGGG time to learn to use the potty. She was done at 2 and then a trip out of town took us back to square one. So after 6 months of relearning, bribing with EVERYTHING under the sun. I could bot buy anymore trains, cars, stickers, animals, and there was to be NO MORE CANDY. So we did have a Panty Party.....BUT she was the only little tot there. The rest where our family (our female friends as we have NO family here) and her two big sisters. There was cupcakes. but no decor, no signs, just a lot of panties that all of her family decorated for her.. Oh yeah.. the adults had a panty exchange too. And boy was that fun....who knew a merkin could create such laughter!
As for the potty party that is being referred to in this blog posting... that is totally over the top. That was going way to far.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you Jen! This post reminded me of a recent Special Agent Oso show that my daughter, who's two, watched last week as I was making dinner. Usually I never tune in or listen to the mindless activities that occur on these shows, but for some reason my ears perked up during this one. Maybe it was because Oso was helping the little boy on the show learn to ..... *wait for it*..... BLOW HIS NOSE. While I appreciate that the show is trying to promote hygene or I at least hope that that was the point - the fact that my 2 year old sat there mindlessly for 25 minutes watching a bear teach a kid how to blow his nose was beyond me. This is what kids find interesting? I cannot imagine being invited to a potty party.... sounds pretty ridiculous to me. Unless there there were maybe cocktails served for the adults? Then, I'm in! Keep writing - you're hilarious and I love catching up every Monday morning on your weekly rants and insight!

Angie Alford said...

I think she took it rather well , considering people trashing her children !! I would be hunting them down punching them in the throat. You don't like the party , o'well, but don't bring someones children into it.

Teronia Wilson said...

So another blogger who's friends with that blogger vented on her blog about the hurtful comments left on said friend's blog and I had to stick up for you a little because it was turning into a "bullying is wrong" fest. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I am both an overachieving mom (because I refuse to pay those high ass prices for shit I can make myself at home) and a Punch in the Throat mom (I can really bitch when I want to and some things are just ridiculous) so I can see both sides.

JWright said...

agreed... horrifying!

Anonymous said...

LOL, I accidentally stumbled across this when I was googling some potty training info for a friend. I had no idea this happened. But, FYI- some of us use the term "potty party" for something entirely different- it's merely a potty training day and there are NOOOOOOO guests!!!!! Ew! This is private. And there are no rediculous themed cakes or wreaths, lol. Dr. Phil has talked about it before. So, just thought I'd throw that out there so if you're chatting with someone at the park and they mention "potty party", you might want to clarify which one they mean. Parties in general have gotten out of hand. Even birthday parties. Besides, don't you think that is a lot of pressure for a kid? Like they must be feeling- I've had this party I better not mess it up no- type pressure? Or the pressure of what if I have an accident at my potty party? That's not a good idea!

Anonymous said...

The link she is talking about is this ---->

http://getcreativejuice.blogspot.com/2011/11/our-parties-potty-party.html

Anonymous said...

I am throwing my daughter a potty party. I am not a over acheiver mom. I love my kids. When they accomplish something, I want them to know that I am proud of them. For a 2 year old a party is fun. It gives them a sense of pride for what they has accomplished. My kids will go on to want to continue to accomplish great things. You are all being judgemental. My boys are teenagers now and are good guys that do not get introuble, do drugs, they get good grades and come to me with anything. I do things like pay them for every A on there report card and buy them things or throw them parties for being on the honor roll. It makes them want to continue to do well. Thats my way of doing things. yours may be different. I dont think yours is wrong so why do you judge mine?

Anonymous said...

Thank you. We are all different. It does not make us wrong and this is so very judgemental. I dont punch people in the throat and I dont go around suggesting it, but if I was going to, it would be the ones on here judging others..

Anonymous said...

Potty parties are a PRIVATE event between the parents and the child being potty trained. It is to motivate the child to go potty in the toilet. It is not an event to invite other people over. If you must criticize, at the very least you should know what it is you are talking about.

Sparkina said...

Holy Roman Emperors! I'm not a parent yet, but when I am, I would never subject a child of mine to such foolishness.
What about throwing a big bash because little Tylor learned to keep his room neat or little Hartleigh starting helping her Mommy and Daddy around the house or little Owynn quit throwing tantrums? I mean, for crying in Manhattan, some things are just part of life, and it's doing kids a big disservice when Those Parents act like every fart-bomb the kid toots out of his or her @$$ is a Beethoven sonata! I don't even like reward systems and sticker charts for that reason and would never use them for a child of mine. Some things are NORMAL, and you don't celebrate normalcy. What's going to happen when these kids learn that life isn't going to clap and cheer and throw confetti at their feet for breathing?

Anonymous said...

Not ALL kids get to have birthday parties and holiday parties. so GUESS WHAT?!!! Im having a potty party for my kid. So what are you gonna do? Geez grow up and let people have fun. Instead of judging people how bout the next time you go to church if you even go you actually listen to the whole not judging someone maybe then your children wont turn out like you

Anonymous said...

If I ever went to church I would certainly make a point of "praying" that my kid doesn't turn out to be a humorless twat.

Amanda said...

When I first read this post back in January, I chuckled at those crazy ridiculous OAMs throwing a potty party. How silly! That was when I naively thought I could have my 2 year triplets go commando on the first warm days of spring and they would then be fully "trained" telling me every time a little urge needed to happen and we would head any working toilet. Now they're almost 3, the end of 2012 is almost here and I have cleaned up more messes than I ever did in my 10 years as a nurse. If my daughter would just drop a deuce in the toilet and not her underwear, I'd take them on a trip to Disney World at this point! I'm waiting for the preschool to kick them out for too many accidents because when I applied and said they were "potty trained" they did just fine when going around naked outdoors. If we lived in a more nudist accepting culture, I'm sure there would be no problem. (BTW, is it okay to cancel their birthday and Christmas and just throw a potty party if the little buggars will just use a toilet?)

Anonymous said...

My friend (she was completely joking) posted something on Facebook when her son barfed in a toilet for the first time. Maybe she should have thrown him a party! ha ha ha

Susan said...

Dear god, I love the period party!

Erin said...

The reason I wouldn't throw one? Because, without fail I'd throw a big party and a week later my kid would come home from preschool with the "wet clothing bag of shame" and all the other moms would be, like "oh, I thought the little guy was potty trained! Didn't you have that big party and everything last week?"

Lamphone Schueder said...

hahaha! I was going to suggest a "guess who got their first chest/facial hair" party! You could give out little bottles of Aqua Velva for goodies.

ercatalano said...

LOL. Loved "Are you in the loop?" I can barely get it together for my kids bday party.

Julia said...

How about for us grown ups? Party for making it through the day without killing any annoying coworkers? or perhaps for making it through some of these asinine party so we're expected to attend?

Unknown said...

Wish there was a like button. That was great! Lol

Lindsey S. said...

I kind of feel like these kind of parties are only thrown by people who name their kids the way you've spelled them...

arherber said...

Best post yet!!! Zip it real good!

Anonymous said...

Why the hate? Finally, a place where party poopers are welcome!

Tia said...

Ok, I know your last "flow party" was meant as a joke, but I honestly had a friend who's Mom did do that... It was MORTIFYING for everyone involved. >_< Also, You may like this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEcZmT0fiNM

Full Spectrum Mama said...

As a real live mother of special needs kids who still have not learned to do some of these things, i give my official imprimatur of non-party throwing even when it might be an actual accomplishment. C'MON, people.

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