Back to School



School starts Thursday and I am only a little bit excited.  OK, I'm really excited. This will be the first time in almost 8 years that I will have a house to myself all day long.  (The Hubs will be here too, but luckily we each keep to our own "area".)

There is nothing I love more than my alone time.  I absolutely love a quiet house.

I'm talking pretty tough today, because it's only Wednesday.  We'll see how I feel tomorrow.  All week long as we've edged closer to Thursday I've been thinking about Adolpha heading to all day Kindergarten and every now and again I become a blubbering mess.

Having both kids in elementary school will start a new chapter in our lives.  We'll no longer be preschool parents.  We'll have "school aged" children now with "school aged" problems.

I remember when Gomer went off to Kindergarten a sweet, loving, kind and gentle little boy and came home a rough and tumble stranger who called me "Dude."  Really, he called me "dude" on his first day home from school.

"How was school, Gomer?"

"It was awesome, dude.  Oops, I mean, Mom."

When I put him to bed that first night, my little boy cried and told me that his must-have-super-cool-light-up-Velco-Sketchers were "baby" shoes and "everyone" made fun of them.  "No one wears Velcro anymore and light up shoes are stupid," he sobbed.  He'd been told that Reeboks or Nikes were the only acceptable footwear from here on out.

I learned my lesson two years ago, so this time I am sending Adolpha to school barefoot.  I've decided to let her get the lay of the land first before we commit to a pair of shoes.  Who knows what girls wear??

Honestly, it probably wouldn't even faze Adolpha.  She's so secure in her (odd ball) style that if someone critiqued her shoes she'd probably call their ripped-from-the-latest-Gap-ad look "pedestrian and uninspired," flip her hair at them and move on with her bad self.

I'm also not going to worry about her vocabulary.  She already knows "dude" and "awesome" thanks to her brother.  Along with gems like "loser" and "awkward."  Good thing I'm not worrying, because tonight at her first soccer practice they were trying to come up with a team name and many of the girls suggested names like The Dolphins or The Rainbows.  Not my kid, she offered her ideal team name:  The Toilet Princesses.  (I'd like to apologize in advance to the parents of her classmates who are the eldest in their families.  She's going to educate them on Thursday.  Don't judge.  Your youngest will do it someday as well.)

When Gomer went to Kindergarten, he was nervous and he would have been happy staying in preschool for the rest of his life.  (He still talks about those glory days when he could spend entire days building Legos and singing songs without the "pressures" of weekly spelling tests and math homework.  I don't have the heart to tell the kid about high school and college.)

Adolpha isn't nervous.  She has been begging to go to Kindergarten since she was three.  Last year she was down right pissed when she saw friends of hers going off to elementary school and she was relegated to the dungeons of preschool for yet another year.  I will be shocked if she cries, but you never know with her.  Either way it will probably break my heart a bit.  If she cries, I'll feel horrible that I'm sending my baby off to school and I didn't "prepare" her as well as I did her brother.  If she doesn't cry, I'll feel horrible that I've raised a kid who doesn't give a shit about me.  Either way, I lose.

Gomer is excited to see his friends, but he's not looking forward to sitting still all day.  I've done a terrible job making his summer structured and organized.  He's going to have a rough start back to school.  Good thing he only needs to go two days this week.

We're as ready as we're going to be.  We've bought all the school supplies (I do have the requested number of glue sticks, but they are the "purple" ones that we were specifically told not to buy - there were no other choices at any store.  I figured purple was better than none.  I didn't have to get a poly AND a plastic folder this year, but I did have to go to three different stores just to find the required "yellow" folder), we got haircuts, and the laundry is done so everyone (Adolpha) can have several "favorite" outfits to choose from for the first day of school.

While Adolpha is dreaming of what perfect outfit to wear on Thursday and Gomer is deciding between his Reeboks or his Nikes, I am already planning my first day home alone.

