Today I had some time on my hands and some seriously bushy eyebrows (as I was kindly reminded the other night). Instead of going to my usual waxing joint, I decided I'd go to someplace a little closer. I was running errands and I saw a sign for waxing. I figured I would pop in there instead of driving across town to my usual place.
The sign said walk-ins welcome and I was hoping I could just run in quickly, get the brows ripped, trimmed and tweezed into shape and be on my merry way.
I walked in and I was greeted by what I can only assume was the owner. "Hello. How can I help you?"
"Hello," I replied. "I'd like to get my eyebrows waxed please." The man looked me up and down thoroughly. He took in my caterpillar-like eyebrows and nodded in agreement.
"Yes. I can see that," he said.
I have to admit, that stung a bit, but I plowed on. "OK. So, do you have someone now or is there a wait?"
"No, we can take you now," he said studying my unibrow. He took a closer look at my face. "Just the brows?"
"Yes."
"Really? Just the brows? You sure? No lip?"
Oh fuck you very much!
"Yes," I growled. "No lip."
"Hmm....we do a good lip."
I wanted to say, Nice work, asshat. I don't know if you're up-selling me or trying to tell me I need to get my lip waxed. Either way, you're doing a shitty job and now I see why there is no one in here getting waxed.
Instead I gritted my teeth and said, "Just the brows today."
I swear, I'm so damn lazy sometimes. Next time I will drive across town where I'm given a cold beverage and told I'm ageing gracefully and they subtly tell me my lip needs to be waxed.
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ROFL! You women and your easily bruised egos! Come on now, he was getting straight to the point and not beating around the bush (ha!). Take the hint and get it waxed.
ReplyDeleteGo wax your ass, George.
DeleteRach, you just made me spit sprite...out my nose...from laughing. Ass waxing would hurt!
Deleteyah, wax your ass! hahaha.
Deletehahaha i agree with the ass waxing!
DeleteGeorge, who are you? Go away. Yes, yes, wax that hairy ass.
DeleteI can think of a few other places he should get waxed. Starts with a B and end with a Razalian. If men, just once, got waxed they would be so fast to tell women to do it.
Delete...they wouldn't. (darn phone)
DeleteThey've done that to me before. I gave in and did it one time, although it's not very noticeable at all. After it was done, I had a rash there for like 4 days. Never again! I just tell them now I break out when it's waxed and I'll pass. lol I just use my little Finishing Touch tool.
ReplyDeleteI have barely noticible eyebrows myself, them being translucent blonde. A place I used to get my nails done at would ask me every time if I wanted to get them waxed and after months I gave in to the sensitive waxing since I have sensitive skin. Well, my rash lasted longer than 4 days. Never again. You can't even tell I have eyebrows so no need to wax them.
DeleteThis is even more funny because there's an ad for the "no-no" right next to this! LOL
ReplyDeleteIt says "virtually" painless hair removal. Doesn't sound like it! lol
DeleteI totally get what you mean - I HATE when they say that shit. I am fully confident they do it just to upsell - because I can truly say I don't have a stache...but if I waxed I would eventually get one. It's like wax once and we know we'll have you rbusiness for life. Fucking dicks...
ReplyDeleteOnce, a woman at the Clinique counter asked me "Are you SURE you don't want to buy any concealer?" No, lady, I realize I have a zit, but I have plenty of concealer in my bag.
ReplyDeleteToo funny! One time the lady doing my brows actually grabbed a little piece hair on my lip and asked if I wanted my lip waxed. I don't have much body hair and the stuff on my face is supposed to be there...Hilarious.....
ReplyDeleteMy wax lady has been working on me for quite awhile...we started with brows then added the lip and now it's the entire face. No joke. I think I'm half yeti.
ReplyDeleteLOLOL!!
DeleteThey try to wax any- and everything! I was offered a chin wax when it wasn't even hair...it was acne. Pay attention! Then she said "oh, no hair, just bumpy." Thanks.
