People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Ultimate Blog Party 2012 Welcome


Ultimate Blog Party 2012 Welcome

Hey!  If you're reading this, then I assume you found me at the Ultimate Blog Party 2012.  Thanks for coming by.  It looks like you found me.  (If you didn't find me that way, then I'll fill you in.  UBP is a really cool idea where a bunch of blogs link up together.  We write a little intro - that's what this is - and then we just jump around and visit each other.  I really enjoy the UBP, because I get to find all kinds of new and fun blogs so I highly recommend heading over to 5 Minutes for Mom and checking it out.)  OK, back my intro.

I'm Jen.  I rant more than I write.  I have a potty mouth and I drop F-bombs a lot.  Many of my readers claim we were separated at birth, long lost BFFs or we share a brain.

I live in Kansas.  It doesn't blow as much as you would think.  I've lived in New Jersey and New York and Iowa and Illinois before and I can say that Kansas isn't the worst place I've lived.

I have two fairly well-behaved offspring that I'm hoping will someday be contributing members of society.  One's a boy and one's a girl.  I call them Gomer and Adolpha on here.  They have worse names in real life, I promise.  They're two years apart and share a birthday, so that makes them more rare than normal twins.

I write so I won't kill.

This blog is called People I Want to Punch in the Throat not Rainbows & Unicorns.  I'm a funny, negative, bitchy type of person.  If you can't handle that, then it's been real.  Thanks for stopping by, but don't waste your time flaming me for being a grouch.

Also, this blog is a JOKE.  It's meant to be funny and satirical.  You don't have to take me seriously, because I don't take myself seriously.

If this sounds like your kind of thing and you're still here and you want more, you can see more about me here and here.

I have a Hubs, we met cute.  You can read about that here.  I have a crush on Tina Fey and I want a minivan and I hate elves on shelves.

I've been published on and I write for

I'm working on a book.  It's not done yet.  I don't know when it will be done.  I have a deadline in mind, but I'm afraid to put it here, because when I make it I'll look like an overachiever and when I miss it I'll look like a loser.  Let's just say that once it's done, you'll be the first to know.

You can follow me on Facebook or Twitter and you can see what I did this week here.

If you laugh out loud, almost pee yourself or spit out your drink when you read my blog, do the world a favor and share it.

Thanks for stopping by!!


  1. Although I did not find you through them I did find them through you. As a thanks I put a link to you in my blog post. Happy Hopping!

  2. I've been following your blog for quite some time, but I was excited to see that you are participating in UBP. A friend just told me about it last night, and I decided to give it a try, too. I hope you have fun and find some great new blogs to follow. :)

  3. I'm so glad you're partying! I also lived in Iowa and Illinois. I found you after the elf on the shelf this place! PArty On!

  4. I have you on my reading list, but I'll definitely go check out 5 minutes for mom :)

    Thank you!

  5. You're actually in the bloglist on my blog, so I really like your style!

  6. I am doing the A-Z challenge, and we are just now at the half way point. Sounds like this is just a rip off of that.

  7. I used to live in Kansas City... it's actually a really nice place for being land locked :) Love your blog and your snarkiness :)

  8. Don't tell your mental deadline, they said on the radio the other week if you announce goals like new years resolutions and whatnot you are less likely to achieve it because announcing it give a false sense of accomplishment...

  9. LOVE YOUR BLOG and your "writing style" LOL!!! Found you thru the UBP! Looking forward to following your adventures! Happy Monday!

    Kristine from TheFoleyFam - Unedited

  10. Found you through UBP and love your humor. Also crushing on Tina Fey, though I have to take issue with the minivan. It only works if you get those little stickers on the back that show your family holding hands. Thanks for the laugh Jen! Will be following....

  11. DigitalDiva21:08

    SERIOUSLY??? I honestly thought I was going to get to the end of your post and read that this was all one big 'ha ha' and that you weren't really part of the 'linky' bunch (that you had better things to do with your time, like search out Consumer Report ratings on the 2013 mini-vans, etc.). Boy, was I shocked to find out you were dead serious. Though I won't be hopping around (I've got better things to do with my time, like getting to the bottom of who left that suspicious brown skid mark on the bedroom carpet), I will continue reading your blog. I mean, we all deserve an 'off' day now and then.

    Keep the writing real, it's what makes us come back for more.

  12. I like your blog and this post was a great introduction. I also really like Tina Fey and her book "Bossypants" is the last book I read - it's great - as was your Valentine's post about/to her!

  13. I found you at last years UBP. So I win. Neener! Neener! :p

    My favorite part of this UBP post...when it showed up in my email inbox, at the bottom of the post is this giant hot pink and purple tampon ad. I'm glad Google Ads thinks I need a printable coupon for the lady products. :)

  14. holy crap, i want to punch people in the face daily. why am i just coming across your blog now?

    ps - stopping by from the UBP. looking forward to reading more of your rants.

    ugh, what i really want to do is punch blogger's stupid word verification because it absolutely HATES my typepad ID :(

  15. Lara20:39

    I've only been reading for a week, but if we weren't both married, and if I were a lesbian, I would totally make out with you. You complete me. (But I DESPISE Tom Cruise, so the fact that you make me want to quote him makes me want to punch YOU in the throat...)

  16. Oh I love a funny girl! I found you on Circle of Moms, and then saw this UBP post, so I thought I'd say hello here. I'm off to click around.

  17. Don't we all write so we won't kill? LOL Found you and started following through the blog party :-) If you have a moment you can find me at