Showing posts with label Teen Mom sucks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Teen Mom sucks. Show all posts

Open Letter to PR Reps Who Write to Me

Dear (insert your name here):

Oh, I'm sorry, did that offend you?  How about I just address this letter:  Dear PR Rep.  It's about as personal as Dear Blogger or my favorite:  Dear [ ] - you would get a bit further next time if you actually put a name in there, dipshit.

Every day I get several emails from PR reps asking me to shill absolute shite.  Most of the times the product has absolutely nothing to do with the topics I write about or my readers.

My suggestion to you, dear PR Rep, is to actually read my blog and some of the comments before you start in with your bullshit about your "extreme interest" in my "well-written" site.  Are you kidding me with that?  Every other word on here is fuck or douche.  I think an English professor just died somewhere when she heard what you said about my blog.

photo:  freedigitalphotos.net

If you took a moment to read one or two of my posts, you would realize that I have absolutely no interest in "spreading the word or telling" my readers about:

a.  Your shitty book about the terrible side effects of television on kids.  I think we got the message a while ago.  While you were busy writing this book, it was all over the television.  Go figure.

b.  Your "exciting and informative" new daytime talk show that is debuting soon.  Daytime talk is where most stars go to die.  Unless you are Ellen or Oprah I'm not buying what you're selling. 

c.  Boring interviews.  Yes, I have children, but that does not mean I want to actually interview a child psychologist for my blog.  Maybe you should call the daytime talk show people it sounds like your cup of tea.

d.  Comic books.  Did I give the impression that I read comics?  Because I don't read comic books, I've never once mentioned comic books or anything remotely like that so don't ask me to pimp your stupid comic book.  Yeah, I'm a dorky "Star Wars" fan and a Twi-Mom and a Harry Potter fan, but I have to draw the line somewhere.  I don't do comic books.

e.  Interviews with F-list celebri-trash.  Let me be clear, Mister PR Rep, I have absolutely no fucking desire to interview your crappy F-list client slash reality star about breast feeding tips or parenting tips or whatever your client thinks she's an expert on this week.  This is especially true for you, PR Rep to Teen Mom 2 breakout star Chelsea Houska.  


I do not pretend to be a parenting expert nor do I think I have this parenting thing all figured out.  However, I do know that I have a much better handle on it than your 20 year old client.  I would rather kill myself than listen to her "mommy tips."  I can only imagine what she could teach us.  It must be hard for her to juggle her budding career as a reality star slash wanna be Playboy centerfold slash beauty school drop out along with motherhood and dating.  


If I ever need to learn how to make horrible decisions, pick shitty boyfriends, look sexy in Twitter self pics and not pay my bills, I'll be sure to look her up.  

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