It Might Be a Tumor

I just completed another week of my work out.  I've worked hard and been faithful every week.  How does my body repay me?  By rebelling.  I have a pain in my leg that has been bothering me since before I started this workout and now it just throbs all day long.  It was really bothering me Monday night and so I did what any normal person with pain would do.  I Googled it.

So, I came up with two possible diagnoses:

1.  Sciatica.  I heard horror stories about this debilitating condition while I was pregnant.  Every woman I came into contact with with regale me with her story of pregnancy-induced sciatica.  She would explain in detail how much it hurt and where and when and why.  Finally, she would tell me, the only relief was to deliver her 12 pound bundle of joy.  Since I am not pregnant - really, I'm not.  I know it seems like I'm giving a lot of weird symptoms and hints to doctors appointments that could imply I am pregnant, but I swear I am not - since I am not pregnant, I don't have a chance at relief if I can't deliver a 10+ pound baby!


So, it must be number two:

2.  It's a "toomer."  Why is it always a tumor?  I swear, I could tell Google that I have a bulge on my toe and Google would say it's either a corn or it's a tumor.  Sitting up at midnight reading about tumors is never pleasant to consider, so I scheduled an appointment with a masseuse so she could work on my sciatica.

When I arrived at my workout this week, I told Kris that I have sciatica - or a tumor - but either way she's killing me.  She laughed.  (Who laughs at a sick woman?)  "You don't have either," she explained.  "Your IT band is tight."

"I don't even think I have an IT band," I replied.  "It didn't come up in any of my Google searches."

"Yes you do!"

She showed me some (ridiculously painful) exercises (that are working) to help reduce the pain and told me stop diagnosing myself.

She's worth every penny.


Photo: fitsugar

24 comments:

jgtck said...

Share the exercises please. I have had sciatica problems for a long time and would love some relief.

Kris said...

Do you have to roll on the - dum, dum, dum - Styrofoam Roller of Death?? That thing hurts like hell.

Amanda said...

YES! This!

Danie said...

I suffer from sciatica frequently and there is other relief out there than delivering a baby. Sciatica is caused by a pinched nerve that's most likely related to a weak and deformed spine(I have lordosis which is an inward curvature of the lumbar spine). Going to the chiropractor has always helped me in the past and anti-arthritic medications like celebrex.

Karyn C said...

Half of my husband's foot is numb so, he googled it. He either has diabetes and needs to have his foot amputated or he is having the world's slowest stroke. Just so you know, everything he has (even hangovers)are life threating because he doesn't have a spleen!

Soapy said...

I have a friend who sometimes makes the mistake of going to Webmd whenever she is ill, bless her. I had to tell her, "Honey Webmd is not your friend!" Like you, I also learned recently that Google isn't your friend either.
I had similar pains that you described, Googled and thought it was a blood clot. I promptly freaked out that I could drop at any moment and went to the ER. Mind you I have atrial fibrillation which can put me at risk for one (even though, knock on wood, I have never had it.) The ER Dr. chuckled a little at my panic and said, "Joanne, your going to be just fine. It's Sciatica."
As a sidenote, pregnant or not, Sciatica will lay you out! Dreadful stuff right there! Hope you feel better.

Anonymous said...

I hear you Jen! I'm in hte same place with my trainer and I have to roll my legs on the styrofoam rods of death!!! Oh....it will feel once you get used to it they say! Pfft....that thing hurts like a bitch! Feel good my ass! Stretching before and after is my suggestion. Stretch like crazy! Helps to lessen the soreness. Although I seem to be all over sore like I'm 80 years old! Well, excuse me I have to get up from my chair and hobble over to the bathroom! Hang in there!

Jenn @ Something Clever 2.0 said...

Thanks for scaring the crap out of me with that title. I'm glad you don't have a tumor.

Lori said...

What a relief that it might not be a "toomer"!

Meredith said...

When my daughter was undergoing testing and diagnosis of her severe neutropenia her hematologist told me I was NOT to Google anything. She actually gave me her cell number so if I felt panicky I could call her instead of looking online. I never called her, but she managed to stop me from feeling convinced my baby was dying because of Dr. Google.

Anonymous said...

I've self-banned myself from webMD and all similar sites since I discovered I have a severe self-diagnosing problem which emerged with my first pregnancy. My ob finally ordered my husband to remove the "What to Expect" book from my hands and get rid of it! LOL

L. Shanna said...

Acupuncture is the only thing that's worked for acute pain for me. I look forward to a post about it ;)

Eileen said...

IT band issues are the worst! Foam rolling should help, as painful as it can be. My hip/back/leg problems were really helped by my chiropractor. I have to admit I'm a big fan of the doctor of the "dark arts" :)

Good luck with it and keep working out. Showing up is half the battle some days!

Maya said...

So sorry you had to be in pain, but yay for exercising and not backin' down! Everyone should have a Kris :)

Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous said...

Oh no! Google self diagnosis is always a terrible idea! Put down the laptop and step away from the search engine!

Julia K said...

The thing is, you never know. My grandma started having leg pains in March. It got to the point where she could barely walk. When she finally went in to get it checked out (sometime in June) it turned out that she has uterine cancer. It had grown around the nerve in her leg, and that's why her leg was so bad. Luckily, surgery was able to get the tumor out from around her nerve, but she's going through chemo and radiation to try to kill it off.

Now that I've made everyone here super paranoid, there's a moral to this story. If you are having persistent undiagnosed pain, go see a doctor! If my grandma wasn't one of those people who hate seeing doctors, then she would have been diagnosed so much earlier and wouldn't be battling stage 3 uterine cancer. Most of the time it's nothing, but you never know.

Dyanne @ I Want Backsies said...

Due to exuberant zumba-ing, I developed IT band issues. And I didn't even know I HAD an IT band until then (although I sure know it now!). I didn't get my diagnosis from Google, though. I got it the old-fashioned way - asked someone who has had hip problems and let HER diagnose me. Her dad is a veterinarian, which qualifies her as a diagnostician in my book.

Lea said...

I too did not know I had an IT band until I started yoga with a new "yogi" this summer. WOWZA those stretches hurt....but in a good way! Hope you find some relief!

Tazi Kat said...

Oh! A tight IT (iliotibial) band is torture! You must be barely able to walk! Massage works amazing for loosening this up - one treatment is all you need!

Steph at Im Still Learning said...

I kid you not, I've been having what I have self-diagnosed as sciatica for the past few weeks. But good to know it could also be a tumor. I did a yoga class last week which helped tremendously, for about 3 days. Then it came back. I guess it's time to go to my masseuse!

Savanna said...

Bahahahahahahaha! I laughed so hard I almost wet myself.

Unknown said...

Same here! When my son was diagnosed with a brain tumor, his surgeon purposely didn't tell me the name of the type of tumor until after the emergency surgery, because as he said, "...you'll just spend the entire surgery Googling it if I do, and you'll get all the wrong info." I was offended at first, but SO grateful a month later when I finally did Google search it; I would have spent those 12 hours of surgery bawling my eyes out, thinking there was no way he could live!

Anonymous said...

I JUST posted on my blog about my mad diagnostic skillz (some may call it hypochondria). The FurFiles sent me this way, I guess because she though we'd bond over our mutual fear and loving of Google. All the best with your future tumors.

Stephanie R said...

Now, I have to Google and WebMD to see what the heck an IT band is...never heard of it. Thanks, Jen!

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