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Douchey Dad Revisited

'Guest post from The Hubs'

Apparently Jen hit a douchey nerve with her previous post.

I had no idea Jen had so many Douchey Dad readers and that they cared so much what she thinks or writes.  Before Jen started writing I never even heard of or read a blog before.  I think I was too busy on the golf course with my Douchey Dad friends.  Now that she has found a great audience and her voice, I fully support her writing and her sharp wit - even if she makes me look like a bitch sometimes.

Douchey Dads

I attended an auction at a chic country club.  I arrived early to help the organizers set up and I was surprised to find the bar full of young, well dressed (if you can call expensive plaid shorts well dressed), golf playing, thousands of dollars a year for dues paying men sitting around drinking and yukking it up.  I wanted to say, "Hey...where do you guys work that you can spend half of a Tuesday golfing at this expensive club?"  (I also wanted to hand all of them my real estate business card, because these guys look like the type who might need a good divorce attorney and Realtor in their Rolodex's at all times.)

Live Free (and Compost) or Die

Today Mary and her kids showed me around the great state of New Hampshire.  I've only ever driven through New Hampshire on my way to the outlets in Kittery, Maine so it was nice to see what treasures lurk just off the highway.

Mary's kids are on Spring Break (Winter Break?  I don't know.  Some break the whole state has off.)  We decided we go to Dover to a children's museum her kids like.

We got to the museum and I fit right in.  New Hampshire are my people.  I've said before I dress/look like a plus sized model in an Eddie Bauer catalog - pg. 92 to be exact.  The moms in New Hampshire look just like me.  I was welcomed into a cocoon of fleece and canvas and sturdy, practical shoes today.  It was like coming home.  Ahhhh....no over achievers, right?

The Worst Interview I've Ever Had

The other night, the Hubs and I watched that new show "Girls" on HBO.  Hubs isn't sure what he thought of it, but I could relate to it.  There was one part where the main character is sitting in a job interview and the interview is going great.  She's impressing her future boss, he's enjoying her sense of humor and he's thisclose to hiring her and then she blows it by saying something completely weird and inappropriate.

The Hubs said, "Oh I don't believe that.  No one would say something so stupid in an interview."

The Parents Who Ruined the Easter Egg Hunt

Seriously?  WTF, people?  Pushy parents went so far last year at a Colorado Easter egg hunt that this year, the organizers are just cancelling it.  They don't want to deal with the annoying, asshole parents who went crazy trying stealing Easter eggs from little kids.  It's a joke, right?  Nope.  Not at all.

One asshat was quoted as saying:  "You have all these eggs just lying around and parents helping out.  You better believe I'm going to help my kid get one of those eggs.  I promised my kid an Easter egg hunt and I'd want to give him an even edge."  (This guy isn't even a father.  He took his friend's son.  I fear for the world once this guy starts procreating.)


I guess because I have younger kids, I only ever see the overachieving moms (OAM) at the over the top birthday parties or designing elaborate concoctions for school lunches. I forgot about the children the overachievers have been raising long before I started having kids. I didn't think about the high school-aged children of the OAMs. That's why I was surprised last week when I read an article about "promposals."

The Hubs' Ego

One morning the Hubs and I were watching the news and there was a story about a family fishing and as they were reeling their fish into the boat, a shark came out of nowhere and bit the fish off the line.  They showed the video and the Hubs said, "Ha!  Forget the fish, I'd go after that shark!"

"What?" I said.

People Who Post Annoying Things on Facebook

There are a lot of annoying posts on Facebook. I know we've all done these, but somehow they're not annoying when WE do them, right? Ha. Let's see if I can cover the basics:

1.  Anything to do with vomit and/or diarrhea.  WTH?  Who shares this stuff?  Why did you think we needed to know this?  At least it's usually it's kid-centered - I can handle that a lot better than I can hearing about YOUR diarrhea!  "Guess who woke up early from his nap and spread his poo poo all over the wall?  Uh oh.  Silly, King!  I'll post pictures later! ;)"

Open Letter to Rob Lowe

Rob Lowe has an interview in the New York Times Magazine titled Rob Lowe on the Problems With Being Pretty. Rob feels like no one took him seriously when he was a young heartthrob because he was too pretty and I don't think that was the case at all. I've written him a letter.

Goody Bags that are Nicer than the Gift My Kid Gave

We all know that birthday parties have become outrageous and ultra-competitive - that's yesterday's news.  The new frontier is the dreaded goody bag.

The goody bag has always been the bastard of the birthday party.  It's a throw away.  An afterthought.  Because it's the bastard it's always been full of cheap junk or teeth rotting candy.  It's a small token that says, I just paid about twelve to fifteen bucks for your kid to come celebrate my kid's birthday and we appreciate your $12-25 gift so here is your bag of shit.  Thanks for coming and see you next month at your kids' party!