After my crying jag, I'm sure my mother will call to get the low down on how drop off went, I'll post the obligatory first day of school pics on Facebook and bore the shit out of my friends with updates like "Adolpha is such a big girl now.  I can't believe how fast she's grown!" and "Gomer is my little man!" and then I'll probably watch inappropriate TV all day in my underwear.  I never get to watch "grown up" shows during the day and I miss that.  The underwear part is just BECAUSE I CAN.

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58 comments:

mod mom beyond indiedom said...

I feel your pain/joy. My little guy is starting first grade, so it will be the first year both of my kids are in school full time. Mixed emotions, but my little guy is ready and I think I might be too. So...what inappropriate tv are we watching? Pass the Ben & Jerry's, cause we get to eat things we'd normally hide from them too. In daylight!

Shelley in So. IL said...

I sent my bundles of joy off to school today and while I loved playing this summer, I too will be watching lots of shows that shout FUCK without worrying if the kids can hear it two rooms away. Because I am the winner mom who watches the inappropriate shows with her kids at home! While I fold the laundry. At least that is what I tell my husband when he gets home to piles of folded clothes all around his side of the bed...

Teri said...

I actually kind of like your hubs' site...not much writing that I can see, but still some funny stuff on there!

Anonymous said...

I am celebrating this school year because I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT! My baby (of three boys) graduated in June so I've been doing the *Happy Dance* past all those back to school sales and laughing evilly.

Mwahhahahahahaha!

Mexmom said...

In my case school starting back means more running for me since I work outside the home and besides the running in my own house, the traffic going to work is horrible and I have like 3 schools on the way slowing it.

Anonymous said...

On my oldests first day of K I was standing outside the school giddy with anticipation with some other parents. Could not wait to find out about his day. My son came out and was milling around with some of his friends, so I chatted it up with the other waiting parents. Oh, aren't they cute. Did you do OK today? Were there tears this morning? Looked up and my son was peeing on a tree. Welcome to elementary school.

Second kid was much easier. My favorite thing about not having the kids home during the day is afternoon movies. Movies without paying a babysitter is one of the things I have missed since having kids. Now you can have that back.

Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom said...

I have a 9-y-o and a 5-y-o, who is off to all day kindergarten in a couple of weeks. So I'm with you on that whole "I have school-age kids" vibe. I told my daughter today that she had only 6 days left of pre-kindergarten to which she replied, "Good! I hate that rainy-day-boring-baby school!" Guess she's ready for the big time! Me...maybe not so much. Pass the kleenex box when you're done with it.

Jen Z said...

DON'T GET SUCKED INTO DAYTIME TV!!

I love my stay at home momness. I was the "rolling stop" mom when I dropped them off at school those first days. Now that they're going into middle school, I'm having these bouts of wistfulness here and there (though I LOVE LOVE LOVE my quiet house.

Don't spend all your "alone" time with hubs sequestered to your own areas of the house... These years are perfect for reigniting your marriage and remembering why you fell in love in the first place.

Sarah said...

Ok glad I'm not the only weird that likes a quiet house! I live alone but in an apartment building so "quiet house" is rarer than one might think. Enjoy your first day of "freedom"!

Sarah said...

Peeing on the tree! omg to funny! laughed at that one!

Anonymous said...

I'm the mom of an only child and the first day of kindergarten I felt like dancing naked on the front lawn!! (I didn't do it out of deference to delicate neighbors).

I liked my kid much better when he was in high school. Just nice being around an easy going young adult rather than a needy elementary boy who followed the crowd when he wasn't supposed to. He'll be 21 this year and I'm thrilled with the young man he's become.

Look back on these years as the start of them separating from you and growing into amazing, competent, adults. You'll survive this, we all do.

Anonymous said...

ENJOY!!! Been there, done that, love it!

Sandra said...

I cant find the damn yellow folder either!!!!!!! Good luck and congratulations!

Anonymous said...

Excellent advice!

Kelly and Sne said...

This is our first foray in the public school system as my son starts Kindergarten also this week. My daugther is going to the school districts pre-school - of course at a different school - but I don't count that. And yes my life has already become much more complex starting with that school supply list (the schedule is so complex that it makes my brain hurt - I am starting to understand how parents accidentally leave their kids in the car or forget to pick them up at school...). I am so going to get "schooled" myself as a parent of a new elementary school kid.