DeleteI love it. Never, never should a man, let alone a business owner (of a salon-esque) type place, comment on the looks of a woman being less than ideal. He stepped over the line of decency... And you should have told him you were a blogger, and would be reporting about his MISGIVINGS. loser. I don't care if I have a curly grey chin hair poking me in the nose... (well, I do care)... But seriously, I don't ever want it pointed out publicly, and not by a man. Subtly is key. I've had waxers say "here, let me grab this" while they're doing the finishing round of tweezing the eyebrows, and grab a stray hair I didn't know existed. But they didn't make a spectacle, and the didn't charge me. I made up for it in the tip. I have a huge TIP for that guy.... Stick to behind the desk/counter... And let the ladies/other employees approach the customers. Asshat was right. I bet he has HAIRS TOO. HAIRY ASSHAT. HA.
ReplyDeleteW.T.F. And you stayed? I would have probably kindly informed him (after studying his face) that you had changed your mind since obviously they are new at this and that's why HE had a unibrow. Doesn't matter if it wasn't true. I'm an asshole like that and will kindly return an insult.
ReplyDeleteLOVE this solution! !
Deletemy mom is convinced she has a mustache (she doesnt) after a similar encounter and has become completely paranoid about it. anytime me or my two sisters see her now she insists we're starting to grow them too and then begs us to go get "our mustaches" waxed together. so of course that means when we see here we all pretend to stroke our facial hair and tease her mercilessly. and even if she DID have a mustache, she's a natural blonde and you wouldnt be able to see the damn thing anyway!
ReplyDeleteThey ALWAYS ask "you want lip, too?" (I'm blonde, do not have a mustache, never have.) Then when you say "no" they look at you like, "Oh ok, Chewbacca...suit yourself." fml
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised he didn't ask about your 'china' too or weren't you wearing pj's?
ReplyDeleteLMAO
DeleteThe china requires my usual girl, two Advils and a shot of whiskey. No walk in joint will do.
DeleteI've had this happen to me and my teen daughter was with me. Her suggestion was next time to look him in the face and say, "No thank you. I'm trying to grow it out."
ReplyDeleteHA! That's a great comeback.
DeleteThat is a terrific one. I will use it next time definitely.
DeleteWhen did being rude and catty become the status quo? A lot of the nail salons do that around my city. I don't go back, either. I know I look like Tom Selleck if it's been a while, but that shit hurts, and I already endure enough pain for beauty.
ReplyDeleteThis is an amazing comment. lol. I agree. Dont we go through enough to look "decent"
DeleteThis also happened to me. I said yes and then had a RED lip for the rest of the night. grrrr.
ReplyDeleteI had the same thing happen to me! I went in to get my brows shaped and came out feeling like I was Tom Selleck's body double. When my brows start looking like I've been washing my face with Miracle Grow, I'll find a way to get to my threading place rather than suffer the ignominy that comes with a poorly phrased up-sell.
ReplyDeleteThreading lasts longer but don't believe it when they tell you it doesn't hurt. I never go to the mall, but make the exception every few weeks to hit the threading place, which is of course in the middle of the mall.
DeleteOuch, that hurt in more ways than one! It has become the "norm" in the last decade to have employees/owners who are lacking seriously when it comes to Customer Service. They are untrained, inexperienced and driving business away. My rule is to not give them a second chance to WIN my business. If the service is excellent I am loyal to the business and employee who goes "above and beyond", and tip accordingly. In an Depression #2 economy there is NO room for "just ok", expect nothing but the best for your dollar! If we support the "A" business, and reject the "F" they will disappear. In a time of such high unemployment and underemployment there is NO reason to hire anyone but the BEST!Just a note my Dad has owned and operated a successful business for 47 years in California, Top in our Industry in the USA(voted by peers).Expect nothing but the BEST!
ReplyDeletesigh... had a similar experience but with a pedicure... in broken english was told you should have your toe waxed... WTF?! And of course embarrassed I did it. Ugh, many moons later, now I stress about it every damn pedicure!
ReplyDeleteOMG! are you kidding me?! That would give me a total complex. Every time I put sandals on I would then worry about it...Stupid person! Thats so rude!
DeleteCrap, just this morning I was thinking I'm not going to drive all the way to the neighboring town to my usual girl that does my brows and I'll just stop at the local place. Maybe I should rethink that decision.
ReplyDeleteAn evil person. Probably has a very small penis. So that makes him insecure, so he tries to make others insecure. That's my theory, anyways :)
ReplyDeleteHilary is onto something ~ threading is the way to go...
