Lululemon's Yoga Pants Aren't the Problem - You Are

I swear, I can't turn on the news without hearing about yet another company with some d-bag at the top sticking his foot in his mouth. Don't these guys have PR firms that can handle this stuff? Do you think they know the cameras are on when they start talking or do they think they're just hanging out with their douchey buddies?

A few months ago it was Abercrombie & Fitch's CEO telling people they were too fat and ugly to shop at their stores. This week it is Lululemon's co-founder blaming an obvious defect with their product on women's fat asses and thighs and "over-zealous wearage." (I just made up that term, but I think if you read further, you will see that it fits and I'm betting it will be on a Lululemon CYA/disclaimer tag very soon.)


There's been some controversy in the high-dollar-yoga-pant-wearing world recently when it became apparent that Lululemon's pants were a little sheer for some of the ladies wearing them. It wasn't just the big girls having this problem, though I've seen the pictures of very small butts showing through very see through pants. There is obviously a problem with the material they're using to make the pants. Something has changed and many women are feeling a breeze on their backsides.

Instead of taking responsiblity and trying to fix the problem, the co-founder and Chairman, Chip Wilson, theorized about the cause of these sheer and pilling pants.

"Frankly some women's bodies just don't actually work for it," Wilson said. "They don't work for some women's bodies. It's really about the rubbing through the thighs, how much pressure is there over a period of time, how they much they use it." (You can see his video here.) 

How much "pressure" is on them? They're yoga pants. They should be designed for pressure and rubbing and stretching as well as running errands, picking up kids from school, and vacuuming, you asshat.

Oh Chip, Chip, Chip. Why beat around the bush? Just come out and say it: Our pants only go up to a size 12. You girls with the 14 and 16 on your jeans should not be trying to squeeze yourselves into our pants. They stretch for a down dog, but not for a hot dog. If you put down the remote control and actually took your damn yoga pants to yoga, maybe they wouldn't be so sheer and pilly on you.

His wife was sitting right next to him and even though she looked like she might like to tell him to shut the hell up, she never did. 

Can you hear yourself? Shut it!
(source: Bloomberg TV)
Instead she stood by her man and doubled down on the asinine remarks by asking some nonsense about people causing damage to their their Lululemon's because they're putting them up against concrete. What the hell are you rambling about, lady?  

Ironically, these answers came up in an interview about taking 60 seconds a day to get your mind zen'd out and just recharge. These two need to take a week, because they're on a roll. Besides blaming their customers for these defects, they also mocked a domestic abuse fundraising event in Dallas. When they got called out on their shitty behavior, they offered to give "the gift of yoga" to the abused women at the shelter. Yeah, because yoga is exactly what those ladies need. At least give them some see through pants as well!  

I can honestly say I've never even tried on a pair of Lululemon yoga pants, let alone paid a hundred bucks for a pair. However, if I did, I would sure as hell expect them to never pill and they should stretch enough to cover my ass, even if I'm sitting on the apparent yoga pant killer: concrete.

I know that Lululemon has a cult like following where women swear up and down about how amazing their asses look in their yoga pants. Luckily, I'm not that vain and my ass isn't that great to begin with anyway. I like my Danskin yoga pants from Wal-Mart. They stretch where they need to stretch without giving away the goods and they never pill (even when I roll around on concrete, as I'm wont to do).
Plus, at 12 bucks a pop, I won't mind replacing them if they get a little sheer from over-zealous wearage.

Disclaimer: This was obviously not a sponsored post for Lululemon since I didn't say anything nice about them. I did say nice things about Danskin, but unfortunately they didn't pay me either. If you're reading this Danskin and you wanted to send me a couple pairs of non see through yoga pants, I wouldn't say no. A girl's gotta get her yoga pants somehow.

Follow me on Facebook and Twitter.

61 comments:

Unknown said...

Awesome as always! I too have never tried on a pair of Lululemon yoga pants, but have been dragged into a few stores. I love my Old Navy brand or even the gear tek and fila lines carried at kohl's for a fraction of the price!

Becks said...

My 9 yo daughter's eyes almost popped out of her head when she could see through the pants the girl in front of us was wearing. I saw my daughter's eyes bug out, her jaw drop and followed her gaze. The girl in front of us was probably a size 2 wearing black yoga pants and a black lace thong. It was a good teaching moment.

Wendy White Van said...

I honestly did not know there was such an animal. Designer. Yoga. Pants. Wow! I need to think up a designer-something. Then I can get rich, retire and have enough money to buy designer other-stuff. How about designer mouth-muzzles for douche bags? Sizes L, XL and "Shut the EFF UP!!"

Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms said...

Don't blame your defects on my thighs, lululemon. Excuse me while I go wallow on some concrete in my Target pants. Target gets me. Ellen

Clare said...