Sherman said...

I remember when our youngest went off to kindergarten, the house was SILENT. It was deafening. I thought I'd be doing cartwheels down the street when the bus left, but I was sad. It was horrible. I hated it, even though I couldn't wait for it to happen. Now our youngest is in her junior year of college. They're never home. It doesn't get better, it'll get worse.

Rain said...

I hope the drop offs go well...it's so bittersweet!

Rachel said...

Ready for school?!? HELL NO! I'm a teacher.

Kinnynick said...

It is like you looked deep into my soul and discovered the true me. All I have been talking about all week is how I plan to watch shows with cussing while wearing only a ratty t-shirt and the comfortable underwear, and eating ice cream. All. Day. Long.

Julie said...

What kind of school gives out the supply list weeks in advance? Two of my boys start back on Monday (2nd and K) and we don't even find out their freaking teacher assignments until tomorrow evening! Which, incidentally is when we get that dreaded supply list, which is to be fulfilled by Monday. C to the RAP.

Anonymous said...

I will be ok tomorrow, I'm always ok the first day of school since I have been home with them for the entire summer. It's totally ok with me to give them to someone else to entertain. I do hope she doesn't pull out any of her brothers 9 year old vocabulary on the first day. Last year a mom in her class was complaining to me because the little girl told her dad he "sucked". I looked her straight in the eye and said I'm sorry, I'm sure she learned it from my daughter. Oops!

Anonymous said...

Wow. Don't be such a "Debbie Downer." Eventually, our kids HAVE to grow up and lead their own lives and they start taking those baby steps to independence when they start school. Use that extra time you have on your hands to cultivate activities that YOU enjoy.

neal said...

I've got years left before my toddler is ready for all-day school. But that doesn't stop me from dreaming about it.

I had a dream the other night about taking her to school for the first time. It was glorious and bizarre, since there were dinosaurs involved.

The night before it was dwarfs and dragons and first dates. And it was NOT glorious. I'd like to wait another 18 years before I have to worry about this one.

Anonymous said...

My daughter had the super-cool-light-up-Sketchers too. They were FABULOUS! I would've wear those shoes if they made them in my size. And she love-love-loved them...til the first week of school. She got nicknamed "Baby Feet" and that stuck with her through two years of school now. She does have tiny feet, though, so that has something to do with it. Anyway, she never wore the shoes again. I could've kicked some Kindergartener butt for that.

Anonymous said...

The Tater starts kindergarten in 2 weeks...I'm not ready. She is.

I'm sharing the Versatile Blogger award with you because I absolutely love your blog..makes perfect sense to me.
Carry on!
http://lipstickmargaritasandhairspray.com/2012/08/15/thank-you-thank-you-very-much/

Anonymous said...

Ah, the memories you bring forth. Wait until they leave home for good--- then you can watch TV naked. ah, who am I kidding? you can clean naked, cook naked, read a book naked, write your blog naked... just remember to shut the blinds!

spymay said...

I'm counting the days until school starts next year.
I was in the promised land with both kids in school and they didn't need me to entertain them or help them with homework very much...and then SURPRISE!! I got pregnant with my 3rd child four years ago.
So next year I'll have a kindergartener, a high school freshman, and a high school senior.Lord help me.

spymay said...

Just don't cook bacon naked-that hurts!

Anna said...

LOL (and I never write LOL) at sending her barefoot.

Anna See said...

Ah! The well-deserved freedom of having both in school at the same time. I like the undies plan. When mine went both went to elem school, I took 2 years off to decompress.

Karen said...

And make sure it's jut underpants. Don't even bother with a bra.

Car Mama said...

