'Guest post from The Hubs'
Apparently Jen hit a douchey nerve with her previous post.
I had no idea Jen had so many Douchey Dad readers and that they cared so much what she thinks or writes. Before Jen started writing I never even heard of or read a blog before. I think I was too busy on the golf course with my Douchey Dad friends. Now that she has found a great audience and her voice, I fully support her writing and her sharp wit - even if she makes me look like a bitch sometimes.
Well, I want to answer some of the Douchey Dads, because they obviously need and want the attention, so I am going to give it to them. If you are reading this and you are a dad - a douchey one, I just have to say one thing: "What the fuck?" Why would you waste your precious time reading a chick blogger that you don't even know? I understand why the ladies and the great dads read the blog. It's because they can relate to and understand the sarcasm and recognize the humor in their lives. I read Jen because she is my wife. But for the Douchey Dad, "You sir need to get a life and stop being a total and complete douche."
Here is my theory on why the Douchey Dads are coming out and the OAMs are coming out as well. The Douchey Dad is embarrassed that he is such a douche, and the OAM wife is really embarrassed that she is married to a complete and total douche and now everyone knows it. They make up the complete family sized douche canoe. The Douchey Dad feels bad that he has completely missed out on his kids' childhood and does not want to be called out and the OAM is overcome with guilt that she has allowed this to happen, but the only choice she has is to "stand by her man." Well, guess what? Your Douchey Dad husband will always be a douche because you don't tell him not to be one. Hey, Douchey Dad, you still have a chance not to be a douche, but my guess is you are too douchey to even recognize that.
Someone thinks that we are jealous of their lives. If you think I am jealous of playing golf all day with a bunch of douchey guys sitting around talking about total and complete bullshit, you are wrong. I have spent time with these douche bags, and they are not all bad, just some of them, but I still don't want their lives.
As for being rich equates to being a douche...that is not the case at all. Lots of wealthy guys who belong to country clubs are great dads and not douche bags, but there is a subset of the population that happens to have money and they are total and complete Douchey Dads. Case in point, the Douchey Dad who Jen wrote about and the Douche Dads who got all upset after the post and whined about it.
Douchey Dads will wonder, why is the Hubs writing a response to us? Where's Jen? She can fight her own battles. Well, that is very true. Jen did not even want to talk about this anymore because it was over and she felt like those guys were jackholes and didn't warrant a response from her. But I felt that the Douchey Dad really needed more inspection and attention, so I wanted to write this. After all, I want to fully understand why someone is such a douche.
As for any more Douchey Dad comments, feel free to let the world know just how much of a loser Douchey Dad you really are. We love your pageviews and your douchey ways. All of the readers love to see them because they show us of what a true Douchey Dad is all about.
Also, if you are playing along...Douche or Douchey has been used 34 times in this post, so drink up!
If you want to read about some NON-DOUCHEY Dads check out this new book.
Okay, so if you've been following me for a while, then you know that I live in Kansas City. I don't know if you heard or not, b...
So I'm pretty sure I'm going through a midlife crisis. I feel like I'm falling apart. I feel like the more I try to keep fro...
My friend Kim at Let Me Start By Saying wrote an essay that was featured on the Huffington Post . It was about reading her five-year-old...
So far since I started this blog no one has outright flamed me and called me a jerk, but I think today might be that day. I know many of...