My favourite pair of yoga pants came from Old Navy :P

Unknown said...

I dunno. After reading this I think I might be interested in getting a pair of Lululemon's check-out-the-goodies yoga pants. Now that I've raised my kids and this whole going back to school thing doesn't work out I could always fall back on prostitution...excuse me...DESIGNER prostitution. You wanna downward dog baby...yeah you do.

JC said...

Shoot, my favorite pair of yoga pants came from A THRIFT STORE. I have worn them for 7 yrs, to yoga, and through 2 pregnancies and they aren't pilling or see-through! Suck it, Lululemon.

Precious Princess of Banananland said...

On the money, per usual. Concrete & yoga pants. Makes perfect sense.

Unknown said...

My favorite pair of yoga pants came from Family Dollar @ $10 and I love them!

Valerie said...

@Clare -- my favorite yoga pants are from Old Navy, too! Think I bought a pair from Tar-jay as well.

Our Family, Our Life said...

They're only yoga pants if you're doing yoga. Otherwise, they're comfy beer and wine drinking pants!

Kate said...

I love the Old Navy brand yoga pants too!

Jenny said...

I would punch myself in the throat if I paid 100 bucks for what I like to call my Taco Bell regret pants.

collierose13 said...

I prefer to call them my "buffet pants".

LilyPetals said...

As I sit here in my favorite Danskin yoga pants which have survived over two years of VERY overzealous usage, I applaud your article. Here here!

Unknown said...

ASSHAT! HA HA HA HA!

Lisa said...

Love my Jockey Person to Person Modern Bootleg pants. Thick, stretchy and super comfy. Six years of constant washing, drying and wearing = no pilling, no fading and still going strong. Worth every penny to know my panties won't be showing through! Let me know if you want to try them for yourself.... www.myjockeyp2p.com/lisaschumacher

Unknown said...

Yep, I too wear the affordable, but not cheap, Old Navy yoga pants. I'm a size 12/14 so I def wouldn't squeeze myself into Lululemon even if I COULD afford them.

BowChicaBowMom said...

If I'm going to pay $100 for grocery-store-going-pants they better make my butt look like Jenna Jameson's. Clearly it is not a butt flaw, its a design flaw.

DRose said...

Best yoga pants I ever bought was a $10 off brand pair at Ross. That was 2 years ago and they're still going strong!

Stephanie said...

Too funny...thank you!! and will agree with some of the other posters...my favorites came from Old Navy.

Unknown said...

this is my favorite comment ever

GrandeMocha said...

My Target yoga pants are 12ish years old. Still work great.

Unknown said...

I hesitate to comment but as a LLL wearer for over 10 years I have to say the quality of the material they now use is not as it once was. I still have, and wear, my first LLL yoga pants; but the pair I purchased two years ago are pretty much unwearable because of the fabric simply wearing out quickly.

As a taller person I loved that they offered tailoring in-store so I could finally have a pair of non-highwater workout pants.

WineMustache said...

I own two pair of Lulu's pants and I LOVE THEM. Yes, the guy is a douche. But if i can work out and run errands in a pair of comfortable designer yoga pants that DO make my 45 year old ass look better..WHY not?! And sorry, too many women do try to squeeze their ass into pants that are too small. MAYBE if they went a size up they wouldnt have so many thighs and ass issues.

chris said...

I will now and forever call them this lmbo

Jenn B said...

I park my size 12 arse in yoga pants from Old Navy. I'll park some serious cash on my handbags, but on something that I'm going to sweat in? Um no thank you.

Unknown said...

Lmfao! Awesome!

Unknown said...

I have the same walmart $12 ones! LOVE them! :)

Unknown said...

amen and pass the mustard... so we can shoot it in these D bags eyes!!

Unknown said...

Uhhh..."Unknown"...probably wise to stay incognito as you, with your final comment, just bought yourself a pass along with "the guy" to the land of douches-n-asshats!!! As for nice, durable WELL MADE, comfy yoga pants...that will compliment most any average ass, withstand years of washing and being stretched to the moon and back...give NIKE a try!!! You can get them for under $20 at the Nike Outlet and Ross!

Melisa said...

Im just gonna guess your opinion of your ass is different than the person behind you.

Stephanie Nawyn said...

My favorite pants are Horny Toad brand. How can you not love them? They feel like butter and are long enough to go all the way down my leg. They are normally an expensive brand (not LLL level, but still) but I got them at a clearing sale. I don't really care how they make my ass look. They make my virabhadrasana II look great, and I can throw a skirt over them afterwards and go to work, luxuriating in their softness. To heck with LLL if they are making crap now.

Erin McDermid said...