It's good you know that the kids will be fine, and that you're the one with the issues. I, too, LOVE any time I can be alone in our home. So if my husband were to go back to school with the kids next week, that would be excellent -- he works from home and we share an office. I like to write my car reviews in the quiet with some mellow music; he has a stand-up desk, talks all day on the phone, and paces while he does so. By the time the kids get home and want homework help, I'm fried! Maybe I'll sign up my husband to be the Room Parent for our 3rd Grader...

Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous said...

Enjoy your well deserved freedom ... and your semi nude tv watching!

lorihokie said...

ack! you said "little man"! I thought we had an agreement about that!

But thanks for the warning about the "oldest kid" learning new stuff - my oldest is starting Kindergarten after Labor Day and I'm sure I'll be in for a surprise at what she learns that first week.

TNMom said...

Yeah, the "transition period" where the oldest is in school and the youngest is not, is tough!! Some of the toughest years I've had. I, by no means, am trying to rush my baby off to school (still have 3 more years, as she has a winter birthday), but it sure will be nice when they both go to the same general location with the same general schedule and goal. I can definitely see where it is going to be a glorious day, but I am going to CRY LIKE A BABY GETTING A SHOT!! Good luck today Jenn, and everyone!
Devan

medicmom said...

We are in Alabama and the legislature passed a new law. Kids can't go back to school more than 2 weeks before Labor Day and must be out by Memorial Day. My kid would have been back in school almost 2 weeks without that little gem of a law. I love my kids; I seriously do but my 9 yo boy came in our room and jumped, yes jumped, into our bed at 615, then got pouty when we told him it was too early to be in our room. My alarm had just gone off but I enjoy the snooze button. I also have a 1 yo, the school won't take him. Monday is our back to school day so no more mommy planning out fun activities that the oldest sulks through! I LOVE BACK TO SCHOOL. And the first 2 weeks of summer!

Anonymous said...

Ok, Toilet Princesses? LOL!!!!!!

Susan said...

I can totally relate to this, except my 3 year old is starting Pre-school. He has learned this summer from his 7 year old sister, such gems as...Poo-poo head, eat my boogers and later, Dorks!! I am sure he will be educating the other children in his Christian pre-school class. I am a very proud mother!!!

Cat York said...

"I'm going to send her barefoot." LOL! Hope the first day goes well for everyone. Take care.

Jessica said...

My youngest will be starting preschool this year where he will be corrupting all of the children who are the oldest in the family with his talk of butt cracks. Happy child free days of staying in your underwear to you!

Jensational said...

Careful, Jen! Now that you and the hubs have all that extra alone time, you just might wind up with a new little one to chase after! Hehehehe.

Amanda said...

Now I am terrified that the money I just spent in another country, at a store we don't have at home, on the must have "special light up princess sneakers," will be for naught. My soon to start 2nd grader insisted on them, and this is the first time I have given into super ugly shoes, and I am praying her friends don't notice how hideous they are, because I really don't want to have to go out and buy her new shoes...

Mary said...

The Toilet Princesses is priceless. I almost want to steal it for something. When my daughter finished her first day of kindergarten we walked through the school yard to the car and she looked up at me and asked, "So tomorrow do I do first grade?" That's how much I prepared my kid. Hope you had fun watching bad TV! Sometimes that's all we need.

Anonymous said...

People I would like to punch in the throat are moms who can homeschool their childre, but don't, and let their children get brainwashed by the government schools while they sit around doing nothing all day. Your kids are better off being homeschooled instead of being sent to Public or Private schools, it is a statistical fact that they'll be smarter and more well balanced. You just are going to sit around the house all day? Give me a break, if you don't have to work, you should be homeschooling your children.

Laina said...

Mine used to come home with me at the end of the school year.

Beth Dancy said...

Totally funny! I have a sophomore and a senior! How did that happen??!! Anonymous, really?? Lost your humor much??

Tia French said...

Mine did a B.M in the urinal first day of kindergarten. He had no idea what it was just assumed it was all good. He was devistated when the teacher discovered what he had done.

Jen said...

We find out teacher assignment on the last day of school and the supply lists are posted on the school website in July. They are also available at Wal-Mart and Target. They have all the supply lists for the school districts around here printed out to pick up at the store.