ReplyDeleteIt pisses me off to go anywhere (nails, eyebrows, mechanic) and be asked, "Are you sure" when I say, "No thank you" to their 'extras'.
Dammit, if I wasn't sure I would have said, "I don't know"!
I've had the SAME thing happen. So the next time I went in, I got my lip done. The third time I went in, they asked if I wanted my face waxed. And THAT is when I realized I was going to cut a bitch and walked out.
ReplyDeleteWhat would happen of we all stopped ALL hair removal - and let men see reality?
ReplyDeleteI like how when I do wax my lip, the not-so-noticeable hair is replaced by a moustache of bright red bumps for a few days. It looks so pretty.
ReplyDeleteWow, talk about the WRONG way to run a business! Hope you didn't tip him. ;)
ReplyDeleteHaha! This always happens when I'm getting a manicure. Do you need eyebrow wax? No? Lip wax? No.
ReplyDeleteFine if they ask once, politely, But to insist. I would walk out. BTW, I had salon burn the skin on my eyelid before. Blamed it on sensitivity to the wax, Funny, never had sensitivity to the wax the 20 years since I started waxing....
ReplyDeleteYES!! I've had some terribly stinking of B.O. woman use wax that was too hot and rip off a huge strip of skin. Hurt more than a Brazilian!! If I wanted it done poorly, I could've done it myself, thanks!! People should have some training before asking to be paid for such services!
Deletewhat a jerk!
ReplyDeleteI need my big toes waxed and that creepy stray hair that keeps jumping out of my tricep...and grows at an inch a day...
ReplyDeleteno way! just whack those off when you shave your legs and underarms!
DeleteFuck the beauty salons -- last fall after a horrible, soul-crushing beauty salon experience, I started going to the aesthetician at the Johnson Co Dermatology practice here in Olathe. It's pretty much the SAME price as the salons AND she's professional.
ReplyDeleteHer name is Alicia and she does good lip.
I.hate.this. The worst was when they threw it out there when I was at the salon for a pedicure. Thanks for making me feel ugly when I'm here to feel pretty, a-hole.
ReplyDeleteThere are better ways to suggest selling addtional services. We go to salons to look and feel great. I myself will never again get my lips waxed. I get eyebrows done all the time but the one time my lips were done I broke out in rash that lasted several days. That was so much better than little stache. (sarcasm)
ReplyDeleteHad this been me, I fear the next question out of his mouth would have been, "Would you like your ass waxed?" cuz that's what he'd see when I completed the 180 turn and walked briskly back out the door.
ReplyDeleteAnd I even GET my lip done on occasion! Except I've moved on from waxing to sugaring. Much more comfortable than hot wax, fo' sho. But *I* initiate the service by request. My sugarist doesn't make "suggestions", thankfully.
On the other hand, I asked if they could do my jawline once, and the lady looked at me quizzically as she nodded, as if "why would you want that done?" and then when I tipped my head back for the eyebrows and she saw my jawline in the full light, her eyes got wide and she said "OOOOHHHHH, now I see". Nice. I love these comments - especially the suggestion to say you are growing it out...hahahahahaha!
ReplyDeleteThe first time I was "offered" a lip wax I was already on my back getting my eyebrows waxed. She snatched the lip and showed me the hair (lots!) on it and said "ooooh, ugly, that's ugly". Then she showed me my eyebrows and lip in the mirror and said "Pretty...like a model...come back in 2 weeks". Bitch please. You just told me I was ugly! I am a hairy beast so I have to get my lip waxed but damn!
ReplyDelete2 weeks????? Really?? OMG. How 's that for upselling!
DeleteI was walking in the mall minding my own business around Christmas time. The hair straightener guy came up and wanted to show me his product and then he started telling me how I have beautiful hair but I don't take care of it. HELLO? Now, I admit that my hair looked like sh*t but that was because I tried an experiment and it went horribly awry. And my DUMB *SS let him straighten A PIECE of my hair. Well then I just looked gorgeous.
ReplyDeleteThen I got home and thunk about what had happened.
Every other time I went to the mall and the guy came up to me I just said no thank you I've already been told how bad my hair looks enough for this year.