I love my Walmart Danskin too! I went into LLL once realized they only went to size 12, and took my size 14 butt out! But noticed the clerk, who was much bigger than me, had squeezed on a pair... if you're gonna make your staff wear them, make them to fit!!

Starr said...

I've never understood why exercise pants would be so limited in size. Should us with the big booties have *more* options for gear in an effort to shrink them through exercise? This hot dog wants hot yoga pants!

KayLynn said...

If body shape was the problem then why did they recall them when this first was discovered?? I hope a PR person somewhere slapped him when this interview was over.

Wendy White Van said...

I absolutely love you. Can I marry you? You are my new favorite person!!

PrimpYourNails said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kim said...

I live under a rock, so I've never even heard of this company until this story hit Facebook (and I own one pair of yoga pants that I never wear because they're too long for my stumpy legs. Hubby meant well, though.) I think this asshat and the Abercrombie freakoid should get together and do lunch.

Sharon Greenthal said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sharon Greenthal said...

What's yoga? I don't think we have that in Southern California yet.

Nicole Leigh Shaw said...

You sometimes make me want to make out with you in a non-sexual way. Thank God you know me or this comment would be terribly awkward.

YouDon'tLook46 said...

Yep. On one hand, they're telling me to exercise and lose my big butt and on the other, it's but wear men's sweatpants?

JMc said...

You should know that anyone that prices a pair of yoga pants at $100+ a pop is going to be a douche. For $100 each they better do the yoga for me

Anonymous said...

Melisa Peh, that was awesome. Unknown, you may be right about the too many woman try to squeeze into smaller sizes, but that doesn't change the fact, that a $100 pair of pants should work better than a pair of $12 ones. If they are selling quality, then they are missing the mark, BIG TIME!!

Tracy said...

Well, I sort of felt like she wasn't too far off the mark with that comment--I mean, my yoga studio is in a concrete bunker. Aren't they all?

Carrie - ASassyRedhead.com said...

I must be living rough. Ain't no way in hell my yoga pants would consist of anything over $12.00 or I'll just consider my old sweat pants my new yoga pants.

$100. Give me a friggin break.

I better at least moan and groan in them for THAT price.

Unknown said...

Bahahahaha funniest shit I've read all day! And I've been reading ALOT today.

ShowMom said...

maybe that's where the lemon comes from in luluLEMON

LA Botchar said...

The very epitome of first world problems......our yoga pants don't fit us right. CEO fat shaming asshats aside, what we considering newsworthy this day stuns me.
I'd fall over in shock, but you know....concrete!

Anonymous said...

I love you, Jen. I just love you!

Me said...

Hmm. A new store: "Abercrombie and Asshat". They will sell mirrors. Only mirrors.

Katiesanoshow said...

Overzealous wearage ... I friggin love that! I wear the shit outta my yoga pants. Although my plus size behind doesn't look hot in anything stretched taut across it. So I opt for the gauchoey flowy pajamalike "yoga pants".

Baheera said...

Hmmm should have edited that befor I posted....Sorry for spelling grammer errors but I am sure everyone gets the message eh?

Unknown said...

I like to take it in the rear by over-paying for Thanksgiving pants, and then once again by being called irresponsible with concrete AND fat by the people getting rich off my terrible choices. Thanks, Lululemon!

Unknown said...

I'm wearing Danskin capris AS I TYPE THIS. Are lululemons really $100??? Now I have less respect for my friends who I know wear them.

AndreaEv_CSE said...

"...that doesn't change the fact, that a $100 pair of pants should work better than a pair of $12 ones."

If only.

Clothing is a non-durable good, and this pant is apparently Lululemon's top seller. Even if the company has slowly begun producing inferior quality goods, they've built a following of devotees that will repurchase the item; it's strategy that works because this behavior is reinforced in us at every turn. Unless you opt out of upgrading your smartphones, buying new cars, upgrading the operating system on your computers, you participate in the same behavior; believe me, there are thresholds of cost and usability meant to price you out of the market for high-end goods in each of these markets. Keep feeling good about buying those $12 yoga pants, though, you're really breaking the cycle.

Shelley Zurek -- Still Blonde after all these YEARS said...

I guess I would have to try them to see if they are worth $100 but you are right, the concept of stopping at 12 and making such remarks are insane.

Dana M Lane said...

lol I would never pay $100 for a pair of pants (of any kind) to begin with! If I'm paying that much for yoga pants, they better be doing the yoga FOR me!

Dana M Lane said...

Amen! lol

Elia said...

You better have someone check your ass, because you can see through danskin too.

Overachieving Elf on the Shelf Mommies

By now we have all heard of the adorable little Elf on the Shelf . Almost everyone I know has one.  Some people even have two!  (Now I'...

Popular Posts