Sandi McLean said...

When our kids were in elementary they didn't get their classroom/teacher assignments until the end of the first full week of classes - what a crazy-making waste of time for everyone (I don't miss that part). Enjoy the panty dance, and cherish the swelling heart that goes with the tears - you've earned both.

Anonymous said...

...barefoot, lmao. Uh, for 'Anonymous' above. Pretty judgey. Sit around all you want, Jen, you've earned it. And I'm looking forward to the funny posts you'll come up with after the plethora of sh*t you'll discover on TV tomorrow!! ;)

Erika Donahue said...

When my kids were young our PTO had a Boo Hoo, Yahoo coffee for Kindergarten parents on the first day.....

Deborah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Deborah said...

Deborah12:48
The second best thing about the kids' going off to school for the first time was the chance to read a whole chapter, even a whole book, without having to lock myself in the bathroom or stay up past midnight and drag through the next day on minimal sleep. The best thing about their going off to school was being there when they got home and told me the stories of their wonderful and sometimes painful interactions with the great, big world out there. My baby is 37, and I still love hearing her stories .

JuniperSunshine said...

D-: God, that anonymous twit is annoying! Well, I am a homeschool mom Jen, and I loved this. I can relate to all those mixed feelings, the tearful goodbyes, and the new vocabulary. Except when you homeschool those things happen at summer camp instead of school. Please don't let one judgmental idiot spoil your perception of homeschoolers. We are ALL doing what is best for our own family. I'm sure you're perfectly capable of telling her to kiss your but though lol.

JuniperSunshine said...

There is nothing wrong with choosing an educational option that works best for your family. I happen to homeschool, but that does not make me a better mom than someone who makes a different choice. And I'm pretty sure Jen spends several hours a day writing and managing her household, so I wouldn't call that "not working". If we want people to accept homeschooling as a viable option, we can't come across all snarky and self-righteous about it. This is..... not helping with that.

Erin said...

lol, I could have written this post though we have 3 kids instead of just 2. Our school just moved to full-day Kinder but they have a staggered start, so baby girl will be ticked when she finds out she only "gets" to go to school with the big boys 1 day the first week. An interesting twist is my used to work from home DH just got laid off and we've decided to just enjoy being unemployed until Christmas or so. I thought it would take us that long to get annoyed with each other. Though, after a week of him starting to work less and lounge more, I'm thinking we may only make it to the end of September....

Erin said...

Juniper gave a well-thought response. I have been at home with my young children for many years now and the youngest is going off to public school this year, but last year I sent her off to preschool 2 days a week. I promise you I found plenty to do to help my family without the kids here besides loafing around-I cooked healthy meals instead of doing take-away; I did all the chores that have to be done while they were at school so we can enjoy family time in the evenings and weekends instead of them having to wait to have time with me while I'm doing laundry and baking, etc. These were the reasons we decided as a family to have me leave my career. We made a choice as a family to have them go to a great school next door to our house where we are involved and they have more opportunities than I can give them in our household so that I can take care of our home and sometimes work. Yes, I still work some. A dear friend lost her husband suddenly a few years ago leaving her pregnant and with a 1 year old and it made my husband and I realize that at anytime I could need to go back to work if something were to happen to him so I work sometimes to keep up my skills, certifications and that means I'm taking some of the stress off my husband because he knows that he's not our only option to keep us afloat. Our family works this way. Not every family does. My friend that lost her husband? She has to work for a living-homeschool is not an option for her through no fault of her own. That's great when homeschool works for your family, we do what works for our family, Jen does what works for her family. I can imagine it will be an adjustment for her-she'll have more time to write, but less material without her kids at home during the day ;)

Cherri Northcutt said...

I am curious to know what inappropriate TV fills up your DVR. My recommendations for adult viewing are You're the Worst, an FX show streaming on Hulu, Orange is the New Black on Netflix streaming, and Showtime's Happyish which you can watch from their website if you have Showtime. Jen, you kind of remind me of the Mom on Happyish, Just sayin'

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