Ha, I've had the same thing happen to me before...give you warm fuzzies doesn't it?!
ReplyDeleteBonnie
Living A Wonderful Life
That's better than what my friend experienced at her nail salon. The lady told her, "Ms. Jen, you're so pretty, but your face messes it up," referring to her acne scars.
ReplyDeleteWTF??? Fuck punching her in the throat. I would've slit her throat from ear to ear.
OMG this happens to me all the time. I DO NOT HAVE LIP HAIR. Insulting.
ReplyDeleteYikes! Where did you go? I still haven't found a waxing place in JoCo that I like. But, admittedly, I haven't been to many places yet which is obvious by my Groucho Marx eyebrows.
ReplyDeleteCan I add my EX nail tech/brow waxer to your list of throat punches? FIFTEEN years ago she put a huge "dent" in the top of my right eyebrow (where it does not grow back). Instead of an apology and a free wax, all I got was an "Oops! It will grow back!" It never did, and to this day I have to pencil it in.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I have to add that - at least in the New England area - you can't beat the JC Penney salons - they are even better than the foo-foo specialty places!
ReplyDeleteAfter losing skin in the waxing process, I opted out for years and decided to bear out the years looking like my mother mated with Grover. I was tired if going on vacation with scabs where my eyelid should be...I was introduced to threading by my ex-hubs (the salon was his advertising client, but he could use a little maintenance himself). I will NEVER go back to waxing again. I love my Indian ladies and how they take care of me without judging my lip hair (just not going to start that unless it starts gathering food during a meal)
ReplyDeleteAfter that 'painful' experience (pre-service), the question is, how did it turn out? But then again, given that sort of treatment, I wouldn't think any amount of 'awesomeness' on your brows would make a difference. I just hope they did not overcharge you. :-)
ReplyDeleteYeah. So, I was getting my HAIR CUT. And halfway through, the guy puts down his scissors, picks up some thread, and without a word, begins threading my upper lip. Weirdest moment of my life.
ReplyDeleteSeveral years ago, when I had time on my hands, I was getting my nails done on a regular basis. The manicurist took a look at me and asked if I wanted my brows waxed. I said, "No. Why? Does it look like I do?" She said, "Oh yes. You hairy like my son!" I said ,"Oh no. You no want tip?"
ReplyDeleteSort of off topic but along the same lines.... I had to have emergency surgery after I gave birth to my 1st child. Since a) I had been pregnant and unable to see my "China" for a few months and b) it was winter in New York, things were a little overgrown. The anesthesiologist after administering my spinal went and sat on a stool by my feet and I guess he had a front row seat to the show. He turned to the nurse and said, "As a side business we should offer waxing, think of the money we could make." Had I not been numb from the waist down with my feet in stirrups I would have jumped up and not only punched him in the throat but I would have kicked him in the teeth too just to make sure he got the point.
ReplyDeleteYou've got to be kidding me. I would have wrote him up. And does n't he know not to piss off a lady, more so a pregnant one at that? What douche canoe...
DeleteYou guys seriously! As a licensed stylist you guys are killing me. First I would never let anyone in a chop shop touch my feet never mind my face. A lot of times They don't even have licenses that would be why you have all of the horror stories. Second as your stylist it is my job to keep You all looking your best so bet your ass I'm going to Tell you about your 70's porn star mustache(tactfully obviously).Third if y'all stop cheating on Your awesome stylists you would save yourselves (and us that have to clean up the mess) a ton of trouble. There is a reason why you can walk right in and get an apt. I know everyone is broke and busy right now but it is well worth it to prebook and stay safe. The red bumps are the least of your worries if you end up with a raging staph infection. I love Jen and anyone that "gets" her but I couldn't help myself this time.
ReplyDeleteI agree that he didn't have to agree so heartily that Jen needed it but would you rather walk around with your mustache? People wondering why you don't do something about it(they do). I also am a Cosmetologist, which means in my state of MN I am trained in all areas. Nail techs are not trained to wax, only do nail services. on a positive side hair on the toes means you have good circulation!!!
ReplyDeleteI made a vow to myself long ago: DON'T PAY FOR PEOPLE TO CAUSE ME PAIN. So, no waxing, no deranged personal trainer, and no excess visits to the dentist.
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